Hi Melissa.  How are you doing? Iam finding it even harder. Went to my Mum's bank today to  deal with 'things'; it was extremely upsetting. Being given a copy of her accounts with variouys figures next to  them devoid of emotion contrasts hugely with the reality of my feelings. Yes, it is a necessatiy but it so hurts.

Have you started any outside help yet?

Lewis

Hi Lewis,

I’m not doing great. An old friend told metoday by text that ‘they are not comfortable with my level of grief ‘ which was nice. Decided to cut her out of my life completely. I had to deal with all that you’re going through and it’s so tough, I’m sorry. I’m still dealing with some of it like the TV licence. I couldn’t find a bill with the account number and they refused to look it up so what can I do? I said take my Mum to court for not paying and hung up. Bureaucracy sucks. I hope you find a way through it. I have counseling set up for next Thursday with a proper psychiatrist. I’ll let you know how that goes. Take care.

Hi Melissa. Yes, it does suck. It is so hard to think clearly when your emotions are in disarray, to put it mildly. Sorry your friend isn't helpful. Hope your Counselling helps you.

Speak with you soon

Hi again, just wanted to say sorry to read about the text from your friend....we're all individual and so is our grief. None of us can understand 100% of what each of us is going through but having to go through the same awful journey, after losing our mum's, we have some understanding. It is hard and stopping the tears even harder.

Rules and regulations over personal data mean it can be trying at the best of times dealing with companies, I found this address if you wanted to write and advise rather than speak to them:- Customer Services TV Licensing Darlington DL98 1TL

I hope that everything goes well for Thursday.

x

Hi Linda,

Thanks for replying and the advice and info. It’s funny how people on here that I have never met are more supportive than some of my ‘friends’. As we know you can’t imagine the pain until you’ve experienced it. Hope you’re doing ok.

best,

Melissa xo

Hi everyone. I’m new to the forum. Actually never wrote in a forum before in my life. I’m 25, just lost my mum 5 weeks ago to lung cancer, it was a long and tough battle & she fought so well. She declined very rapidly after she seen me get engaged on Xmas day. I was okay at first but now it’s really hit me and I’m struggling to get through the days. The images of her still haunt me as her death was very graphic and I feel cheated as we never got to say a last goodbye or love you. I know she loved me but I feel like I haven’t had real closure as it all happened so fast and I was so naive about it all, I wish someone could of told me what to expect or that I had talked about it with her beforehand. Anyway I’m not too sure what I’m expecting to come from writing this but I feel like I’m a bore to my friends as they aren’t in my shoes and don’t know what to say. Thanks for lending me your ears. Em

I can feel your pain. I lost my mother in 2015 in a car accident. She was the love of my life and life without her is painful and hard. Even after 4 years since she passed away, I miss her every single moment. I am from Hindu culture and I  don't believe in death, the soul never dies, it is just the physical body is gone back to its roots but the soul is around us in a different form. You just need to feel the energy of your mother's soul. Just pray for her soul and cherish the memory you have with her. She might be gone physically but her memory is still alive with you so live with her memory. you don't need to feel she is gone,  you are part of her and she is alive in you. 

Hi Melissa. Not been on for a little while. How are things with you? I wish I could say that I am feeling a bit better but I'm not really. I have had four counselling sessions which seem helpful at the time but when I leave nothing seems to  have changed.  Perhaps it takes time to  start working. Also, I had my first birthtday without Mum which wasn't great.  Just try and keep plugging away.

Hopw you are seeing some improvement,

Lewis

Hi Lewis,

Still not great. I had my first birthday without my Mum too and we had the same birthday. I visited her grave on the day and that was extremely sad for me. I’ve had 2 counseling sessions and same here, helpful at the time but go back to feeling the same way a little after. Sorry you’re still feeling sad too. I’m not sure if I’ll ever feel better