Fed up with medication, want a break

I'm a 64 year old man, 5 1/2 years since diagnosis for locally advanced prostate cancer.  Two rounds of radiotherapy failed to eliminate it, and since October 2025 I have been back on hormone therapy.   I am otherwise extremely fit.  I resisted the injections, and have been prescribed Relugolix and Apalutimide.  I should be pleased that my PSA level is <0.1, and I have none of the common side effects.  But it still feels like the medics are playing 'Jenga' with me, giving me drugs that rot my  bones and muscles before the cancer gets a chance.    They make passing comments, 'keep you active as long as we can', but I know my brother who died after 10 years of treatment for PC gave up riding a bike as he feared his bones would crumble.   The worst thing is that I have lost my emotional equilibrium - I spend days feeling like I want to cry.  I used to be resilient, and coped with everything.  I coped with the cancer until very recently - and it is not the cancer that is getting me down, its these drugs, and the realisation that I'm stuck on them forever, or until they stop working.   I am planning to give myself a break for a month. [I get a prescription for three months at  a time] - I know the official answer will always be 'you shouldn't' - and I understand why that is the sensible answer - but what will happen if I do take a break?  [I know that 'PC' will almost certainly be in my death certificate - and if taking a month off the drugs from time to time only shortens my life expectancy a little, but cheers me up, I reckon that's not a bad deal.]  Any honest answers out there?