My husband has been told that his rectal cancer has now spread to his liver and despite chemo/radiotherapy treatment, the bowel tumour has failed to shrink enough to create a margin for successful surgery. Whilst this treatment was taking place, his liver tumour has grown from a 'spot' to a 'significantly sized tumour'.

Now we have to chose between surgery to try & get the bowel tumour, or chemo to attack the liver tumour - literally a life or death decision in our own hands!!

Looks like hubby has decided on chemo, which in itself I imagine is going to be hard-going, however I myself am undergoing investigations for lung problem having just had pneumonia, work 4 days a week on a self-employed basis, have a 15 yr old hormone-fuelled teenage girl & a monster of a 3 yr old boy to also look after...!

I'm trying so hard to stay positive & upbeat to keep everyone's spirits up and a 'happy home' but deep down I'm feeling a crazy amount of emotions...scared for hubby, worried about the kids, financial worries, worries about the future & in the background of it all, worried about my own health - not sure how to cope with it all? I'm already on antidepressants following the death of my dad 12 months ago so not sure where else I turn? X