Hi,my mum was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer just over 18months ago, she also has it in her lymph nodes and rib,she has had immunotherapy and radiation therapy,she seemed to pic up a little bit,but now she is in a lot of pain and lost loads of weight, last few days she has spent most of it in bed, she in 40 mg morphine twice a day plus the liquid when needed, the consultant said he is considering cemo but thinks the side effects would be too much, can anyone tell me if this could be the end or could she pic up again,im at a loss as to what to expect 

Hi Loo1512, I'm sorry to hear that. I can't really help on what could happen next. I know Jolamine will be able to help you more. From my experience with my mum once you are too weak for treatment it usually means that there isn't too much more they can do. I know everybody is different though. Try and savour every moment you can with your mum. All the time you can spend together is special. My thoughts are with you and your mum. X

Simon 

Hi Simon,

I am glad to hear that you are coping. It sounds as if you are keeping busy with transferring papers into your name. There is always a lot of tis work to be done and it can be quite time consuming and frustrating at times.

Have you got someone to help with what benefits you are entitled to? It is difficult to do this on your own, but the people at the CItizen's Advice Bureau are usually very helpful with this, as are social workers.

You will find it very strange living on your own now and I hope that you will get used to it, although it will take time.

We are not doing too badly, thanks Simon. Hubby hasn't been so good for the past couple of weeks, but is seeing the doctor on Friday. I am waiting to see the cardiologist again about my high blood pressure. Otherwise we're both ok.

Thinking of you. Take care of yourself.

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine, I'm sorry to hear your husband hasn't been well. Hopefully the doctor can help him today and the cardiologist can help with your blood pressure too. Yes I have felt quite busy even though I'm not actually doing that much! Just lots of things to organise with the house and bill paperwork, it does feel endless at times!

I have looked into it and I do believe I may be eligible for PIP so I am applying for that. Every little bit helps, I must admit when my mum and dad were around it didn't matter so much but now I do need to claim anything I am entitled to. You are right Jolamine, I am going to see citizens advice just to make sure I am doing everything I can. 

It has felt quite strange on my own, again with being so busy you don't really notice and then all of a sudden it hits you! I guess it's just getting used to it over time. I am managing ok though. Thank you so much Jolamine, I hope your appointments go well. You take care.

Simon x

Hi Simon,

It has been some time since I last heard from you and you have been in my thoughts. I hope that you have managed to get most of your paperwork sorted by now and that you are getting more accustomed to living on your own.

Kind regards,

Jolamine x

Hi Jolamine, I hope you are well. I was just thinking about you the other day! I looked and saw you had been online so I was going to message you. I know I haven't checked in for a while. I'm doing ok thanks. Slowly getting used to things now. I'm not so keen on holidays like Easter as they are always times you seem to miss them most! 
You do just get used to things don't you, time passes and you have to try and make the best of it. I still haven't wrapped my head around the fact they are both gone yet but I know that will take time. It is sinking in now though as things become more normal. How have you been Jolamine, is your husband doing ok? 
Have you got any plans for Easter, I'm not doing too much although I did get myself an Easter egg! I hope you are well. 

Simon x

Hi Simon,

I don't want to keep pestering you, as you begin to come to terms with all that has happened. However, rest assured that you can always message me and you are always in my thoughts. Unfortunately, holidays and anniversaries are always hard. I'm glad to hear that you treated yourself to an Easter egg. I avoided the temptation to buy any for ourselves, but I did get our grandchildren one each.

I hope that you have manaed to sort out your finances and that you were eligible for some benefits.

We are seeing a big difference in hubby's memory and he is slowing down a lot. However, I suppose that this is all to be expected. We have had beautiful weather here for Easter and have spent the weekend buying a new carpet and paint for a room that we're redecorating. I'll need to start painting tomorrow, as the carpet will arrive in a couple of weeks.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine, I promise you are never a pest. I appreciate that you are always looking out for me. It is very kind of you! I'm so sorry to hear that about your husband. Hopefully it's a slow decline and his health remains as good as possible. I know it must be difficult for you both. 
Yes I didn't think I would bother for Easter but I thought my mum would want me to have one. I'm trying to keep the spirit even when it's hard. I think some of the things I couldn't even think about doing without my parents before seem a little bit more possible now so I am coming to terms with things although I know it will take time. You should treat yourself to an egg Jolamine, I know they aren't good for you but I thought as a one off why not. I know it's easy to get carried away with chocolate though! 
I did manage to get PIP so that has helped a lot. It has taken a weight of my mind as I am a little bit more comfortable now financially and don't worry so much. 
 

