Hi

I'm really sorry about your dad it's awful really is.

I know what you going through my husband has advanced stomach cancer inoperable 

He got diagnosed in January up to now he's had 3 radio and 2 chemo coudnt have a 3rd cycle as he has been suffering with sickness really bad even when he stopped the chemo.

Palliative care have been great they have been trying to get on top of he's antisickness meds he has a driver fitted so all meds go through that.

However tday we got the devastating news that the chemo hasn't worked and the reason for all the sickness is the cancer is blocking the stomach so he had to have a stent fitted next week.

Our cancer nurse said that they won't do anymore chemo so I'm really worried what's going to happen now. We will speak to ongulist on Tuesday. 

As for your dad he should have a Macmillan nurse we only got ours 2 days ago she's brilliant and really understanding for your dad and rest of family.

He's your dad too so you need to do what you think is best for him.

It is really difficult to get cancer patients to eat and drink as they lose they taste.

I just kept trying with my husband with different drinks and now he is drinking quite well.

When did your dad get diagnosed? 

You really need to get intouch with Macmillan cancer support they do everything you need they all like the middle man they deal with GPS district nurses chemist and hospitals for you .

Sorry for the long message 

I'm here if you want to chat 

Take care m x

Hi

I'm really sorry about your dad it's awful really is.

I know what you going through my husband has advanced stomach cancer inoperable 

He got diagnosed in January up to now he's had 3 radio and 2 chemo coudnt have a 3rd cycle as he has been suffering with sickness really bad even when he stopped the chemo.

Palliative care have been great they have been trying to get on top of he's antisickness meds he has a driver fitted so all meds go through that.

However tday we got the devastating news that the chemo hasn't worked and the reason for all the sickness is the cancer is blocking the stomach so he had to have a stent fitted next week.

Our cancer nurse said that they won't do anymore chemo so I'm really worried what's going to happen now. We will speak to ongulist on Tuesday. 

As for your dad he should have a Macmillan nurse we only got ours 2 days ago she's brilliant and really understanding for your dad and rest of family.

He's your dad too so you need to do what you think is best for him.

It is really difficult to get cancer patients to eat and drink as they lose they taste.

I just kept trying with my husband with different drinks and now he is drinking quite well.

When did your dad get diagnosed? 

You really need to get intouch with Macmillan cancer support they do everything you need they all like the middle man they deal with GPS district nurses chemist and hospitals for you .

Sorry for the long message 

I'm here if you want to chat 

Take care m x

Hi Busby, thanks for responding to my call for help. I'm so sorry to hear about your husband. My Dad was diagnosed in November that he had cancer & he didn't tell anyone cos he is really private & didn't want to ruin Christmas for us. They put the camera in 30 December & said we are sorry there is nothing we can do for you only palliative Chemotherapy & radio for spine.

I'm really worried about him not drinking cos dehydration is really serious. I hope it's the nausea making not want to drink and not that he has given up. Right, talking to you has made my mind up. Im getting McMillan involved cos he is only suffering & wouldn't tell you if he was in angony. So someone needs to step in & say you need palliative care right away.

If you don't mind me asking, what drugs is your husband on? I do hope your husband gets his strength back & with the help of McMillan they can start his chemo again. No one outside immediate family knows so it's good to get some of this off my chest. Thank you & let's keep in touch x

Hi 

I'm really glad you are going to get intouch with Macmillan I think you will have to get a refaral from he's GP or cancer nurse specialist but they are really quick to sort it .

Your dad sounds like my husband doesn't want to upset anyone by telling them

You need to tell him the district nurse cancer nurse specialist will make him go to hospital to be put on a drip to get get fluids down him .

They told my husband that then he did keep up with he's fluids drinking is more important than food really.

My husband was having a lot of milkshakes which is really good with full fat milk and cream .

My husband is on steroids a antisickness drug called metoclopramide the Macmillan nurse had also give him a new antisickness drug which she swears by I'm not sure what it is called but I will find out for you .

My husband is very stubborn but he knows he had to accept everything they throw at him .

I have just left the hospital an hour ago I have been very lucky the cancer nurse specialist made sure that I can see him when I want has in a side ward and I have had both covid jabs 

It is so hard to see a person you love go through this evil disease but you have to try to be strong for them.

Keep me updated please

Look after your dad and yourself  

Take care m x

I'm glad they let u visit your husband and haven't they let u stay late!! Must have been awful for those people who couldn't visit loved ones cos of covid. 

My daughter doesn't even know yet. That is what is keeping me awake at night. How am I going to break it to my daughter cos grandad is her definitely her favourite. I won't be able to tell her until right at end cos her mum my ex is a gossip & it will be all over Facebook before we tell the rest of the family in Ireland & America. It's her holy communion on the 4th July cos it was delayed because of bloody covid. She will be so disappointed grandad won't be attending. Don't even know if he will be still with us. 

That is what we are all suffering from, is the uncertainty!! I will shut up now. U must be knackered x

Hi Mark

Its a really tricky situation about your daughter telling her. Bloody Facebook I hate it me .

You need to talk to your dad explain the situation.

It's awful because your daughter needs to know really 

Easier said than done I know 

You take care m x

Yeah I hate Facebook too. Never have liked it. Yes You're right, I really need to speak to my dad about my daughter because I don't want to find out last when it's too late. But my dad doesn't want her mum finding out & spreading the bad news. So it awful situation to be in. Thanks for the advice & look after yourself x

Hi Mark 

How's things with you ? 

We just waiting now for stent to be fitted I'm really hoping it's tomorrow. 

Ian hates been in hospital Thank God he's in a side room.

I hope after he's op he will go back to the side room not a ward because he won't be happy at all it's full of women

How's your dad tday ? 

Take care Marie x

Fingers crossed the op goes well and and your husband goes back into a side room. That gives you more freedom to visit too. I have my daughter today so not seen my dad but apparently he is eating a little more & feeling a bit better. I'm going to visit them tomorrow & have a long conversation about McMillan help and getting more palliative care for my dad. He is only suffering between each Chemotherapy session & that is not right. Thanks for asking Marie x

Thankyou for your reply it's great news your dad is eating and drinking better.

He shoudnt be suffering at all like I say the palliative team are good but Macmillan are amazing their for him and the rest of the family making sure he gets what he needs hope you get sorted asap 

Message anytime I'm happy I can give you advice Marie x

Thanks Marie you have been a great a huge help & I feel more confident talking to my family now about McMillan. U  r a star x

Awww that's ok anytime x