Hi Butterfly,

Well I did a majority of the dishes last night. It took over four hours! that's how many there were. We were out of forks, and we own a lot of forks so that's saying something... :) It does feel better when they're done though.

My family is very small. My Gran, who lives a couple of minutes away, helps whenever she can. She takes Mum shopping, as Mum can't drive anymore. Unfortunately, Gran is going in for a knee operation tomorrow and won't be able to drive for around 6 weeks. My Auntie (Mum's sister), lives 10mins away, but she works a lot (paramedic). I have a Great Auntie (Mum's auntie) and a second cousin who live an hour away, and another cousin in Australia. I am however, very fortunate to have my fiancee's Mum. She's very supportive and helpful. I don't think I could have made it this far without her. She takes my fiancee and I shopping and comes over to offer help with housework, as well as offering financial help when needed. She even drove Mum to radiotherapy once. The only downside is she's a nurse who works, when she should be retired, which takes up a few days of the week and makes her constantly tired. Although I now know how it feels to be tired all the time... You think I do too much? That woman works, cleans her house, walks her dog three times a day and has raised two boys, one of which still lives at home. Add on top of that the once a week taxi-ing she does for us. Talk about Superwoman!

I'm going to make sure I come here once a day to talk to others who understand. I'll probably find it very helpful. Thank you very much for the support, I really feel like I need it.

Linsey xxx

Hi Butterfly89,  Hows your week going how is your dad? thats awfull news about your nan :(  We have just found out that my mums dad has just been diagnosed with Kidney cancer which has also spread to his brain, my sister and I are in a state of shock.

My little girl is only 18 months so far to young to know any thing is going on, im just sad my mum wont see her grown up.

Mum is sleeping more and more, however the radiotherapy she is recieving is working on her breast but in the scheme of things its not much when its in most her other organs.

xxx

Hi again, 

Sorry not replied been a hectic week. 

4 hours for dishes wow! Can see why you needed to crack on with it! That's great you can rely on your fiancées mum to help and offer support, I bet that is really helpful at times. Wow she does do a lot doesn't she, it's surprising how much some people can take on by themselves! How has your week been? 

My dad's not well he's lost over a stone in the past month, keeps soaking the bed with sweat every night, not eating either. Get his results from CT scan in a weeks time..he's worried it's his liver. Xx

Hello again, 

This past weeks been tough! My dad has been unwell, he's sweating every night soaking the bed so my mum's having to change it sometimes twice a night! He's barely eating and has lost a stone within 4 weeks. Hospital has moved his appointment forward so only another week to wait until we get his latest CT scan results he's suspecting it's the cancer in his liver growing...but we'll see! 

So sorry to hear about your Grandads recent diagnosis, another stock to the system. How's your grandad coping with the news? Big hugs. 

I know what you mean, it's very hard to treat cancer when it's spread to other areas...treatment can only do so much. How are you coping? Xx 

Hi Butterfly89,

       I am 19 years old and my mother was diagnosed with lung cancer about a week and a half, two weeks ago. I know exactly how you feel when it comes to feeling angry and the questions of "why?" I cant control who I lash out on and its hard to cope with it because Im not good at expressing myself.

 Any good tips of trying to cope and come to terms with reality of the situation?

Hope your dad gets better xoxo

Hello.

Sorry to hear about your Dad, fingers crossed that things improve.

My Mum has lost a lot of weight in the last couple of months because she wasn't eating. Scary to watch the weight drop off in such a short space of time.

On Friday she was put into a hospice to keep an eye on her pain and medication. She's in constant pain. She's not very mobile at the moment as she's very weak and sore. We're not very well equipped to deal with her lack of mobility right now. We're getting a stair lift, hospital bed, commode and rails outside of the front and back doors. Once these are all installed, then she should be able to come home.

I went to visit her today and she was very confused and agitated. She also has a chest infection. I'm not going to lie, when I first got there, I had to go to another room and have a cry. After that I was more annoyed than upset, because she kept trying to get out of bed to go to the toilet and she has a catheter as she is too weak to get to the toilet. She was told multiple times that should couldn't go but she was very stubborn and persistant. I could see she was frustrated and it was making me frustrated also. I'm taking tomorrow off so I can do some small sewing projects, but I'll visit her again on Tuesday.

Linsey xxx

Hi butterfly89. 

Im so sorry to hear of your sad news, it's just devastating. U and ur family with by in my prayers tonight. I to is caring for my mum with cancer, utaris and stomach cancer. She got her biopsie done last week so just waiting to here her fate, I'm completely heartbroken as she has already fought breast cancer 6years ago, but this time it feels 100 times worse as she is in so much pain. My mum is my best friend and I can't live without her. U are not alone always remember that. Take care xxxx

Hi again, 

Thank you, we will know more on Monday regarding my Dad's situation until then it's a worrying time. 

Definitely, it's always a worry when they lose weight so quickly because you know it's not normal and it's like you're watching them deteoriate. 

How's your mum doing in the hospice? I do hope she's getting enough pain relief and is feeling more comfortable and can return home soon when everything's been arranged and set up for her. I can understand how upsetting it must of been for you to see her when you went to visit her, if of no doubt have been the same. How are the nurses at the hospice? It must be so frustrating for your mum she still wants to be able to do normal every day things must be so hard. 

Xx

Hello Lara,

Thanks for your reply, 

Thank you for your kind and thoughtful words. How old are you? I'm ever so sorry to hear about your mum, how sad. I know it must be a very worrying time for you the waiting around is the worst when you just need answers and to know what your loved one will be facing. It must be terrible seeing your mum in pain, are they able to give her anything for it? It's so hard when a parent is suffering from cancer, they are everything to you, they are like a safety blanket you've had your whole life and it's terrifying to think of that blanket being taken from you...That's how I describe it anyways. Big hugs to you.  Please feel free to come on here any time no matter what if you need to vent etc. Xxx