Hello sorry no I didn't have any bleeding at all. I was just wondering how your appointment went? I've just had my hospital letter and I'm going next week. I feel sick with nerves. 

Oh I'm so pleased to hear you got it done this time. Must be such a relief.

It's half the battle if the nurse listens.

Have tried that but was told I must be too tense when didn't work. I will definitely go to another clinic when they can get me in.

Hi Everyone, so pleased to have found this post.

I had my first attempted smear test today, I'm 28 and have been putting it off for years due to unsuccessful attempts of intercourse. 

I thought I would go and have the smear and a chat regarding my problems. The nurse was lovely, I explained that I tense up so bad that I think I'm stopping anything from being inserted. So she said we would give it a go today and go from there. 

She inserted the smallest device but as she tried to insert it further the pain was that unbearable she stopped the test. She explained that I was tensing so bad that was causing the problem.

I was so upset, I asked if I could be prescribed some muscle relaxation etc but she said I would need to speak to a gp. She also told me that this does happen to other women and not to worry but this has been ruling my life for so long now I just want it to be sorted. She mentioned counselling aswell, which I don't think will help me at all.

I've requested a call from a female gp to discuss my problems further. 

I'd rather just be sedated if I'm honest and go from there. :(

Hope everyone is well, and their smears are successful x

Your story sounds so similar to mine! I am 26 and have put off my smear for the last year as I have never been able to successfully have penetrative intercourse (I am pretty confident due to vaginismus). My first smear attempt a few months ago didn't work (even with the virgin speculum), so the nurse got the doctor to prescribe me diazepam and I went back last week for my second attempt, but the diazepam made no difference- I felt a bit woozy but I was still extremely tense, to the point where I even struggled to open my legs wide enough. I asked to be referred to have it done under general anaesthetic and the nurse said she would talk to the doctor but suggested I might need to go for counselling first. I have discussed psychosexual counselling re the vaginismus with the doctor before and I am willing to try it, but have never been in the right place to commit/ sort it out. The waiting times for the counselling are also extremely long and I don't want to delay the smear that long, so I am going to push for a gynaecology referral as well as the counselling. 

I don't think the lying flat position helps, I had a vaginal examination a few years ago for something unrelated using stirrups, and inserting a speculum was fine. So perhaps gynaecology will be able to offer that, or if not then yes I would also just rather be sedated! Hopefully the waiting list for gynaecology isnt too long. 

Hi, sorry you've had this experience - it's not true about the hymen being sealed if you have never had sex - I haven't either (I'm asexual too and have never liked the idea of putting anything up there) but the nurse did manage to do a smear. However you could perhaps ask a professional for advice and have a look if you think you'll be super tense like I was (that would make it hurt, whilst some people aren't hurt by the procedure). I would prefer in the future if they taught us how to do these things ourselves cause not being totally in control of what is happening sure doesn't help with the tenseness!

I hope that the next medical professional you meet will be helpful and know that hymens are not sealed - they have to not be sealed or otherwise period blood wouldn't be able to come out! 
 

i think the fear of disturbing the hymen is linked to the whole patriarchal idea of (men) valuing virginity in women, and the hymen being more likely to bleed during sex if someone was a virgin and had not had it disturbed before. There is some risk that putting something up there could disturb any tissue including the hymen and cause bleeding, though I'm not too concerned about that as any man who's obsessed with virginity in their partners would put me off even hanging out with them anyway for their treating femme people as possessions. 
 

so, there are some old fashioned attitudes and fears of making you look less like a virgin if you were to ever engage in sex that may put people off doing smears, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't be able to choose to have one and there's no physical reason you cannot. 
 

It may be harder to not tense up the muscles though, and that made it hurt for me, so I would probably seek some advice about how to avoid the tensed muscles - vaginismus - if I wanted to lower the chances of it hurting though. 
 

best of luck in finding a more helpful professional, and I hope you won't feel you have to do something you don't want to in order to get a test you're entitled to. Fortunately being totally ace lowers risk for hpv and cervical cancer - so having sex in order to do the screening may not help your chances, so unless you would otherwise want to try it  - which is totally fair ofc if so - I hope the nurse hasn't managed to put too much pressure on you that you feel you have to have sex to get this procedure done. I didn't have to, and I've never put anything up there, even tampons. 

It doesn't seem anyone's said that about you, but if they say or you feel you'd be unable to not let the vaginal muscle tense up too much, it would likely be safer to ask a doctor about how to prepare for these screening methods, and keep looking around until you find a good doctor who understands, so you have the least uncomfortable experience possible and don't have to hear any more myths rooted in the patriarchy's obsession with virginity. I believed that hymens were sealed too until I had a smear today and then googled it! Babies born with totally sealed hymens are actually operated on to solve this problem, which is rare and would stop menstrual blood going out.

re the screening, good luck to everyone whether you choose to go ahead with them or not. I hope someone invents good tools and trains medical professionals to allow people to do this stuff ourselves if we choose, with supervision is desired, as having more preparation and control would definitely have helped. The smear was successful though. Also, if you want them to be able to find the cervix more easily you can try to go sometime that's not during your period (as I learned the hard way)! 

