Mum passed away sunday 29th may. Its been almost a week and i dont feel anything. I just feel extremely tired, i havent gone home yet and dont feel ready to face reality. How do i make myself believe shes gone?
That is very strange she passed away just 15 minutes later. My dad is also registering mums death today. Are you going to see your mum in the funeral home beforehand?
Wow, what coincidences! No, I'd rather not. Very much wanting to remember her before all this as cancer totally robbed us of her in the end and I don't want to think of her that way.
That said, I know a lot of people find solace in going so I think doing whatever feels right for you is the right decision xx
It must be really difficult juggling everything. I don't have kids yet but know my brothers found it really difficult balancing home life with everything going on with our Mum and now again looking after our Dad as he's now poorly. I hope you have some good support around you.
I was the exact same with the funeral home but I think because I felt the night my Mum passed was such a blur I was annoyed I didn't take the as much time to sit with her afterwards so In the end I did go and see her. It was a surreal experience but I also found it quite peaceful, I chose a nice outfit for her (instead of the pjs she passed in which she hadn't liked!) and I was glad that I'd had the chance to see her again. Maybe Ask the funeral home what they think because the one we used said that if they felt it wasn't right in terms of how she looked, they wouldn't have let me see her.
I'd really recommend counselling if you can. It's definitely helping me to process things and having someone neutral to talk to means you can just talk freely and not worry about any judgement!
I hope your Mums funeral goes as well as it possibly can and you can smile thinking of her, in amongst your pain.
My mum who was my best friend died only three months after diagnosis so I understand how devastating it is.
I think at the moment you are shock as what you have just been though is unimaginable trauma. Believe me, the next few months you are going to go through waves of different emotions. The only advice I can give you it just to get though each day at a time and don't think anything beyond that. As for visiting your mum, although initially I was scared, I never wanted to feel scared to be with my mum regardless of the circumstances so I went and it brought me alot of peace during the hour we had with her and I was so glad I went.
