Lost my amazing mum to single cell lung cancer yesterday

I lost my amazing mum who was 63 yesterday, I feel so numb and wonder if this feeling will every go away. All she wanted to do was enjoy her retirement with my dad which hurts so much.

She hard vertigo for 3 weeks which was diagnosed as vestibular neuritis. She suffered with extreme dizziness and nausea in the back of our minds we were hoping and praying it wasn't anything sinister.  On Monday her symptoms had increased and an ambulance was called. A tumour was found on her cerebellum which was large. By Tuesday we knew she had an operation to remove hopefully all of tumour. On Wednesday she was going to have surgery. But in the morning she became drowsy. They had ordered CT scans and were waiting for this before starting operation. My dad got a call to say that we had to come in quick. She had a tumour on her lung that had spread to her liver. The brain mets were secondary cancers. They couldn't operate and she died in the afternoon. It was so quick we are inconsolable. 

Parents
  • I am truly sorry for yours and your families loss. I understand that pain you're feeling now, it's suffocating and feels like you must be the only person in the world who felt like that. And in some ways you are. You were the only person to have that exact relationship with your Mum, it was unique to just you two. I remember when my Mam died thinking how are people just living life as if nothing has happened. It felt unfair and unjust. The pain was real and physical. You're not alone but there is nothing that will help you through this time. But take comfort where and when you can. Let friends love you, cook for you, tidy for you. Whatever people want to do, let them. The grief will never go away. It stays the same, but your life adjusts around it. The harder the grief, the greater you loved. I'm so sorry for you. Sending love xx

Reply
  • I am truly sorry for yours and your families loss. I understand that pain you're feeling now, it's suffocating and feels like you must be the only person in the world who felt like that. And in some ways you are. You were the only person to have that exact relationship with your Mum, it was unique to just you two. I remember when my Mam died thinking how are people just living life as if nothing has happened. It felt unfair and unjust. The pain was real and physical. You're not alone but there is nothing that will help you through this time. But take comfort where and when you can. Let friends love you, cook for you, tidy for you. Whatever people want to do, let them. The grief will never go away. It stays the same, but your life adjusts around it. The harder the grief, the greater you loved. I'm so sorry for you. Sending love xx

Children
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