HI Jturnie,

A very warm welcome to our forum, although I'm sorry to hear what brought you here. My sincere condolences on the loss of your mum. Unfortunately, I know just how devastating and confusing it is to lose a loved one so quickly. 

My mother-in-law had dementia and, my 97 year old father-in-law, nursed her at home for 6 years. When she died he was totally devastated, as they had been together for 70 years. He then started to complain about how sore his back was. We took him to see his GP 5 times to be told that it was only arthritis and for him to be given anti-inflammatories. Eventually, after seeing several of the doctors in the practice, one decided to sent him to the day hospital for assessment.

He was kept in and that afternoon, we were told that he had cancer throughout his body and that, at best he had weeks to live. He survived for 5 days. Sadly, just three months after that, his youngest son, who was 53, was found dead in bed and, despite holding a post mortem, no conclusive reason was found for his death.

It is so hard to come to terms with a sudden death at any time, but all the more difficult when you feel that, symptoms were overlooked, despite attending doctors at the time.

Despite these tragic losses, we have to be able to let our anger go, or it ends up consuming us. Life is too short to let that happen. I sincerely hope that you can find some way of coming to terms with your loss, despite the circumstances and I hope that you and your dad can support one another in your grief.

KInd regards,

Jolamine xx

HI Jturnie,

A very warm welcome to our forum, although I'm sorry to hear what brought you here. My sincere condolences on the loss of your mum. Unfortunately, I know just how devastating and confusing it is to lose a loved one so quickly. 

My mother-in-law had dementia and, my 97 year old father-in-law, nursed her at home for 6 years. When she died he was totally devastated, as they had been together for 70 years. He then started to complain about how sore his back was. We took him to see his GP 5 times to be told that it was only arthritis and for him to be given anti-inflammatories. Eventually, after seeing several of the doctors in the practice, one decided to sent him to the day hospital for assessment.

He was kept in and that afternoon, we were told that he had cancer throughout his body and that, at best he had weeks to live. He survived for 5 days. Sadly, just three months after that, his youngest son, who was 53, was found dead in bed and, despite holding a post mortem, no conclusive reason was found for his death.

It is so hard to come to terms with a sudden death at any time, but all the more difficult when you feel that, symptoms were overlooked, despite attending doctors at the time.

Despite these tragic losses, we have to be able to let our anger go, or it ends up consuming us. Life is too short to let that happen. I sincerely hope that you can find some way of coming to terms with your loss, despite the circumstances and I hope that you and your dad can support one another in your grief.

KInd regards,

Jolamine xx