Hi there ...

So so sorry your going through this heartbraking time at the moment... nothing really prepares us for that ... all I can say to you, as someone on my cancer journey... make the most of every day .. leave nothing unsaid .. ask her about her life growing up .. I bet there's a lot you don't know ... 

Every time she got cancer and return of it, she somehow pulled through .. that in it's self is amazing , to carry on for all those years, she did see you grow, which as a mum means the world .. my daughter in law friend lost her fight with cancer last year, leaving a 7 and 5 year old ...  cancer doesn't care .. it's really crule ...

But I'm so glad you got those extra years .. though it's never enough ... I was relatively young to loose my mum suddenly from a heart attack and I had no chance to even tell her I was so proud to have had her as my mum .. you have that chance, I never had .. but you know, we don't loose them, just look in the mirror , you are half of her... you will carry her in your heart through your life ... she will see through your eyes...

I know if this cancer takes me, I'll look down and want to see my son's getting on and yet keep me safe in their heart too ...  it's one of the hardest things you'll ever go through in life ... but if you've had that amazing mum, holding your hand growing up, she's given you many lessons in life ... take them with you too .. sending you a vertual hug.... hold on in there ... Chrissie x

Thank you very much, seeing her again and getting over the initial shock has helped. Im just trying to spend as much time as possible with her now, I still have the same feelings of disbelief but I feel like they will stay for a while until it settles in a bit more.

Hi callum 

Chrissie has said most things to you.

If i might add most people have there own way of behaving or reacting in certain sercomstances (please excuse terrible spelling) so thares no right or wrong way to feel or behave.. But certainly be there talk about anything and everything.

Best wishes. 

Billy 

Hi, I saw your post last night but because of the technical issues with the site I was unable to reply. I am 24 and also facing losing my dad very soon. My dad has been poorly for a long time with cancer but has been fighting. We have now been told we don't have a long and that things are declining quickly, As he hasn't been eating for 12 weeks. The only thing we are finding any comfort in it ensuring that we respect his wishes, look after him and get him everything he needs.

I have thought many times about the future without my dad here, I've become very upset when I think about it. But for now I have decided not to think about that and focus on what's happening today. For the last week we have been concentrating on taking everything day by day and not rushing off into the future. I know how hard this is when there's so many things that we just haven't done yet and they haven't been able to see. Your mum I'm sure wouldn't want you to be worrying about that, However I completely understand.

I have decided I'm going to make sure that everybody I meet I will tell about my dad and how strong he was in front of his cancer. Even now when we know he's saying he's trying every single day to be here with us a little bit longer. 
 

I know everybody says it, but I think it's true. Try and enjoy every day every minute with your mum, Say whatever you need to to make sure you don't ever have any regrets. But be true to what you are and your mum. People tell me to tell my dad how much I love him and even hugs and kisses, but that's not him I think he would think I've gone a bit crazy if I started to do that.

Say whatever you need to to make sure you don't ever have any regrets. But be true to what you are and your mum. People tell me to tell my dad how much I love him and he hugs and kisses, but that's not him and I think he would think I've gone a bit crazy if I started to do that.

Please take care and keep in touch, make sure you're taking a bit of time for yourself as well though and having some walks in the fresh air even just for 10 minutes to clear your head.

please take care and keep in touch, make sure you're taking a bit of time for yourself as well though and having some walks in the fresh air even just for 10 minutes to clear your head.

liz x

Hi Callum,

I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this at such a young age. You will probably think I am lucky that I was 31 and my dad 58, but as a child no matter what age the pain is still the same.

I was pregnant at the time my dad went to sleep last year, the baby came along 2 weeks later. To know he would never meet his first grandchild and see me get married (pulled forward because of him) was truly devastating, but I did get through those times, somehow.

I know that I cried so many tears before he died, in fact probably many more before with the anticipation of what was going to happen, when, how and having absolutely no control over it.

Life without them is never ever the same, but I promise you day by day it does change.

Have no regrets, spend as much time as possible together, hug, say I love you, make these days special for her even if its with a lovely bunch of flowers.

At the beginning when we found out I founf myself distancing from my dad as I was so scared to cry in front of him and upset him, but once I had done that and broken down the barrier we hugged and cried together.

Thinking of you

Hi Sunshine1987,

I have to say that was such a lovely reply to Callum. What a horrible time it is for all of us.

Chris

I have just lost my mum a few days ago, I am 21 and can completely relate. 
 

It's heartbreaking and nothing will prepare you, all you can do is stay strong and please make as many memories as you can and take plenty of photos, they become so precious. 

I hope you manage to find some peace, i am still searching myself but I truly believe one day I'll feel it again. 

Hi Jasmine,

I hope things can get better for you and I hope you have some support. I realise it is a very sad time for you

Chris

Hello, the last week has been hard but seeing my mum has been good but im sorry to say she passed away on friday just after me and my dad visited, she was mostly asleep but was conscious a few times and I held her hand and I know she knew it was me and that I love her even though she couldn't speak too well. It came sooner than expected and I'm sad that we werent there when she went. We were going to go and visit later because we knew she didn't have long but 15 minutes before leaving to visit again we got the call to say she had passed. This will be hard to get over but I know that she would of been thinking of me and my dad and she would of been at peace. 

Thank you very much for your help.

My thoughts are with you ... you did good ... I'm sure your mum will be very proud of you both ... sending a vertual hug.....   another angel has found her wings ... Chrissie xx