I’m in Norfolk and as much as I have travelled down to London on a regular basis for work, I don’t think that’s an option sadly at the moment. Zoom could certainly work but I guess you don’t get quite the same togetherness feeling from a Zoom call. I’m happy to try though. I’m anxious about the conversation with my daughter and even more anxious about the first few days and weeks without her mum. I’m hoping it is super early to even think about that at the moment, but it’s going through my head none the less. I can and will remain strong for her and be there for her, but that little mind running at a million miles an hour not really being able to process the fact that she won’t see her mum again is the most scariest feeling I’ve ever experienced. 

Hello BM1987

It's so lovely that you are all are finding other people to connect with. We're so pleased that you are all able to support each other.

We just wanted to remind you that as Cancer Chat is anonymous we don’t know who people are and so we would always suggest that if you want to meet up outside of Cancer Chat that you take sensible precautions. You can find out more about how we protect our members' privacy in our terms and conditions, where we advise caution if you want to meet another Cancer Chat user.

If you do choose to meet another user you do so at your own risk and should take common sense precautions, such as taking a friend with you and letting someone know exactly where you are going to be.

These simple precautions aside, we really hope that you will connect with others who are in a similar situation, whether online or in real life.

Best wishes, 
Jenn
Cancer Chat moderator 

Hey Rob, yes I agree, it's not the same but I do feel we can at least try. As hard as it just talking about it, on the other hand I personally feel I'm a going to explode not getting support through talk. So, I can only assume you feel the same. 

And I said the same to my partner yesterday, who loves an hour away so we only see one another once a week. This is another challenge! I said the fact is that my daughter loses her best friend and I don't know how we tell her it's come back and in operable. She loves Christmas and it's her birthday 3 days before Christmas and so we are trying so hard to keep this from her so that this exciting time of year is not ruined every year from now...

as parents we have to be warriors. My sister in law said you have to "fake it" which is good advice although we can't be robots. I can fake it most of the time but just seeing her reminds me of the loss she will feel one day. But then again we aren't here to live forever? Why can't we just accept this and enjoy each moment together. Anything can happen to us at anytime right? That's logic, but our brains are so complex. Our hearts just want to love and protect at least our children. 

Cry where you need to, but then wipe the tears away and focus on making memories that aren't around the misery. We just said yesterday we can't remember always talking about the diagnosis and cancer, we need to fill conversation with joy and good things even though what's at the back of minds is painful. 

What's beautiful is that you're there, and you'll fill that gap. Time will heal, and you will soldier through x