Only yesterday my partner was told she had pancreatic cancer which has spread to the liver. Chemotherapy is an option but to prolong life rather than cure. I have no words to describe how I am feeling at the moment. However, based on the topic of this chat I feel so selfish to be worried, anxious and scared of what the future will bring. We have a 6 year old who will lose her mother and I will lose the person that makes this house what it is today, it won’t be the same without her. I know it’s good to chat to people in a similar position and if anyone is willing or wanting to chat then please reach out. I need it, so I know others will. 

I’m so sorry. What you’re facing is unimaginable, and there is nothing selfish about how you’re feeling. Fear, grief and anxiety are completely natural when the person you love, and the future you pictured, is suddenly at risk, especially with a young child involved.

Thank you for being open and honest. I know your words will help others feel less alone, even if they don’t know how to respond yet.

If it would help, perhaps we could organise a simple, informal meet-up in London, just a safe space to talk, listen, or sit with people who understand. Even a coffee and a walk can make things feel a little less isolating.

You don’t have to do this alone. I can ask my friend if she might be interested? Otherwise a Zoom if everyone is based across the UK? X

I’m in Norfolk and as much as I have travelled down to London on a regular basis for work, I don’t think that’s an option sadly at the moment. Zoom could certainly work but I guess you don’t get quite the same togetherness feeling from a Zoom call. I’m happy to try though. I’m anxious about the conversation with my daughter and even more anxious about the first few days and weeks without her mum. I’m hoping it is super early to even think about that at the moment, but it’s going through my head none the less. I can and will remain strong for her and be there for her, but that little mind running at a million miles an hour not really being able to process the fact that she won’t see her mum again is the most scariest feeling I’ve ever experienced. 

Hello BM1987

It's so lovely that you are all are finding other people to connect with. We're so pleased that you are all able to support each other.

We just wanted to remind you that as Cancer Chat is anonymous we don’t know who people are and so we would always suggest that if you want to meet up outside of Cancer Chat that you take sensible precautions. You can find out more about how we protect our members' privacy in our terms and conditions, where we advise caution if you want to meet another Cancer Chat user.

If you do choose to meet another user you do so at your own risk and should take common sense precautions, such as taking a friend with you and letting someone know exactly where you are going to be.

These simple precautions aside, we really hope that you will connect with others who are in a similar situation, whether online or in real life.

Best wishes, 
Jenn
Cancer Chat moderator 

Hello BM1987

It's so lovely that you are all are finding other people to connect with. We're so pleased that you are all able to support each other.

We just wanted to remind you that as Cancer Chat is anonymous we don’t know who people are and so we would always suggest that if you want to meet up outside of Cancer Chat that you take sensible precautions. You can find out more about how we protect our members' privacy in our terms and conditions, where we advise caution if you want to meet another Cancer Chat user.

If you do choose to meet another user you do so at your own risk and should take common sense precautions, such as taking a friend with you and letting someone know exactly where you are going to be.

These simple precautions aside, we really hope that you will connect with others who are in a similar situation, whether online or in real life.

Best wishes, 
Jenn
Cancer Chat moderator