So sorry to here of your loss I have just lost my husband also he was 51 he died in 4 weeks of being diagnosed.I'm the same as you wake up and just want him back.all I can advise at the moment is you can only take it one day at a time it is small steps from now on and take care of yourself your grandchildren will be such a comfort to you and it sounds like they live near by.

                                   Best wishes Debbie

Thank you Debbie, this is so hard going alone in the world we did everything together, my husband always put his family first we turned to him when we all needed advise,I look at his empty chair and it breaks my heart all the time , you must be feeling the same at 51 that was no age to go I thought my Alan was young at 67 years, I hope we can both get thru this Xmas at this moment don't feel like doing anything not even putting up a tree, but have my two little ones to think of and its there time in life now have to be strong for them, yes one of my grandsons love really near me see him everyday he used to sit on my husbands knee and be so content , now he will never know him. Thank you for writing wanted someone to talk to xx

Thank you Debbie, this is so hard going alone in the world we did everything together, my husband always put his family first we turned to him when we all needed advise,I look at his empty chair and it breaks my heart all the time , you must be feeling the same at 51 that was no age to go I thought my Alan was young at 67 years, I hope we can both get thru this Xmas at this moment don't feel like doing anything not even putting up a tree, but have my two little ones to think of and its there time in life now have to be strong for them, yes one of my grandsons love really near me see him everyday he used to sit on my husbands knee and be so content , now he will never know him. Thank you for writing wanted someone to talk to xx