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i need some help

adam95
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hi my name is adam i have nerer done anything like this befor but i really dont know what to do i was stood over a bridge tonight ready to jump and i know deep down its not the answer and selfish of me but im in so much pain i cant cope only thing thsat really stoped me was my mum sayin to bee stong i lost my mum to glioblastoma stage 4 on 14 april 2019 she was diganosed in 15th december2018 from being a normal family my whole life turned upside down just befor christman i got a call sayin my mum was having a fit/seziure and could not speak or walk so she was took to hospital and was told she had a shadow on her brain from that day my life changed foever i lost not just my mum but my best friedd somoen who understood me when nobody in this world would understand from then i have been on a roolercosted that will never end 3 months after my mums deadth witch was so quick she was not able to be opareated on so she detreated so quick it was heart brakeing to see my mum so scared i lost my dad to who i needed more than ever at this point but i aslo just keeped my head up and tried to be stong i know im only 25 and there are poeople out there in this wrold who are so much worse off than i am bbut at this moment i meskef is really not doing good i dont wana to be here any more i just want my mum back i still have my sister but her head is in the smae place as mine if not worse she has 3 chilidren to look after an keep her sain but my mum will nere get to see my child grow my mum will never get to see me get married or starte a family like any man deams of i am not one for doing posts like this but i really am on me last legs rock bottom and cant find a way out 

 

thankyou if you have read this  adam 

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    Hello Adam, 

    I will echo what Chriss who seems to have had a similar experience to you in the past has said. You've done the right thing to reach out here. We are all here for you and wanted you to know that you are not alone, that many of our forum members know exactly how you are feeling. I am so sorry for the loss of your mum it all seems still very raw to you and having lost your dad as well it must have been a really tough time for you. But as Chriss said, keep being strong and listening to that voice that is telling you to carry on, that even though it is hard to think about this right now, life will also bring you happiness, and even though your mum may no longer be around to see you as you said start a family or get married, as Chriss said you will always feel her presence around you and she would undeniably want you to be happy and would be very proud of you for carrying on. 

    If you ever feel as down as you were last night or generally feel low and need to talk to someone, do reach out and as Chriss suggested ring the Samaritans helpline - it is open 24h a day so do keep their number with you and give them a call. You can call them for free on 116 123 and you can also find out about other ways to contact them on this page.

    I think it would also be a good idea to give your doctor a call tomorrow and to mention how you've been feeling, how your grief has been overwhelming. Your GP will no doubt be able to point you in the right direction and for example offer grief counselling. Don't be afraid to mention how you felt last night and how you feel you have reached rock bottom and need help. 

    I hope you feel a little better today and also knowing that you are not alone, that so many on this forum will relate to how you are feeling at the moment. We are all here for you anytime you need to reach out. Keep strong Adam I know it's really hard to envisage this at the moment but there is definitely light at the end of the tunnel. 

    Warmest wishes, 

    Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

     

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    Hello Adam, 

    I will echo what Chriss who seems to have had a similar experience to you in the past has said. You've done the right thing to reach out here. We are all here for you and wanted you to know that you are not alone, that many of our forum members know exactly how you are feeling. I am so sorry for the loss of your mum it all seems still very raw to you and having lost your dad as well it must have been a really tough time for you. But as Chriss said, keep being strong and listening to that voice that is telling you to carry on, that even though it is hard to think about this right now, life will also bring you happiness, and even though your mum may no longer be around to see you as you said start a family or get married, as Chriss said you will always feel her presence around you and she would undeniably want you to be happy and would be very proud of you for carrying on. 

    If you ever feel as down as you were last night or generally feel low and need to talk to someone, do reach out and as Chriss suggested ring the Samaritans helpline - it is open 24h a day so do keep their number with you and give them a call. You can call them for free on 116 123 and you can also find out about other ways to contact them on this page.

    I think it would also be a good idea to give your doctor a call tomorrow and to mention how you've been feeling, how your grief has been overwhelming. Your GP will no doubt be able to point you in the right direction and for example offer grief counselling. Don't be afraid to mention how you felt last night and how you feel you have reached rock bottom and need help. 

    I hope you feel a little better today and also knowing that you are not alone, that so many on this forum will relate to how you are feeling at the moment. We are all here for you anytime you need to reach out. Keep strong Adam I know it's really hard to envisage this at the moment but there is definitely light at the end of the tunnel. 

    Warmest wishes, 

    Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

     

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