Hi Sara

I lost my mum 2 months ago. She too was my best friend and I miss her terribly.  I found it very hard being with her at the end. She spent her last 2 weeks in a hospice.  A friend helped me put it into perspective by saying how incredibly honoured we are to be able to spend time with our loved ones on their final journey and to be able to help them and be with them during it.  The tough part for me was that when mum first went to the hospice she was eating, speaking, and to look at her you'd think "how can you possibly be dying" and then 2 weeks later she was bedridden and unconscious.  mum was very pragmatic in her apporach to death and her illness. she faced it full on and every day the Dr would ask her "so where do you think you are on your journey" and mum would always say " i think I'm on the next stage".  It's an incredibly brave way to deal with it but I se now it was about giving mum that last bit of control over the way in which she died.  I respected these conversations and it was upsetting for me to hear her tell people she felt one step closer.  It was hard to see her stop eating and refuse liquids etc, and her last couple of days were quite distressing as she became very agitated.  I had never seen anyone die before so was pretty scared, but the hopsice nurses were great at explaining the process and mum was given a syringe driver at the end which basically meant she slipped away peacefully.  I just held her hand and kissed her head and told her it was ok to let go now.    You will find your own way to deal with it and you will get through it.  It is the time after that is the most difficult. Thinking of you 

Hi Sara

I lost my mum 2 months ago. She too was my best friend and I miss her terribly.  I found it very hard being with her at the end. She spent her last 2 weeks in a hospice.  A friend helped me put it into perspective by saying how incredibly honoured we are to be able to spend time with our loved ones on their final journey and to be able to help them and be with them during it.  The tough part for me was that when mum first went to the hospice she was eating, speaking, and to look at her you'd think "how can you possibly be dying" and then 2 weeks later she was bedridden and unconscious.  mum was very pragmatic in her apporach to death and her illness. she faced it full on and every day the Dr would ask her "so where do you think you are on your journey" and mum would always say " i think I'm on the next stage".  It's an incredibly brave way to deal with it but I se now it was about giving mum that last bit of control over the way in which she died.  I respected these conversations and it was upsetting for me to hear her tell people she felt one step closer.  It was hard to see her stop eating and refuse liquids etc, and her last couple of days were quite distressing as she became very agitated.  I had never seen anyone die before so was pretty scared, but the hopsice nurses were great at explaining the process and mum was given a syringe driver at the end which basically meant she slipped away peacefully.  I just held her hand and kissed her head and told her it was ok to let go now.    You will find your own way to deal with it and you will get through it.  It is the time after that is the most difficult. Thinking of you 

Hi Kathryn

Sorry for the delayed response, thank you for your message.You are so brave stayin with your mum untill ththe very end and you must be so proud of her in the way that she was at that terrible time what an inspiration to you! I guess i have never thought about it in the way that your friend did but i understand that 100% its kind of good that us daughters can give something back to them after all they have done for us over the years.How areyour family now? do you have siblings? did u find the funeral hard?

Hope to hear back from you take care Saraxx