Sending lots of love and solidarity to people in dealing with this uncomfortable procedure ️

best wishes,

monsie 

Wow, yes we do have very similar stories. I find it a relief to know I'm not the only one, but do sympathise with you as I know how tough it is. 

Since I written my last post, I've spoken to a female gp. She was very pleased I attempted the smear test, she said usually she would invite me in for a second attempt but she feels that because I've suffered so long that she would just like to refer me to gynecology. That was a few days ago so she said it would be a few weeks before I get a date. To be honest, the thought of going to gynecology is giving me anxiety and this is were it all stems from. I get really tense ans uncomfortable, the more someone tells me to relax the more I tense, it's a constant battle. It's really embarrassing, I grew up telling everybody I had done the deed and had intercourse as I felt like a bit of a freak not being able too and knoiwng nobody else who suffered with this condition. I am pretty sure that the more I read up on it, I really do believe it's vaginismus.

Please let me know any updates on your end. 

X

Hi, I've been reading through the forum and can relate to some of these posts... especially yours regarding the Virgin speculum. 

I had my first Smear today. I was so nervous... it ended up being very unsuccessful and extremely painful even with the Virgin speculum which I had to ask the Nurse to use even though it was on my notes. I'm 30 and have never felt particularly comfortable with the idea of anything being inserted (I have trauma with men even though I'm not interested in them) so have been putting the Smear off. I'm also very low risk fortunately since I've never felt the need to be with anyone. 

I've been giving myself a pep talk since I made my appointment last week. They caught me off guard with a phone call so I decided to make the appointment. 

The Nurse was so kind and supportive. I can't fault her, she was great. The pain though...I thought I was relaxed until the pain hit. She tried 3 times but had to stop because my muscles were too tight (possibly Vaginismus). She said she didn't want to cause me further trauma and damage inside. 

I'm not even humiliated, I'm just frustrated and upset at myself. The Nurse could see that I was beating myself up over it and said that "Our minds are our own worst enemy". She recommended that I speak to a doctor about it but said it's great that I even attempted it.

I just want up be knocked out, then wake up and it all be over. It's just so frustrating. 

I hope everyone here (including myself) manages to have the Smear as painlessly and as trauma-free as possible.

Sending love to everyone here

Your experience sounds just like mine. Just came home from a third failed attempt at a cervical screening and cried and cried!

The first two times the nurses jabbed away at my vagina till it bled, I was shaking and crying while they stood asking questions about my 'virginity' when I am a sexually active lesbian. I couldn't hold my legs how they wanted as I am disabled and noone helped me.

The third time I went today and nothing had changed, the exact same nurse as before. She told me she can't speak to the GP (who I also can't speak to as the phone will ring out for 5 hours straight) and if I book online I just get the same nurse. Today I couldn't even face her touching me and left in tears while she told me to eat less carbohydrates as 'maybe that has made you too tight'. 

I experienced previous sexual abuse and getting jabbed in the vagina with a speculum till you cry and bleed feels like experiencing it all over again. I feel sick to my stomach. I couldn't be touched for a long time after my failed screenings. I wanted to one day have children but I'm left feeling like my dream is impossible if I can't even face being touched by a doctor, they've made me feel so unsafe. 

I don't know what to do. I just want to be sedated so I'm unaware but the nurse said they can't do that. 

I am considering never going for a cervical screening, please help

hi everyone I'm new

Been reading on these forums for awhile, plucked up the courage to set up an account I don't really speak up about my problems but I'm so glad I am here and not alone when it comes to unsuccessful smears, first time I had sex I just turned 30, a year later I had to go for a smear I was very anxious, I have anxiety and panic attacks now social anxiety but at the time of having the smear I was dreading it the nurse used a metal device it hurt like a knife cutting me into two and bled alot since then I've been even more anxious in going again for a smear. The second time it was a different nurse she couldn't do it cos it hurt and I ended up crying so she referred me to a clinic they tried at least 3 attempts finally they got a sample but it hurt like a mother funkrr I couldn't walk for a day or 2, I got the results they found abnormal cells so was referred to the hospital for a colonoscopy? Don't know if that's how u spell it? The results came back clear then 3 years later had another smear it kinda was successful the nurse (same nurse from the previous time) had to be quick in getting a sample the pain was so bad I kept fidgeting but she managed just about getting a sample came back clear and today as of 18th May went for my smear she couldn't do it I ended up crying so she stopped and told me to ring my doctor to see wot else they could do for me but going to leave it till 2moro cos I still feel abit traumatised she is a lovely nurse btw but like alot on here are saying maybe she's not the right nurse for me I do have a tilted cervix, I am tall 5ft9 and 38 years old. 

Wished I knew about the tall device thingy prob it wouldn't of been a total failure