I can't live without my dad - anyone feel the same?

Hi everyone,

 

My father died almost 6 months ago. He was my best friend, my soulmate, my inspiration, my confidant, basically the love of my life. I will never love anyone that way again. He was my other half. We communicated almost every single day in some way (although I have regrets about how I handled this, which I may share another time). The point, though, is this:

 

I don't think I can live without him.

 

He meant more to me than life itself. He was my oxygen, my sunshine, my everything. He was the most remarkable and wonderful human being I have ever known (and will ever know). Every day now I have the pain of realising that he won't ever be with me again. I'm writing this post for one reason: to find other people who feel the same or at least similar.

 

Here are some things that I have NOT found helpful:

 

- People telling me to think about "what he would have wanted". Yes, of course he would have wanted me to go on and live my life. But I don't see how I can live a happy life without him.

 

- People telling me that things "get better in time." Maybe they do, maybe they don't. For some people they actually don't. Some people never recover from the loss of a loved one. He wasn't just a "loved one." He was EVERYTHING to me. And now I have the rest of my life to be WITHOUT him.

 

My love for my father was deeper and more intense than anything else I've ever known. Life feels completely meaningless without him. I have no interest in starting my own family; no interest in meeting somebody; no interest in connecting with others. Without my father in my life, those things don't mean anything to me.

 

The ONLY thing I want is to be with my father again - to wrap my arms around him and never let go. I've never felt love from anyone the way I did from him. He showered me with warmth and love.

 

Does anyone feel the same? 

 

Adam

 

 

Parents
  • I know this is an old post but I feel very much like you!!

    We have just been told my Mum has weeks/months to live and I’m absolutely devastated. Up until Friday we knew nothing.
    we live and do everything together and have the best times and I can’t imagine what life will be like without her. I don’t have my own family through choice/it’s just not happened, so I will be left in our house all on my own. I do have family nearby and friends but it just won’t be the same. I don’t know what to do with myself. Will I be able to cope?

  • My dad had Mesothelioma, which is really just another term for Asbestosis. I know what it is like to know a parent is going to die. My late mother was a stroke sufferer.  I have my daughter, which is a great comfort. I lived with my parents too. We are both having therapy.  I am still struggling really badly with the loss of my wonderful dad, & I am grieving all over again for my equally wonderfu mam.. I hope you get through the loss of your mother when she goes. Take care

  • Thank you so much for your reply, it does make you feel like you’re not the only one!!

    So lovely to have your daughter as support.

    yes I thought I might see someone about it when it happens.

    I am so sorry for your losses!! Life can be so cruel!!

    I hope the therapy works and you too get through this.

    thanks again for your reply

Reply
  • Thank you so much for your reply, it does make you feel like you’re not the only one!!

    So lovely to have your daughter as support.

    yes I thought I might see someone about it when it happens.

    I am so sorry for your losses!! Life can be so cruel!!

    I hope the therapy works and you too get through this.

    thanks again for your reply

Children