Emotional effects after major surgery

Hello everyone. I would like to introduce myself.

My name is Mags and i am new to the forum. I have 3 grown up children and 6 grandchildren and 3 very young great grandsons.

I was diagnosed in March 2016 with Endometrial Cancer. I had my Op in May 2016, but am still finding it very difficult to come to terms with what has happened to me.

I have always considered myself to be a fairly strong person and able to cope with anything that happened to come along but, have to admit this has changed my life in many ways I had never thought imaginable. Everything happened so suddenly and there i was, having all the tests, getting the results and being told what was going to happen next. It was like a massive whirlwind had picked me up and dropped me in the middle of the ocean and told me to swim back.

I was generally pleased with having the op as i couldnt wait to get this 'thing' out of me. I was looking forward to getting my life back on track and hopefully get back to doing some work. I had formally reired in September 2015. I decided i was going to have a few weeks off to do my Christmas shopping and then, after Christmas would look at taking on some agency work. That did not happen. I was in theatre for just over 6 hours as i had a particularly difficult operation, according to the surgeons, there had been some difficulties with how they were going to do the operation once they got inside. I then had difficulty breathing so the op was stopped andthen re started. This was because one of my breathing tubes had 'slipped' and had come out of place. I then needed some x-rays before being taken back to recovery. I was in recovery for 12 hours but only came round about 4/5 hours before being transferred to the main ward. I ended up in hospital longer than was first planned.

When i did get home, I was given a number to ring if i or my family had any worries. I still felt good at that point. Cutting a very long story short. I started to feel ill and tired and hot. I was informed that i was going through a second menapause and that this sometimes happens to some women after this type of operation.

I had nightmares about my cancer trying to climb out of my womb and spread around my body.I was referred to the Oncology Psychological department. As time has gone on, I have sufferd with depression and my relationship of 27 years has also suffered. I have tried to find further help and support in  my area but mostly come up against a blank wall. NHS counselling is like gold dust in my area, private counsellors are charging an average of 40/50 pounds per session.

I just feel that i have been left to 'get on' with it. Then I found Maggie's online cancer centre that has helped a good bit with some very good support. Now i have found this forum and am hoping that between this nad Maggies, I will at last, begin to see a light at the end of the tunnel. Thank you all for reading my post and I wish everyone well.

Mags.

  • Have your cancer nurses not put you forward for counselling? In Leeds my cancer nurses are brilliant. I also go to cancer support Yorkshire, a local cancer charity  run by ex patients. See if your nurses can put you in touch with some charities? X

  • Sassybro. Thank you so much for this information. I will follow this up. My next appointment is this Tuesday, so will have a word. The only referral i did have was to the Oncology Psycologist for the nightmares i was having. That has been helpful. I have touched on other areas but was advised i "might" need some specialist counselling. I know i must have a named nurse but have never had anyone come and introduce themselves. The original referral was done through the consultant and i dont see him again until April.

    Even those appointments havent been on time. My last one was cancelled " due to the unavailability" of consultants. It gave me another date but did not do much for my confidence. However, my GP is lovely and if all else fails i will ask her about Charities.

    I will look into the info you have given me and let you know how i get on. Again, thank you so much for your post.

    Mags.

  • I had my total hysterectomy back in 2012 and found the emotions and mood swings difficult to deal with. I was put forward for counselling by my Oncology Nurse Specialist. It was the best thing anyone could have done. Just to be able to vent at someone and know that you wasn't offending them was the best thing ever. Hope you get something sorted in the near future.