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Continuing the journey

Hi All

Decided to drop the 'month' from the title of this thread as time moves so quickly and the date becomes irrevelant so quickly.

Hubby and I both feeling pretty drained today but not because of his illness. However it is something that has made both us further stressed and 'outside our control'.  Prepare yourselves for a rant or look away now.

Having put in a long work day yesterday (both of us). I switched on my mobile on leaving work to find a message from the social worker for Mum (regular readers of my thread will know what we have been going through recently).  The upshott of this message was that the Social Services panel have decided that they can offer Mum a place at a sheltered housing complex but not the most local one. The call was to advise me of the panel's decision and to tell me that a visit will be arranged this week, preferably by Wednesday, for Mum to be taken to visit the flat and be told about the package of care and how it will work. They require a decision from Mrs K (this is how my mother is addressed in the follow up e-mail!!) by Friday otherwise the placement will be offered to another service provider!  Unfortunately this means Mum has little choice but to move further away (closest sheltered housing has no vacancy and they are  not willing to help fund where she has spent the last 9 months 'settling in').  The guilt I feel at being unable to cope with this is overwhelming, my hubby is very supportive and angry in equal parts and I am dreading the days ahead.  I am unable to take leave and my negative feelings towards her social worker would not work in Mum's favour as she needs to go on the visit with an open mind and the care home staff state she is quite able to make her own mind up.  If she agrees I will be unable to visit as regularly (my problem not theirs of course) but apparently the social worker will accompany her and I have asked to be kept informed.

Even typing this is making me sad/angry/frustrated and emotionally/physically drained.  I was due to visit Mum today but this is on hold until I have spoken to the care home this morning. Hubby says I should leave it till later in the week when we know what is going on and I suspect he is right (bearing in mind my physical upset involves many 'loo' visits (enough said!!)).

Sorry for all the negativity but just needed to get it out and try and get  myself together before I start on the phone calls.

Hope everyone has a good day.  Regards Julesxx

  • Brill news Brian regarding your results and I am sure you will soon be cracking more nuts and planning more books now that the new equipment has arrived.  As the sun was shining this morning, once I had done the washing and ironing (boring but necessary!!) I set off to the local farmers market (treated myself to a large hot chocolate to keep our the chill) and also found a few bargains at the Charity shops for my winter wardrobe and a couple of social events planned (and hopefully attended together) over the next two months.

    Hope you and MrsB have a peaceful weekend. Regards Jules x

  • Hi Mickied

    Absolutely appalling what some lowlife's will try and get money out of people for!!  Leaves a very bad taste in the mouth when innocent people are getting duped in such an outrageous manner.

    Hope your throat does not develop into anything nasty - so many bugs around and some seem to last quite a while.  So far so good

    with me, since taking a short course of antibiotics, no more waterworks problems and last sample was clear .  Having taken Annabel's advice and found some cranberry tablets (before I bankrupted myself on the juice!!) I am now on 1 a day for a month to keep the bugs at bay (hopefully!!).  My GP had recommended cranberry too so heres hoping!!

    Managed my Friday night out and hubby went with his friend to the pub and watched the football (hubby not that bothered but his mate is and they had a couple of hours over a beer/whisky.  Hubby has also begun his physio regime (has exercises to do in his armchair too!!)  and he goes back in two weeks for next session with the physiotherapist.  At least it gives him a reason to get out of the house (consultant wanted him to do more walking but  having always driven everywhere, he rarely walks further than the front gate  which is not quite what she had in mind).

    Wishing you and the family a peaceful weekend. Take care and virtual hugs.  Jules x

  • Hi Hope

    Hope you are enjoying a peaceful weekend and that you and the family are all keeping well.

      Hubby has now got his exercises to do at home (mostly managed within the realms of his armchair!!) and will see the physiotherapist again in a couple of weeks for another session.. He is 'going with the flow' but says he doubts it will make a difference!!  I have been out to the Farmer's Market today (hubby did not want to come with me so I walked there and bussed back (beautiful sunshine for the walk there but then it clouded over) and enjoyed a hot chocolate to warm me up. Also found an outfit for a function we are planning on attending at the end of January (formal do so long dress called for and was very pleased to find an ideal answer in local charity shop - might be last season but it was a bargain.)   Hubby was dozing in front of the fire but has now woken again and has his milkshake and some crumpets to keep him going.  Chat again soon.  Jules x

