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Struggling to cope with dads cancer

xxhan88xx
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Hi

my dad got diagnosed with bowel cancer 3 years ago, we then got told 6 months later after radiation and chemotherapy that his cancer had spread to his lungs. He was told it wasn't curable and chemo would only pro long his life. He has been super strong and been having chemo ever since, he does 6 months and then 3 months off. Recently I have noticed a decline with my dad, and I am really struggling with the whole thing. I've been trying to be strong for everyone and hold all my feelings in but it's making me I'll. everyday I feel rubbish, there's always something wrong. I don't know how I will cope without my dad, and the thought of it scares me. 
every day he is going around my head 24/7, I wish that this wasn't happening to him and that a miracle would happen. I think I just need someone to talk too. I'm trying to be there for everyone else and keep a smile on my face. Some days are just so hard. 
 

thanks for reading 

Parents
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    Hi, 

    Im so sorry to hear your story, I can completely relate. My Dad has lung cancer and I have recently seen a rapid decline, somehow even though you know what is coming it doesn't seem real and then all of a sudden it hits you and it's suffocating. I also can't get the thought out of my head, I can't do anything without thinking about it or getting upset, I can't focus or concentrate on anything. I don't really know how I'm helping here but just wanted to let you know you aren't on your own.

  • Offline in reply to Popayah

    Hi popayah, 

    how are you doing? Thankyou so much for your reply. It helps to be able to talk to someone that understands. Tomorrow my dad gets his scan results after 6 months on chemo and I'm Praying it's good news. I have felt so sick all day today and no doubt I will tomorrow untill I hear from him.  He's always had good results so far so I'm holding on to that hope. 
     

    how is your dad doing? My dad hasn't been great recently I can definitely see the decline and to be honest I'm really struggling seeing him like it. 
     

    hope your enjoying the nice weather xx

Reply
  • Offline in reply to Popayah

    Hi popayah, 

    how are you doing? Thankyou so much for your reply. It helps to be able to talk to someone that understands. Tomorrow my dad gets his scan results after 6 months on chemo and I'm Praying it's good news. I have felt so sick all day today and no doubt I will tomorrow untill I hear from him.  He's always had good results so far so I'm holding on to that hope. 
     

    how is your dad doing? My dad hasn't been great recently I can definitely see the decline and to be honest I'm really struggling seeing him like it. 
     

    hope your enjoying the nice weather xx

Children
  • Offline in reply to xxhan88xx

    Hi xxhan88xx

    My Dad actually passed away at the weekend, I'm so sorry if this in any way upsets you. He was the best person and absolutely didn't deserve this, I'm sure you feel the same way about your Dad, everything just seems so cruel and unfair.

    I really hope that you get good news tomorrow . I too found watching the decline very hard but I found a lot of comfort in helping him in any way that I could, he was always so so grateful of everything I did for him. I did start to struggle with the fact I felt like I couldn't remember how he was before getting ill, I have photos and videos but everything is too hard to look at right now. 
     

    I hope that you are managing to cope ok, feel free to message if you want to carry on speaking, like I said fingers crossed for good news tomorrow xx

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