Hi Devastated-Mum  I am so sorry to hear about your daughter's diagnosis.  I often think it is much harder for our loved ones to watch us going through it than it is for ourselves.  I have just turned 60 and have stage 4 breast cancer with mets in all bones with spine being the most painful.  It is hard on my husband but I really appreciate it when he tells me how he is feeling (which is not very often).  My cancer is stable with my medication and I have a good quality of life.  I hope it is the same for your daughter.  Have you told your daughter how you feel, you don't have to be upbeat all the time.  Like Anastasia says reach out and hopefully get someone to talk to.  Macmillan arranged counselling for me and perhaps can also arrange something for yourself.  I just wanted to reply to your post.  Sending you hugs.

Lee x

Thank you so much for replying to my post. My daughter and I are very open about our feelings.  I also had breast cancer 5 years ago but I'm in remission so I was very angry when hers spread I felt it should be me I'm 72.. she's 20 years younger and it seems so cruel.

She seems to be coping well with the treatment they changed it a few months ago as her markers had changed but she seems stable now.

She's getting married in July so I'm praying she's going to be okay for that. 

Her bones are very painful and she has had a metal bar/nail put into her humorous as they were afraid her arm would break as the cancer had gone through the bone making it weak.. she says her pain is worse in her pelvis.. she also has lung cancer and gets breathless easily.  I suppose it's just a case of getting through each day and enjoying life as much as you can isn't it.. 

We're all having support from Maggies they are very good.. I have only been once last summer.  

It's nice to reach out and speak to others like yourself.  I wish you all the best for the coming years and thank you again for responding ️