Morning Garf! Thank you, it's such a shock! But they say she has gone downhill rapidly, quicker than expected. Your right cancer does do what it wants and doesn't stop to think about what it leaves behind. Just can't help but think sometimes in the times we live in with all these stupid gadgets etc couldn't people use money for things in life that actually matter? Like finding a cure for this horrid disease!?

I'm sorry to hear you didn't get to visit dad much I guess I'm lucky that I haven't moved and am very near. Wow I don't know that I will be able to take such little time off your very strong!! I have decided that *** them I'm staying off today to spend the day at the hospice, I only get one mum I can get any job.. I doubt it will come to that but f*** them if it does!!

xxxx

Hi Mickied thanks for getting back in touch!

I know I am in shock by the latest news, very hard to take in. I think I somehow always believed she would get better.. She bounced back last year in August when they originally told us about it spreading, they said a matter of weeks then but she was given steroids and that was her stronger until now! Thank you for keeping us in your prayers.. Although situations like this make me doubt there is anything good out there..

I have phoned my work today and told them she's now in the hospice and we've been told a few days.. Will see what happens! I said to Brian about how nice the staff are at the hospice it's amazing! Glad to know she's in such genuinely caring hands!

xxxx

Hi Candy,

Thanks for updating us. Although it is upsetting for you it must be some comfort to know that she is in a place where she will receive the best of care. I don't blame you for taking the day off, for as you so right when said you only have one mother. At times like this, family comes first. I think you will find that she will be sleeping more and more. All you can do is to be there by her side. Just talk to her now and again for even though she may appear to be sleeping, just like my mother she will know you are there with her and it will be of great comfort to her. Take care, thinking of you, Brian.

I completely agree with Brian and family definately comes first.

Thank you for saying you think I am strong for taking a short amount of time off work but I can promise you that I didn't feel strong at the time and I still don't.  I also agree with you that it seems like people and companies can spend an awful lot of time, effort and money on things that don't really matter instead of investing the same things into helping cure diseases like cancer but unfortunately that will never change.  As long as we can carry on raising money to help research and care then there is always hope that cancer will get what's coming to it eventually.

I am at least happy that your Mum is now in a hospice and getting the care and pain relief she needs.  Hospice nurses are a breed apart aren't they?

Sorry for a short reply for now but I am on a course all day today but I will check the site later today.

Look after yourself.

Garf. xx

Hi Candy

My husband always thought his father would beat cancer because they used to sit and joke and laugh where I would have been sitting heartbroken suppose they were all trying to remain positive.

To be honest with you Candy I think I took his passing worse than his own two daughters did.  I would have visited him at home several times a week and brought him fresh cream buns because he had a terrible sweet tooth like myself where they just contacted him over the phone a few times during the week.

You are right Candy about the power of prayer at times like this sometimes I question myself why do these cruel things happen to the good people in this world when you look round at the evil that is going on at present - it does make you wonder.

I have heard from others about the staff at various hospices and how they are completely different to the ones you come across at hospitals and their dedication towards cancer patients.

I will check in on Monday if I get a chance Candy to see how you are.  I will be thinking about you all weekend and stay strong wee friend.

Hugs Candy

Mickied

Hi Garf, Brian & Mickied. My apologies I haven't replied to you In a while have been at the hospice most of the time. Glad to say mum is still with us despite being told she only had a few days left.. Although this doesn't mean I'm under any false pretences, I know it will happen sometime soon but nice to have extra time.. What can I say hmmm thinking of what happened over the weekend?... Thursday night she was a little out of it and sleeping most of the time we were there, this gave us a chance to chat to the nurses and introduce ourselves. Friday I stayed off work and spent the day and night there, she was a lot brighter chatting away to us, much the same on Saturday. Eating all her dinner which is good, as she didn't eat much at the hospital. Sunday she was a bit like Thursday, sleeping on and off. The nurses said she had a rough night, waking up not feeling well etc.. Back to work today so I will go to the hospice tonight and see how she is

Like I said before the nurses at the hospice are great, such a difference to the nurses at the hospital. You can just tell these nurses really care and want to help the patients out. Feel much better knowing she is in their hands. They are very friendly to us and other visitors too and feel you can ask them questions etc! So on the hole everything is much better. And of course I don't want to lose my mum but knowing she will be safe there when it does happen makes me feel reassured..

On the work front I just feel a bit better coming in and keeping some normality for now, yes I'd like to be there all the time for my mum but I don't want to be off when I don't 100% need to be. I have my phone with me and am only 10 mins from the hospice so should anything happen I can be there quickly. I will just try to keep a routine for now and go down the other route when needed!

How are you all keeping?

xxx

Hi Candy,

So glad your Mum is more comfortable now and that the hospice is taking such good care of her.  Also glad that as a result you are feeling a little better too.

Having a bit of a long day as it happens.  As a manager at work I and other managers had to serve food and drink at the Christmas staff party last night.  Not sure giving them a free bar was such a good idea and so there was much drunkeness and potential embarrassment for people to think about today.  The party finished at midnight but with stragglers hanging on I didn't get to bed until 2.30am.  Starting to feel that lack of sleep now but it's home time for me in just a couple of hours where I will try not to fall asleep in front of the t.v.

Have you been able to find out what you are entitled to at work regarding time off?

Garf. x

Hey Garf!

Yeah I'm glad too, makes such a difference when they get good care, can see even she appreciates it! Ha your reply about the office party made me giggle! I bet there is a few sore heads around the office today! Awk go on allow yourself to fall asleep in front of the tv! Nothing better than doing that on a Monday night lol! I will be doing the same when I get back from the hospice!

No I haven't discussed it with my boss yet. I'm thinking I will just deal with it when it comes to that time.. No point stressing over it just now!

Did you have a nice weekend?

xxx

Hi Candy,

Just caught up with your thread and see your Mum is now in a hospice.
I am glad you have come to know the level of care they can give in a hospice.

It's always a worry when one gives an opinion that it might not be right for someone else.

It sounds like your Mum is having some classic ups and downs.

I am glad you got some good moments with her over the weekend, good times to remember later.

Sending supportive hugs to you and thinking of you and your Mum

Annabel. xx