That sounds good Jolamine, so you will have a busy weekend painting the room. I was going to say don't do too much but I'm guessing you like to keep busy. How has it been not working, are you getting more used to it now. It must still feel strange for you. You take care Jolamine.

Simon x

Hi Jolamine, I just wanted to check that you were doing ok. I just had a look on your profile and saw you had covid. That’s awful Jolamine. I hope you are managing as best as you can. I hope your husband is doing ok too. I just wanted to check in, you take care Jolamine. x

Simon

Hi Simon,

Thank you for your good wishes. Hubby and I have both had Covid. We think that he got it at the stroke club and kindly brought it home to me. It's been a tough few weeks, but we are at last testing clear, although still totally exhausted.

How are you doing? I hope that you are making the most of all this good weather.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine, I’m so sorry to hear that. I’m glad you are finally clear although it sounds like you still are getting a lot of the after effects. Hopefully that clears with time and you both feel better. Ah did he, it’s so easy to pick things up isn’t it these days.

I’m doing ok thanks Jolamine. I have, it’s been really nice weather hasn’t it! I have just been pottering around trying to tidy up the garden. Just do little bits at a time, it does give me a reason to go out and get some sun though which is good! I have just been trying to work out the new forum too, it’s totally different isn’t it! I’m getting there now! I hope you both continue to feel better Jolamine! You take care. 

Simon x

Hi Simon,

We certainly still have some of the after effects, but hopefully they'll clear with time.

I'm glad to hear that you are doing ok  and that the good weather is tempting you to tidy up the garden. We have lived in our house for over 40 years. We noticed that some of our lawn was beginning to sink at Christmas. When we investigated it fully, we discovered a 12 foot wide and 10 foot deep hole. We had the mining company out along with Scottish water, but neither could shed any light on the cause. We have now filled in the hole with 8 tons of stone and are waiting for this to settle before we lay more grass on top.

Yes the new forum is totally different. I must confess that I am missing some of the older attributes, that they seem to have done away with, but it is good not to be constantly losing posts. Thank you for your good wishes.

Take care,

Jolamine xx

Hi Simon,

We certainly still have some of the after effects, but hopefully they'll clear with time.

I'm glad to hear that you are doing ok  and that the good weather is tempting you to tidy up the garden. We have lived in our house for over 40 years. We noticed that some of our lawn was beginning to sink at Christmas. When we investigated it fully, we discovered a 12 foot wide and 10 foot deep hole. We had the mining company out along with Scottish water, but neither could shed any light on the cause. We have now filled in the hole with 8 tons of stone and are waiting for this to settle before we lay more grass on top.

Yes the new forum is totally different. I must confess that I am missing some of the older attributes, that they seem to have done away with, but it is good not to be constantly losing posts. Thank you for your good wishes.

Take care,

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine, yes I believe it is difficult to shake of the after effects but hopefully in time you both feel normal again. I’m sure it took it out of you both. 
Wow did you Jolamine, that is crazy. A 10 foot hole! I guess uiu don’t know with these things till you check. I bet that took some filling in, that’s a big hole! Isn’t it strange how they couldn’t find a cause for it. One minute the lawn is sinking, the next you have a huge hole! Hopefully it settles soon than you can lay more grass on top. 

My garden is mostly concrete with a few plants dotted around. I have been trying to get rid of the weeds, they are a real pain! It does get me up mad about thought and once it’s done I will feel a sense of accomplishment. I just do a little bit each day! It was ultra hot yesterday here, it’s difficult to sleep when it gets that warm isn’t it! 

it is isn’t it Jolamine, I suppose after a bit of time you get used to the change with the forum but it’s hard work at first. I’m glad you aren’t losing all your posts! Thank you Jolamine! You take care and I hope you and your husband continue to feel better soon.

