My mum passed away 11 April 2017

my mum was was our mum, with 3 girls. My dad was dad. 

They both worked along to help us achieve. 

Mum was a quiet woman. Looked after us 3 girls while dad worked away. 

In 2016 mum had chronic tummy pains. She had just come back from seeing my youngest sister in the Us.  Obviously with dad. 

She was in bed for at least 7 days  as she wouldn’t let us call an ambulance or doctor. 

I did on the 7 day. She had a life saying operation which was 50/50. She survived. Thankfully.  Was in intentensive care for about 10-14 days.  

She came home about 6 weeks later and was doing great 

then was told she would be have the cancer tablets for stomach cancer  but all would be ok  

when she had healed started 

 cancer drugs about Nov Dec 2016  

 

She was fine until last couple of months  up to Christmas 2016.  I helped her with dinner Christmas Day. But I knew things were not right. 

She was a&e Christmas Eve.    Which I did not no at the time. Went back again on 30  december  2016 This is after finishing the chemo tablets. 

She didn’t come out until the 3 January 2017. 

While in a&e we were told they could not do any more for her. Only palliative care.

She came home and we looked after her. Seeing her slowly deteriorate and died on the 11 April 2017   

I am beside my self with grief hate denial. How should I cope. It’s nearly 2 years now.

  • Hello there its not somthing you get over in six months nathan it depends on each person but if your struggling a trip to gp may help have you had any concilig or joined a bereavement group i think theres a bond between childre and mums dads never get mum is god in the eyes of a child she feeds you does everything to bring you up . Dads its just diffrent have you told him how you feel he must be suffering imensly to best wishs paul

  • Hi. 

    You're not alone. I lost my mum in December 2012 and as my dad worked full time, I brought up my 4 year old sister. I'm 21 now and have moved away to university as I couldn't bring myself to do it for ages, leaving the family etc. It's my mum's birthday on Saturday (16 Feb) and it'll be the first time I've been away. I feel so *** recently, up til 5am just thinking and going over everything we've done together. It's awful and it's not something I feel I will ever get over or something that ever gets easier. I guess you just learn to deal with it in your own way. How you hide emotions. Everyone always says to me "you're always smiling", "I've never seen you upset" but inside I'm crumbling to pieces. I just don't show it. A smile is the perfect way to hide anything because people never ask. My problem is I bottle up my emotions and don't talk about it and so I get myself worked up. Everyone deals with loss and grieves differently I guess