Cancer Research UK main site
  • Replies 25 replies
  • Views 8813 views
  • Users 0 members are here

I miss my mum so much. When will it get easier?

Lucyx
Offline

I lost my beautiful Mum to stomach cancer just over a month ago. The pain just keeps getting worse and I miss her more everyday and I can't believe that I'm never going to see her ever again. I literally can't bare it.

This will also be my first Christmas I've not spent with her and I'm dreading it, as is the rest of my family.

When will things get easier?

 

Parents
  • Offline
    Hi Lucy i'm sorry about the loss of your mom. It takes time to come to terms with this kind of loss, and a month is no time at all. It's so very hard when we're grieving for a loved one, sometimes our feelings can feel unbearable, but it's something we all haveto go through. Just take each day at a time, don't think about tomorrow. Just allow yourself to "be". There is no set time on these feelings, but i pomise you that you will learn to live with your feelings in time. I get the feeling you're still quite young, if you have siblings, spend time with them, because that helped me alot when my mom died. If not then anybody that knew your mom that you can share your feelings, memories with. And talk lots if that's what you feel you need to do. It really does help. Love to you and your family x
Reply
  • Offline
    Hi Lucy i'm sorry about the loss of your mom. It takes time to come to terms with this kind of loss, and a month is no time at all. It's so very hard when we're grieving for a loved one, sometimes our feelings can feel unbearable, but it's something we all haveto go through. Just take each day at a time, don't think about tomorrow. Just allow yourself to "be". There is no set time on these feelings, but i pomise you that you will learn to live with your feelings in time. I get the feeling you're still quite young, if you have siblings, spend time with them, because that helped me alot when my mom died. If not then anybody that knew your mom that you can share your feelings, memories with. And talk lots if that's what you feel you need to do. It really does help. Love to you and your family x
Children
  • Offline in reply to nicky74

    Hi Lucy,

    As Nicky has so rightly said a month is no time at all. I know when I lost my mother over ten years ago just after Christmas, it took a few months for it to sink in. At first it just doesnt seem real;more like a very bad dream. I'll be honest with you Lucy, I dont think we ever completely get over losing a loved one for it leaves a big hole in our lives.

    But just as Nicky has said, we do learn to adjust to a new way of life. It mat not work for you just yet but one of the things that has helped me when I feel low, is to remind myself of the many happy times we shared.

    I also lost my dad last year so I know how you feel about Christmas. 

    Sending best wishes and kind thoughts your way, Brian

  • Offline in reply to nicky74

    Hi Nicky,

    Thanks for your advice. I'm only 22 and I shared a wonderful, close relationship with my Mum. She was my Mother and best friend, and it's just so hard not being able to talk to her or see her. I miss her so much.

Speak to a nurse

Quick links

Follow us

Registered with Fundraising Regulator (logo)
Cancer Research UK is a registered charity in England and Wales (1089464), Scotland (SC041666), the Isle of Man (1103) and Jersey (247). A company limited by guarantee. Registered company in England and Wales (4325234) and the Isle of Man (5713F). Registered address: 2 Redman Place, London, E20 1JQ.