O.dear you certainly been put through the mill there and 75 isnt so old now ime 65 and ive had biopsie sepsis then back in with hi white blood count had to look up my problem go back to gps and suggest what it was and it was .i lost my partner 18 months ago with cancer misdiagnosed to so it was to late ive been in for majore surgery and they were going to send me home without any follow up care .so i can understand your frustraition and pain i had to say no your not sending me home ime not well enough .theres a dept at every hospital called p.a.ls they are independant and will investigate for you at least you can get your anger across so you woant be consumed by anger .its agony loosing a loved one without you having that .but you know cancers like that its not like they portray in the tv commercials it hides and spreads very difficult to locate as it can be just a few cells .then it can suddenly grow with great speed .sometimes it can be fatel to give chemo if your two ill but have a think contact pals as you seem to have been treated poorly in my oppinion of caurse .was your dad in good health before have you got support yourself you need to care for yourself now as i think grief is a form of illness its hard to cope on your own but trust me it does get eisier in time a bit of counciling can help wish i could take your pain away but please keep coming and chatting otheres will be along your not alone on here there are maney otheres going through this or have been like me and just to know your not alone can help you may have questions that we may have had answerd and can tell you but we are not professionals we are just like you .paul

Thank you for your reply I did actually have bearevment counselling for 2 months but to now the truth it didn’t help now I feel like I’m going though grief again as my Aunt is now in a hospice and she hasn’t got long to live I read on line that the Mc Milan nurses don’t like giving oxygen to patients as they believe that the cancer needs oxygen to spread and if they give a patient oxygen basically it’s helping the cancer to spread well I disagree as the patient has stage 4 cancer anyway and we know there going to die eventually so why not give the patient oxygen to give them a comfortable death not to suffocate to death that’s why I argued with the drs and nurses for 3 days for my dad to have oxygen but through my persistence he did receive it my Aunt on the other hand is comfortable I think the Hospice she is at has a good reputation I want to visit her but I don’t think my mum will like it I wanted to help before and was refused not my my aunt but my mum she sees it as interfering rather than caring this is a awkward situation for me because I know my mum and even though I’m 56 my mum always interferes with my plans and I want to see my aunt while she’s still alive if I go on my own accord my aunt will tell my mum and even though my aunt will be happy to see me my aunt will tell my mum and it will cause anger and upset between me and my mum 

what would you do ?