Mum has been diagnosed with stage 4 cancer and has not been given long to live

Hello my name is Alice I am 25 and a few weeks ago my Mum was diagnosed with cancer which has spread almost everywhere in her body and she has been given a few months to live. I feel very alone even though I have two siblings but I have never really been very close with them. I have been strong for everyone else during this time and neglected to seek help for myself until I went to see her yesterday and I am struggling even worse to deal with my thoughts and my feelings. I feel lost and scared and I have no idea what to do, feel or say 

Parents
  • Hi Alice, 

    I am so sorry to hear about your mum's stage 4 cancer diagnosis - it must be devastating for you to have found out that it has spread everywhere and she has been given just months to live. It is obviously a heart-breaking experience for you and it's normal that after looking after everyone and keeping strong, the emotions and feelings you have been bottling up  can suddenly become overwhelming. The loneliness you describe is something many of our members will be able to relate to as well as feeling lost and scared and not knowing what to do. 

    Our website has valuable information for Friends, Family and Caregivers with some good tips on how to support someone with cancer but also a section on taking care of yourself which is also very important as feeling well in yourself and recharging your batteries when you need to will help you cope better on a daily basis with seeing your mum so poorly. If you feel you are struggling, don't hesitate to get in touch with your GP and tell them how you have been feeling recently - they are there to listen and to give you some good advice so you can be stronger and feel better in the coming days and months. 

    I hope that you will speak to someone soon about this and that you will hear from other members of our community who have been through something similar before, who perhaps have also had a parent diagnosed with stage 4 cancer and who know exactly how you may be feeling at the moment. 

    We're thinking of you, your mum and your family during this difficult time and we wanted you to know that you are not alone.

    Best wishes, 

    Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

Reply
  • Hi Alice, 

    I am so sorry to hear about your mum's stage 4 cancer diagnosis - it must be devastating for you to have found out that it has spread everywhere and she has been given just months to live. It is obviously a heart-breaking experience for you and it's normal that after looking after everyone and keeping strong, the emotions and feelings you have been bottling up  can suddenly become overwhelming. The loneliness you describe is something many of our members will be able to relate to as well as feeling lost and scared and not knowing what to do. 

    Our website has valuable information for Friends, Family and Caregivers with some good tips on how to support someone with cancer but also a section on taking care of yourself which is also very important as feeling well in yourself and recharging your batteries when you need to will help you cope better on a daily basis with seeing your mum so poorly. If you feel you are struggling, don't hesitate to get in touch with your GP and tell them how you have been feeling recently - they are there to listen and to give you some good advice so you can be stronger and feel better in the coming days and months. 

    I hope that you will speak to someone soon about this and that you will hear from other members of our community who have been through something similar before, who perhaps have also had a parent diagnosed with stage 4 cancer and who know exactly how you may be feeling at the moment. 

    We're thinking of you, your mum and your family during this difficult time and we wanted you to know that you are not alone.

    Best wishes, 

    Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

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