HI Asmit,

My sincere sympathy on the loss of your mum. It is never nice seeing someone you love having to go through so much and not being able to right things for them. It is still too soon for you to be able to focus on your happy memories, as it takes some time for the memories of those last weeks to begin to fade. I found it helpful to have a photo of my mum in a prominent place where I could talk to her after she passed. I still have that photo 24 yers on, but find that although I still talk to her at times, I don't do it as often as I used to.

I am sure that your mum would be the last person to want to see you so unhappy. You will find it easier if you have someone who you can talk to about your mum and, then those happier memories will gradually begin to return. Have you considered talking to a Cruse counsellor about your mum? Sometimes it helps to talk to a stranger about how you are feeling, especially when they have experience of death and, can talk you through the various stages of grief. 

No two people respond to grief in the same way, so please try not to be too hard on yourself. It will take as long as it takes to come to terms with your loss and, this is something that you cannot rush.

Thinking of you and hoping that you find the strength to get through this.

Kind regards,

Jolamine

Hey [@Asmit88]‍ 

I've replied on one of your posts before as our mum's were taken very poorly at round aboht the same time. 

It's so so so difficult, I think what has happened only just hit me on Sunday and when it did, I felt like a bus had run me over. I like you, want to be alone. Have you thought about seeking therapy? The few sessions I've had, have helped me so far. It just gives you space to process what is going on in your mind, whatever that may be, and try to work through it without judgement. 

Just wanted to say, I'm sending you a huge amount of love and support, and I know it feels like we won't get through it, we will. You were clearly so brave and supportive of your lovely mum, throw that behind yourself right now. You deserve it. 

Big love, and a HUGE virtual hug. Xxx

Hi [@Newlife101]‍ , yes I remember you now. Thankyou for replying to me again. Oh bless you, do you have days where it hits you and then just normal days? I do. I have mixed emotions all the time. I have decided to take some therapy, although I am nervous about it as I don't know what to expect. But I'm hoping it helps. Thankyou for your kind words. You also sound very brave, and your mum will be so proud of you for that, she will be pleased to know you are helping others like me get through this. And do you know what.......we will. Our mothers were so amazing and strong, and they will live on in us. Big loves and hugs to you too. If ever you need to talk I am always here ️ Xxx

Hey [@Asmit88]‍ 

I do have good and bad days, I think as Jolamine kindly said though, I think we will eventually get to the stage where we have more good days, than bad days. I will always remember my mum, and think about her everyday, and I know with time, we will both remember the good times and the love we shared. Even though she may not be physically here, your mum will be with you every step of the way. 

I completely get why therapy seems scary, but I think it provides a great outlet to speak about how you are feeling, and put yourself first and get the support that you need, and really deserve right now. 

Thanks for saying such lovely things, it genuinely made me smile. And right back at you if you want to chat.  lots of loveXXXX

Hey [@Newlife101]‍ , how are you feeling? Just a little update, I have had my first bit of therapy and it has helped a lot. Once I started talking I felt so comfortable, and felt like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I have found that talking about mum and pictures are also massively helping me. I hope your doing ok.  
 

take care xxx

Hey [@Newlife101]‍ , how are you feeling? Just a little update, I have had my first bit of therapy and it has helped a lot. Once I started talking I felt so comfortable, and felt like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I have found that talking about mum and pictures are also massively helping me. I hope your doing ok.  
 

take care xxx

Hey [@Asmit88]‍ 

Its really lovely to hear from you, and I am very happy that therapy has been a weight off your shoulders, I'm sure your mum will be so proud of the steps you're taking to make yourself feel better! It's nice to talk to someone without judgement isn't it?

I'm doing okay, somedays are definately better than others right now. I'm speaking to a therapist too which is helping but I just am finding this forum, and speaking to people who are unfortunately way too young to have lost a parent a huge comfort, as it feels very isolating as many people cannot relate to how I am feeling. Have you found that? 

Keep taking small steps forward, sending you lots of love and if you ever want to chat, rant or anything at all, please message me. Lots of love XXXX