Cancer Research UK main site
  • Replies 6 replies
  • Views 318 views
  • Users 0 members are here

The fear

Tatties
Offline

Morning everyone

my passed away 2 weeks tomorrow. Sounds like such a long time when I say it, don’t think it feels real. I still don’t feel anything, apart from at night. That’s when I get the fear, think about mum, can’t sleep. She was 53 when she died of stage 4 lung cancer. Her mum (my nana) was 45 exact same diagnoses. I am petrified I am going to get it. I stopped smoking on Friday, haven’t had one since but I keep thinking I’m 32 what if it’s already started. Is there tests that can be done for the genes? I had the cold start of August for weeks, then I got a tickly throat and it won’t shift - all sorts are going through my head, silly maybe. 

  • Offline

    Hi tatties,

     

    I'm sorry for the loss of your mum. Mine died 12 weeks ago and I still cant believe it, doesn't seem real.

    I have the same worries as you regarding my health and would advise that you speak with your GP.

    My dad died of a sudden heart attack aged 53 and my mum of a sudden brain haemorrhage aged 74. Mums postmortem showed evidence of historical heart attacks and advanced heart disease, something she was completely unaware of and with no symptoms.

    I told the GP that I am scared for my health as a result. She told me that there are no tests as such that they would recommend doing and said the main thing is to keep my stress to a minimum, watch my diet, do regular exercise and limit my alcohol intake.

    I've never been a smoker unlike my parents who probably smoked for 20 plus years in their younger years.

    Your GP can tell you if they can test for the ailments suffered by your mum and nan.

    Cheryl x

  • Offline

    Well done to stop smoking maybe the hardest time theres smoking clinics run by nhs you go every week and they check your carbon monoxide levels i think you can get checked to see if you have the gene but smokings the worst but i read even if you have it theres theres only a 25 percent chance and thats cut drasticaly by stopping smoking and eating healthy something we see to have lost the art of .having said that .hey ime realy sorry your going through this .might i suggest you make a double appointment with gp and go and tell them your worry as you dont need that on top of grief .bit of counciling may realy help to .if you read some posts some posts about feeling and seeing things after loss it may give you some comfort lots of people report strange things after a loss not bad things nice things .paul

  • Offline in reply to Paulus

    Hey Paul

    yeah I think I should do a double appointment, my tickly throat is starting to go away now and I know it’s from the cold I had back at the start of August that only shifted about 2 weeks ago but still can’t get the gene thing outmy mind. I’ve been trying to read a bit about it tonight. Still not had a cigarette since Friday lunch time, yesterday and today I only needed 1 bit of nicotine gum, makes me wonder why I smoked for 17 years when I’m not even bothered about it!! 

  • Offline in reply to Tatties

    I smoked for 50 years for me it was a nightmare lol but been stopped seven years so youve cut your chances unmeasurably the oncologist called it lifes choices when her daughter enquired about her worrys and its its  liz smoked like a chimney tillwe met then she stopped pluse alcohol she didnt need it anymore few slips .so you see you need to stop worrying about it and the only way your going to do that is by talking to an expert but if you feel yourself slipping enquire about the  stop smoking clinic there pretty good and genraly they are great to talk to .you keep coming on here and chatting we all have questions about loss and are we ok and theres many wise people on here that can help .paul

  • Offline in reply to Paulus

    Can imagine it being tough but you managed!! :)

    you’ve made me feel much better Paul thank you, no doubt speak soon :) 

  • Offline in reply to Tatties

    Yes come on and chat  theres lots will help with advice and just a virtual shoulder to lean on we all need it know matter how tough we are.paul

Speak to a nurse

Quick links

Follow us

Registered with Fundraising Regulator (logo)
Cancer Research UK is a registered charity in England and Wales (1089464), Scotland (SC041666), the Isle of Man (1103) and Jersey (247). A company limited by guarantee. Registered company in England and Wales (4325234) and the Isle of Man (5713F). Registered address: 2 Redman Place, London, E20 1JQ.