Hi ladies,

I've literally just returned from my second visit to the breast clinic - both times Ive been fine (first time fibroadenomas, this time glandular tissue) and just wanted to reassure you that the vast majority of breast clinic referrals end well, particularly when you are young. The smaller number of positive stories on here dont reflect the true number in real life because many people probably just move on with their lives once they've got the all clear but as I know that awful anxiety too well I thought I'd just reach out. I was an emotional wreck the first time round. I ran every single worst possible scenario over and over and over in my head. I sought out every one of the worst stories I could find and cried over the saddest. This despite knowing several people who HAVE had breast cancer, HAVE been treated, and are out living their perfectly normal long lives. It's completely natural to ignore any reassuring words and focus on the worst but it won't do you any favours for your mental or physical health.

I still very much worried this time round, but I did manage to restrain myself from drowning the kids in my hysterical snot and tears this time. 

My advice would be try and immerse yourself in anything that might take your mind off it - a run, cheesy Netflix shows, a hot Bath. It doesn't help with lockdown piling on the pressure but just do anything that doesn't involve your phone or Google!

also if the doctors have said they don't think it's anything sinister, try your best to believe them. Remember they have felt hundreds if not thousands of boobies, you've only had your own to worry over.

and also be reassured that you've done the most sensible thing possible being checked out. 

I really hope everything goes well for you all, and that you find a way to cope over the next few days of waiting. X

Hi Jessie, 

You are an angel, these are exactly the things I need to be hearing right now. 
I'm really happy you're okay especially having to go twice! 
What you say is exactly what I've been doing, I automatically think the worst and have the worst case scenarios in my head of when they're telling me my results. My husband told me off the other day because he caught me staring at our son and that he knew what I was doing, he was right I was imagining not being there for him to see him grow up, trying to visualise every inch of detail in his face. Ive been trying to shove everything to the back of my mind and to deal with it when the time comes but every so often the thoughts threaten and I've just got this constant heavy sickness in my stomach but I know I have to keep positive! 

I can't thank you enough for your advice this has really helped, whenever I feel the horribleness brewing in my head again I'll be sure to re-read your post and remain positive! I will be sure to update when I know :) xx

Hi [@btroman16]‍ 

I am also in a similar position..

I am 34, had pain in left breast for a number of weeks.. thought nothing of it really until the pain started to be a sharp pain behind my nipple and under my arm. I then had some discharge from my nipple.

I booked straight away to see my GP, he couldnt feel any lumps but sent me for an urgent referral anyway 

Although urgent I would have been waiting 3-8 weeks so I made a decision to go private .. I had my appt in the breast clinic 4 days later.

Again the consultant could not feel any lumps etc. but did notice colour change to my nipple. He wanted me to have a mammogram and ultrasound.

So Tues this week I had a mammogram and ultrasound, she confirmed tissue difference in the left breast I was having trouble with but also said something has shown "suspicious" in the right.

I had 4 biopsies there and then and was told to come back to see consultant next week in person not a phone appt.

Like you I am absolutely up the walls!!!

The waiting is torture.

Trying to keep busy at home in work etc. but like everyone else my mind is in overdrive!! 

Hi Marlee 

oh gosh I'm so sorry to hear that, I don't blame you for going private at all, that would've been such a long wait and like you said the waiting is torturous. 

I really don't like when they use those terms, I know they don't know for sure at the moment but what does suspicious mean!? I know it's hard for them to say anything else but all that does is make us worry what on earth it could be. 
Next week you should definitely have your answer and I've everything crossed for you, I know it's easier said than done and I'm trying to do it myself but we've got this and whatever it is we will get through it! Please will you let us know! Xx

[@btroman16]‍ 

thanks a mil for reply.

of course I will keep you updated x

Hi Tara

I was just wondering did you get your appointment? I'm in Ireland also. My pain started out in my left armpit and radiating into my left breast I was totally freaked out went to out of hours doc twice in the one weekend as my anxiety was spiraling out of control with the worry. I saw my own doctor the Monday and she done a thorough exam and said there were no lumps and put me on 3 months of evening primrose oil. She put it down to mastalgia. I ended up getting physio the last month on my shoulder and under my left arm where the pain was but I think its made it worse! I rang after a month and told her its upsetting me so much every day and she said she would refer me privately. It is costly but I cant live like this hanging over me every day so im waiting impatiently to be contacted and get a mammogram and ultrasound please god. 

I hope you got answers x

Hi there! 
 

I'm so sorry to hear you're going through this! I completely understand how worrying it is!

I had my appointment on Wednesday and thankfully everything went ok. A doctor done a physical exam and then the consultant did one too. They said they didn't feel anything to be worried about but sent me for an ultrasound just to be sure. In the ultrasound the doctor told me that they could see fibrocystic tissue and a few small cysts where I was getting the pain but said that none of it was anything to be concerned about. They also asked me was in taking the evening primrose oil and to be honest I wasn't taking it every day ( which I told them) and they said that sometimes it takes up to three months for the evening primrose oil to have an effect on breast pain.

You definitely made the right decision by going private because the waiting list for public is ridiculous even though it's only fair that they seem to be seeing only urgent cases. It still isn't helping people that are worried about it. I was the exact same as you waking up every day in pain and with a constant fear and worry so I completely get where you're coming from.
 

You should try to ring the private hospital too and put your name down for a cancellation. I know of a girl who was waiting for a private hospital appointment and she rang one morning to see if there was any update on an appointment and they said they had a cancellation for the next day so she took it. It might be worth a shot incase one does turn up! 

I really hope your get an appointment soon so that all this worry will be over for you because sometimes the worry is the worst part of it all. Please let me know how you get on or if there's anything else I can answer. 
 

Xx

Thank you so much for replying and I am delighted to hear it was nothing sinister in your case! I've been on evening primrose oil for a month I havnt found it working yet so please god it will take effect soon. 

I will definitely ring them and see whether they have cancelations and get a sooner appointment. 

I will update here as soon as I get seen and hoping and praying I will be ok just like you.

Can I ask do you feel completely relieved now or is there a small part of u still concerned. I had this discussion with my husband and he said I can see you still not been convinced even if they tell you everything is fine. I am in my early 30s with 2 small kids and suffer desperately with anxiety as it is so the what ifs are always lurking there in my mind. X

No worries at all. Definitely keep taking the evening primrose oil as they told me it can take a while to have an effect. It's definitely worth it to see if they have a cancellation so that you'll be seen quicker and that way you'll have answers.

For me, when I came out of there I was just so happy that it was all over. I spent a lot of time being worried and feeling the bump In my breast thinking the worst and it turned out that it was just the fibrocystic tissue and small cysts so being told that it was nothing to worry about definitely eased my mind. I did find that over the last few days when I get pains I'm automatically thinking I can't wait to be seen but then I tell myself that I've been seen to and everything is ok. I think since it's been going on 5 months for me I feel like I'm still waiting on an appointment but I just keep telling myself that it's after being checked. 

I think once you get some sort of answers you'll have an easier mind because the whole not knowing of it all is over. Sometimes I thought the not knowing was worse because you're automatically going to think the worst. I generally overthink the smallest of things so I get where you're coming from but once it's done you'll have a peace of mind I think. 

please update when you've been seen and try to keep yourself occupied  and take your mind off of it (easier said then done I know) but sometimes I found that thinking too much about it definitely didn't help. I'll say a prayer for you! 

 

x