Hi Lollypop,

Sorry to hear abour your husbands diagnosis. I do understand what a worrying time it is for both of you but once you have a treatment plan in place and it gets underway It will be easier.

Several years ago I was diagnosed with prostate cancer but due to my wife making me go to my GP, It was diagnosed early and have made a good recovery. My brother in law has just finished chemo. His cancer has escaped the prostate and spread to his bones but he has been told many men in his situation are keeping okay.

I wish you all the best, Take care, Brian

Thank you for your reply Brian, it is reassuring to hear from someone with a positive outcome.  We should get the results of the MRI, and bone scan early next week so until then we just have to stay positive.  Thanks again.  Lolly

Hi Lolly,

Thank you for your reply. Brother in law was told they cannot cure his cancer but with luck they should be able to stop it spreading any further. Sister in law has like you been so worried. I remember the waiting time to find out the results of my ct and mri scans and the time seemed to be standing still.

A lot of people try and keep as busy as possible while others read a really good book as this seems to make time go by quicker

Please let us know how you get on, snding best wishes your way, Brian

Hi lollypop

So pleased the lovely Brian has responded to you as he has a wealth of first hand knowledge in this area and is a great forum member.  I really just wanted to add my welcome (and could not resist your avatar picture as it used to be my fave lolly (many moons ago!!).  Brian is right when he says the waiting is often the very worst part of a cancer diagnosis and I hope that once the necessary results are through your understanding about what is happening/treatment/ etc will help answer many questions you and your husband will have.  It might well  be worth writing down your questions to take to the next appointment as we found it helped jog our memory (which was often foggy at such times).  Hope you will find the forum a helpful resource. Regards Jules54

Hi Lollypop,

Just wanted to say I will be thinking of you and your husband and hoping you get good news on Tuesday. Treatment for prostate cancer has improved dramacticly over the last few years so even if they cant operate, they should be able to keep the cancer under control like they are doing with my brother in law.

Take care, kind thoughts and best wishes being sent your way, Brian.

Thank you Brian.  I feel so much better having shared my feelings.  My husband doesn't like to talk about it. "His way of coping I suppose".  I will keep you posted.  Regards Lolly.

Hi Lollypop,

Jules husband was also one who didnt like to talk about his cancer which to me makes it harder for their wives,  I hope Jules doesnt mind me telling you this but I think it's because we men feel that we are protecting our partners by doing this but instead we only increase the worry.

I looked at it this way, when we are diagnosed with cancer, we need to talk openly and honestly and share our feelings with each other for we all need help and support more than ever before.

Take care, wishing you good results, Brian.

Hi Lolly,

Will be thinking of you both on Thursday and hope you can get some relief in writing down your feelings on the forum. I hope you get the best possible news but Brian is right, there are many people who live long lives with Prostate cancer (my Dad was one of them too- he refused treatment (he was in his seventies at the time) and lived till he was 85 so they are many different outcomes.  I know how hard it is not to overthink where you are at at the moment but take it a day at a time and as long as your husband knows he can talk to you if he wants to (I am not sure how often I reminded mine of this - he was probably sick of my voice!!!) you both need time to take it all in.  There are no judgements passed here and I found the understanding of others in similar situations enormously supportive.

As Brian has mentioned in his post (and I am more than happy for him to let others know if it helps') my husband clammed up more or less as soon as he had his diagnosis and was never happy about discussing it with me or anyone else for that matter.  It was for me the most frustrating and hard part of our journey throughout but being able to both vent and chat on the forum when the mood took me gave me an 'outside view looking in' if that makes any sense.  Take care  and sending peaceful thoughts  Jules x

Hi Lolly,

Just read your posts and wondering how you both are travelling?

Big hugs, Kathy x