I miss my dad so much.

Hi everyone,

I don't really know where to start.. I'm 26 and my dad was 65 so no age and . I lost my best friend, my hero, my rock at the beginning of September the week my son started primary school.. we had the toughest summer.. dad was initially diagnosed in 2012 with advanced prostate cancer with it spread to the  bones and lymph nodes.. but was hormone receptive until beginning of last year so we did have a good run up until that point.. last year he came to live with me , my husband and our 2 kids as he stared chemo as things weren't working out with my mother.. anyway the chemo in itself was an emotional rollercoaster which we didn't really anticipate as we were thrown into the deep end so to speak. It was  heartbreaking to watch him struggle to then get through 10 cycles for it To not have done anything.. end of July  this year it had gone  to the liver, behind the abdomen wall, urea that and growing in the lymph nodes.  it was everywhere and we was told a few short months in August if he didn't start chemo.. well he went in for a routine op 4th August for kidney stents and he never came out of hospital. Meaning he never had the chemo.. . he developed pneumonia and again which he fought with incredible strength, had a stroke and has full left side paralysis.. and day by day travelling to the Royal Marsden in Chelsea watching him slowly waste away and deteriorate is something that has massively effected me especially as the stroke had effected him mentally so he wasn't always my usual dad :-( ... then he was transferred to his local hospital which is when he really took a turn for the worst and the palliative team got him into a hospice on the weds as we was unresponsive and he passed on the Friday.. my world fell apart.. I've dealt with it all majority on my own with my brother and I just am not coping with him not being here, not talking to him, my kids not seeing him or making anymore memories... it's obviously still so raw but it's just genuinely breaking my heart... the emotional waves I get are so overwhelming where I physically cannot stop the tears.. the hospice has been great and are putting us in touch with grief councillors but I guess I was just after some advice or experiences of anyone unfortunately having to go through this utter rubbish time.  

Sorry for the long post but I guess that's the first time I've really reflected on the last 8 or so weeks.

 

xx

Parents
  • Amy I feel your loss - it’s like a chunk of you has been taken away - only to be filled with other feelings. You will never forget your Father. I lost my lovely Dad to cancer 16 April 2009. I still hear his final breath. I do think though that my Dad would never like to see me unhappy especially at losing even him. Think that the more you accept that he is no longer with you the more he will move on too. Love
  • I miss my dad so much we had lots of special times together just me and him he was so lovely and I was his favourite because I was the most loyal and he looked after so many times he was only 64 when he died and I was there with him he as taken far too soon and I will never ever get over losing him he was my world cancer is evil and has no boundaries I've had 2 different kinds myself @ 34 and survived I just wish so much that my dad did
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  • I miss my dad so much we had lots of special times together just me and him he was so lovely and I was his favourite because I was the most loyal and he looked after so many times he was only 64 when he died and I was there with him he as taken far too soon and I will never ever get over losing him he was my world cancer is evil and has no boundaries I've had 2 different kinds myself @ 34 and survived I just wish so much that my dad did
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