  • Hello Jo, lovely to hear from you and hope you managed the walk and more importantly the pub lunch (personally I love a ploughmans or a bowl of homemade soup and crusty bread).  Beautiful sunshine here first thing (out by 7.30 to the launderette) and once I had done the ironing I asked hubby if he would like to go to the Farmer's market.  As he didn't I left him in front of the fire/tv and set off for the mile and a half walk.  Really enjoyed the fresh air though did have a large hot chocolate to keep the chill out.  Also did my usual tour of the charity shops and was delighted to pick up a bargain (long dress for a 'do' we are hoping to go to in Bournemouth at the end of January with a group of friends).  All in all a morning well spent.  No plans for the rest of the weekend but am meeting my daughter after work on Monday (hubby is picking up eldest grandson from school) for a quick look around the shops (I can look after the baby/pushchair) if she wants to do a spot of Christmas shopping in peace or we may just go for tea/cakes.   I have also asked my Sister in Law for dinner next weekend (she only lives 40mins away but we have not seen her since early September).  We have few weekends free before the festive season now so am trying to fit things in as and when.  Its very handy than I only work three days a week!! 

    Hope you keeping well and chat again soon (like you I do sometimes read more than I post ). Virtual hugs. Jules x

  • Hi Jules,  Glad you had a productive shop and found a suitable dress - even better when it's a bargain!  Armchair sounds a good place to do exercises this cold weather and I'm sure hubby is happy with his milkshake & crumpets!  I've been catching up with friends this weekend which is nice, tomorrow I have a hospice memorial for Mum, so am gearing myself up for that one.  Emjoy the rest of your weekend.  Hope xx

    Brian, great news about the blood results.  Take care.  Hope xx

  • Hi Jules,

    Sorry I haven't responded sooner but have been to a Macmillan cancer meeting regarding the new drop in centre they are hoping to start work on in January. Pleased to hear you had a small win at bingo last night and have also picked up a bargain today. As I didn't get back until gone two-o-clock, I stopped off and got myself some chips from the shop just along the road. My wife is not supposed to eat them but the smell of them tempted her so much she gave in. They always give me more than I can eat and if I do eat them all myself I always feel rather bloated afterwards so it was good to have her help me out as I can not see them go to waste can I.  Any more than I could see nuts go to waste.

    It has been a lovely sunny day here today although a little chilly. My wife had one of her diabetic turns about four-o-clock this morning so bleary eyed I came downstairs only half awake to get her a cup of tea with some sugar in it and some biscuits and then neither of us could get back to sleep afterwards until it was nearly time to get up. My wife virtually had to prise me out of bed this morning I can tell you. The trouble is although she make a quick recovery usually, she does feel so tired afterwards.

    Glad to hear your husband has got some exercises to do and really hope this helps his shoulder.

    Anyway, as usual I have rambled on too much, Probably a side effect of nut-eating-itus. Do take care Jules, have a relaxing weekend, Brian

  • Morning Hope and Brian

    Have been up a few hours, though did manage a full 5hrs sleep last night so feel quite ready for the day ahead (no plans though so perhaps relaxing by the fire is the best idea as its miserable outside at present).

    Hope,  will be thinking of you as you attend the memorial for your Mum - very emotional for you but a lovely idea for the hospice to arrange these special times.

    Brian, hope your wife is feeling a little better following her diabetic turn.  I am aware that this can leave someone feeling very tired afterwards so expect  you will be having a peaceful day which will aid her recovery. Hope she had (and you too) a better night last night.  It can knock you for six when your lose so many hours sleep.  My Mum often used to get up during the night  and would make herself a milky drink (think she would often finish the night off in her rocking chair with a big blanket rather than trying to go  back to bed - worked for her!!)   Love the idea of her sharing your chips (even if she should'nt) though I am sure she enjoys them just as much as you do but helping you with such a large portion gives her a good excuse.

    You never ramble Brian, its always a pleasure to chat. Kind thoughts and a peaceful day are sent to you and the family.  Jules x

  • Hi Hope,

    Thinking of you this morning for your Mums Memorial service. I hope all goes well with the service and hope you feel positive afterwards,

    Kind thoughts and virtual hugs,

    Annabel. xx

  • Morning Jules,

    Was so glad to hear of your win on the bingo,!!!! and your bargain hunting sucess in the charity shop.

    When I take the local ladies over the Pennines next Tuesday charity shops will be big on the list for 2 of us as there are something like 10 charity shops where we are going.At least 2 of them are cancer research. !!!

    Plus lots of nice non charity shops. Personally I love a bargain.

    hugs

    Annabel. xx

  • Hi Jules and Annabel,

    Thanks for your kind words, I will let you know how the service goes.

    Jules, glad that you managed 5 hours sleep but you are still an early riser.  I hope you have a relaxing weekend by that fire, sounds great.

    Annable, I hope all is OK with you and again wishing you a relaxing weekend.

    Hope xx