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Looking4help
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Hi Forum,

Just 4 weeks ago me and my boyfriend found out that he has oesophageal cancer, then 3 weeks ago we were told it was advanced at stage 4, had spread to lymph nodes in his neck and also to the liver. The consultants words were "we can't cure it but we can give you a better quality of life".

So he's due to start chemo next week but these last few weeks have been battle after battle.

He's only 32 and I'm 30. I'm terrified and have become his full-time carer with what feels like little advice and knowledge about this horrible disease taking over my boyfriend's body. Someone please help with advice or share your stories.

X

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    I am sorry to hear your news- and I wish you strength- its so hard my husband who is older than you but only 50 is also diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer- and we have been through despair to trying to be strong and accept and fight and enjoy our times together- and we have had some great times and I am now focused on keeping up my husbands strength and spirits- we are making plans and doing what we can- and he had his first chemotherapy one week ago - and to date he has had limited side effects and we managed a good day of meeting a friend for lunch- however since I have been home and he is asleep I have felt so sad - sad at silly things like having to get the bus back and not being able to stop off for a drink or shop on the way home - I feel like my life can never be the same again - although I do know that as he is well at present this is good and most of the time I am kind of thankful for this but I am feeling just so sad at present. I will be okay when he wakes up - and I urge you to make contact with others- being a carer is not what we expect - and there is likely to be support near you - although I haven't found this as yet locally. I hope that the chemo goes well for your partner - I am happy to stay in touch - and make sure you find time to do things you can enjoy together as much as you can. Take care xxx

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    I'm so sorry to read you post what you boyfriend and you are going though.there loads information on this site about different cancer and treatment and there nurse you can speak to as well.take each day as it comes I know you terrified there is support out there for you and you boyfriend you don't have to do it alone take care .

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    Hello, I've just seen your post Hun, my husband was diagnosed with stage 4 oesophageal cancer in April, it had gone to his lymph nodes also. We waited 5 weeks and he started chemo ECF which was a full day followed by a portable pump 24/7 for three weeks. Then starting the next cycle. He is on his last week of his pump. Which finishes on the 17th October. Then next Friday 21st he has a ct scan with his tattoo ready for Radiotherapy starting on 7th November. I've been so scared, with no one to talk to. (Plenty of people around but no one that seems to care ) But thank fully it is shrinking, how much we didn't ask, just relieved that it is shrinking. If ever you need to talk Hun I'm always here. 

  • Offline in reply to SusanGM
    this site is so helpful in making me see we are not alone - I would welcome contact and supporting others - its so hard and we need to be able to communicate - take care all xx

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