Simon x

Hi Simon,

I hope that the after effects don't last for too long, as they've really knocked me for 6. With regards to our hole.  I am so relieved that my children or grandchildren haven't fallen into it, before we discovered it.

My ideal garden is now one like yours. We really will have to move soon, as the garden is too big for me to keep. It's a constant battle with he weeds - great when it all looks neat and tidy, then all back again in no time. We have had lovely weather here for the past month, but it does make it difficult to sleep at night.

I suppose that we'll get used to the new forum with time, but it doesn't seem as intuitive as the old one.

Jolamine xx

yes dear i understand and i wish you always good and smiles to you freshness to you and saying words to me will makes you feel light and i also will share my words to you i am happy to hear about your garden and i feel freshness to imagen your sweet garden the weather to me is also very lovely here nowdays and i enjoy like you its nice meeting to you and we can keep in touch to each other 

Hi Jolamine, hopefully the symptoms aren’t long term. I can only imagine how difficult it has been for you both. Hopefully over time they disappear.
I’m sure you were shocked about the hole. I’m glad the children didn’t have any mishaps. You don’t expect things like that to happen! 
It sounds like it’s very difficult for you to keep on top off. I must admit I would like a large garden but as you said you have to keep on top of it and then once it’s done it’s not long before you have to do it again! I must admit with mostly concrete it’s just once every couple of years which does make it easier! I do know what you mean though. We have some hedges and they are constantly growing and need trimming!

It has been very warm today here Jolamine, it’s a bit too much for me once you get near 30! Hopefully it’s not too hot to sleep tonight! I agree about the forum, I went back to edit my post as there was a few spelling mistakes and it wouldn’t let me change anything. I do miss the edit function. I guess everything is hard work at first though! I hope you have had nice weather there Jolamine. You take care. 

Simon x

Hi Bhattimrp,

Welcome to our forum.

Yes, we have had a fantastic spell of weather. Can I ask, have you had cancer of any kind and is there anything we can help you with?

Kind regards,

Jolamine 

Hi Simon,

I hope that the side-effects won't be long-term. We were certainly very surprised to find a hole of that size in a garden, which we have tended and played in for so many years. The garden is an acre in size, with large hedges on all four sides and I have over 100 pots to tend to, as well as the greenhouse and the rest of the garden. It was great for the children to play in when they were small, but it's too much for me now.

This is the warmest day that we've had and it really felt quite oppressive. I was expecting to have thunder and lightening tonight, but it hasn't come yet.

I see an edit function back at the bottom of posts. I haven't tested it out yet, but hope that it works, as most of us find this very useful.

Regards,

Jolamine xx

hi there i am not in Cancer but my sister was in breast cancer and to sharing and listening to ppl and their experiences i am here.also to encourage ppl not going into sad let them feel light and cool

Hi bhattimrp,

I am sorry to hear about your sister. When was she diagnosed? I  hope that she is in remission now.

Kind regards,

Jolamine 

Hi Jolamine, I just wanted to check in and see how you are doing. I hope you and your husband are well and you are both feeling better now with no side effects after having covid.
I am doing ok, I’ve just been getting on with things. I know I haven’t spoke in a while but I wanted to wish you Merry Christmas and I hope you have a nice time. You take care Jolamine.

Simon x

Hi Simon,

It's lovely to hear from you and I'm glad to hear that you are doing ok. I'm sure that you've had some sad moments too, but it's good to hear that you are getting on with things. Did you manage to get your benefits sorted?

This year has flown by for us. We are still suffering the after effects of COVID, which has left us both exhausted. We are planning to move house in the New Year. It's about time that we downsized, as the garden is getting too much for me now. We are planning on moving closer to my son and his family, so it will be quite a change. What are your plans for Christmas? Whatever they are, I hope that you have a Very Happy Christmas and a good New Year.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx