Hi Janeylou. I know how you feel. I'm 51 and received a recall letter on Christmas Eve (great timing) saying an abnormality was found on my first screening mammogram. My clinic appt is 5 Jan and I can think of nothing else at the moment. I'm trying to keep distracted. My teenage daughter and husband saw me open the letter but I haven't told my teenage son or anyone else apart from my best friend. Kind of want to know what is actually the outcome before I worry other people. Will tell my boss (she is lovely) though as need time off work for the appt. My Mum and her mother (so my maternal grandmother) both had breast cancer. My grandmother died years ago from another cancer in the end and my Mum is doing fine, four years on. I had three (one per year) mammograms up to the age of 50 on the familial screening programme (which were all clear)but the last one was nearly two years ago (I'm 52 in February). When I  had the recall letter last week I then took a close look at my breasts as I hadn't noticed any lumps (I am a bit rubbish at checking though) and was horrified to see a considerable area of dimpling/puckering under my left inner breast - quite obvious lines and indents when I raise my arms. I have no idea how long they have been there as I don't go around with my arms in the air staring at my boobs Kind of wish I had now though. I can really understand what you are feeling and the waiting is awful as every scenario goes through your head. All I can say to you (and me!) is that most cases referred aren't cancer so let's hold onto that thought!! Good luck for tomorrow. X

Hi Kiwirunner, just wanted to let you know....my circumstances very similar to you, age 53 years, referral letter arrived the day before Christmas Eve.....not sure how I've got through Xmas as no extended family around to keep me busy as usual, due to their health issues (my sister has secondary breast cancer) Just myself, hubby and teen daughter, who, as you, saw me open referral letter, which I managed to play down.

Attended my appointment first thing today (my birthday) I was told that there was a change in one of my breasts so I had a more detailed mammogram and an ultrasound. After the ultrasound the consultant told me that I am absolutely fine and can go back to three yearly mammograms. 
 

Just wanted to give you some hope and let you know that things can still be okay even though you might think the worst....I found it so difficult to.stay positive. I was sooo scared, i am a bit of a glass half full person. It's awful having waited over Christmas, I can't tell you how stressed I've been. Good luck with your appointment and fingers crossed for you xx

Hi [@JenLam]‍ oh your posts make me smile - you've got a great attitude to it all and the best names for breasts :laugh:

A perkier uplift with lumpectomy sounds good to me and you seem happy with the approach which is great. I don't think any of us need to beat ourselves up about stuff like you smoking again when stressed. I need to step away from the biscuit barrel - comfort eating has been a thing for me over last few weeks which is annoying as I lost a stone two years ago and had been keeping it off. So right now I'm not running and eating more treats and my jeans are getting tighter but hey - big picture it doesn't really matter right now. Although gold star for looking at giving up smoking again. You go girl.

Well let's do a results swapsies on Friday when you get your HER2 result and I get my surgery pathology report. I have fingers crossed for you.

Keep your chin up and do what makes you feel good (apart from smoking haha). I'm swapping biscuits for fruit and getting outside for fresh air. I'm managing a walk each day and it is soooo good getting out for a bit even if I can't run for a while yet.

Take care xxx

Hiya! ️

Lovely to hear from you again! It sounds like your surgery went brilliantly Does the pathology report include details about exactly what type of cancer it is??? Or am I totally off track here?! It's possible! ‍♀️
Don't worry about a slight weight gain you can always walk it off as you start to recover. Then by the end of treatment/healing process you're fit, strong and can get into the jeans again! Result!

speaking of which...yes swappsies Friday sounds good  

lumpectomy may b off the cards depending on fri results. Heard lots of conflicting info so a bit confused now!! 
 

Not stopped the smoking yet. Getting my head around it and hope to stop Fri. Bit worried about the thought of chemo as I'm not one of those people who's gonna look good bald. Think Gollum meets an alien. Ok maybe it wouldn't be that bad!!!!! I can always throw on a headscarf....and some slap would probably help the face situation. Hmm still gotta b realistic you can't polish a turd. 
 

good luck for Friday and look after yourself x

Hi @JenLam yep tomorrow's pathology report to go through with the surgeon should tell me that. I'm a weird case as all along they have said it looks like cancer but two biopsies were inconclusive but indicating malignancy. Ultrasounds and mammograms were more certain it looked it. You never know it might end up being benign but I'm expecting it to be not good news. After two months of to-ing and fro-ing I just want some certainty which I should finally get tomorrow.

I know my MDT meets on Weds mornings so it's weird knowing my case has been discussed (for the third time!l) and my fate determined. Just one more sleep to go. 

What time is your meeting re your HER2 result? Mine is 1pm. I hope you too have a clearer path for the breastacles.

'Speak' tomorrow and good luck xxx

Hi again

The waiting is so hard. Once you have more info at least it's something to work with! They're being thorough I'll give them that!!! 
They haven't given me a time for results but I have work to keep me busy! Seems like this process is going to b a step at a time. Let's try not to get ahead of ourselves as it gets really overwhelming! 
Chat tomorrow. Thinking of you x

Hey Kiwirunner  

How did you get on with your results? 
Im HER2 Negative which means I won't need chemo. So brilliant news! Having to tell family members tomorrow and really not looking forward to it. 
 

I hope your results were good and your looking after self. Chat soon. Hugs xx

Hey [@JenLam]‍ oh wow that is great news to hear that you don't need chemo and you are HER2 negative. I bet that feels like good news!

I finally got to the bottom of my situation yesterday and it is such a relief to finally have a diagnosis after all the tests, and back and forth to the hospital.

Confirmed that I do in fact have breast cancer but the great news is that it was all removed during last week's operation so I don't need any further surgery. Yay!

I have a pretty rare type of breast cancer called Tubular Carcinoma (about 2% of cases). It was Grade 1 and tiny - only 3mm and had a Grade 2 DCIS growing next to it (5mm) so total tumour size only 8mm.

Apparently Tubular Carcinoma is a 'good one' to have as it is low growing, rarely spreads (so they don't even need to check my nodes) and has a really good prognosis.

Only got my results yesterday but already have an appt on Monday with the oncologist which is pretty amazing. They want to discuss radiotherapy which won't start until I am fully healed from the op last week - a few weeks time apparenlty. Location of my tumour is right over my heart so I have lots of questions for the oncologist about how that is managed safely. They would normally put me on Tamoxifen as my tumour was strongly ER positive but it raises the risk of DVTs and because I have had a DVT before it is probably too risky to be on that - something else to discuss on Monday. I had to do injections in my stomach for five days after my surgery last week and wear the sexy socks for a whole week due to my DVT risk (got it after a long haul flight from NZ a few years ago).

They also took some blood yesterday to see where I am on the menopause range. I have just turned 52 but no idea if I am through menopause or not as I had a hysterectomy when I was 39. Tamoxifen is for pre-menopause so there might a safer alternative to take if I am post-menopause.

Anyway - I feel oddly euphoric to finally have a diagnosis as I have had two months of expecting it to be a worse outcome.

Hope you are feeling reasonably positive and manage to tell family and friends OK today - it will be a weight off your mind when you do and you can draw on the support of those around you.

Hugs in return xx

Hi Kiwirunner!! 
There's a lot that has been going on! I hope you're well and recovering nicely! How r u feeling lately? There's so much to take in. You seem in good spirits and at least you have some answers now. :happy:
My surgery is booked for next Monday and I have an x ray this Thursday to check my lungs. Fingers crossed it hasn't spread. I've also got an isotope injection to the booblet on Thursday which I'm not looking forward to at all. With all these injections I'll be like a water sprinkler by the end of it!!! Still keeping positive and know they're doing everything they need to kick cancers butt. I'm just not very good with needles. 

what's your update and how have you been getting on? Hope you're safe and well. Xx

Hey [@JenLam]‍ good to hear from you! Booblet- the latest name. Love it! Are you still having a lumpectomy or is it now a mastectomy? How are you feeling about it? A couple of steps to get through before your surgery on Monday but just keep eating your elephant one bite at a time. That also means it is just one needle at a time and that makes it easier to deal with I think. 
Like you say you are in good hands and it's great to hear you are being chipper.

I've found the last few days harder to be honest. I think because I went back to work last week and everything is carrying on like normal around me even though treatment still yet to be completed. Felt pretty flat. 

Anyway, had my CT planning appointment today for the radiotherapy and that starts on 29 March so it does feel good to have some dates now. Got my tattoo dots and the one in my cleavage is quite big so just as well I don't flaunt the girls too much in low cut tops! I think I will take that week off and the one after. They said fit and active people get hit by fatigue more apparently so I should plan to be a bit wiped out. Hot date with Netflix and a pile of books on the cards then :laugh:

Good luck with the appointments on Thursday. Thinking of you xx

Hiya! 
Im having a lumpectomy with uplift!! Apparently I have enough boob to do this so am lucky! Tried to convince them to give me a tummy tuck while they're at it but they weren't up for it. So I'll have one pert boob and one droopy one for a while until they can do the reconstruction. Lovely! I've also asked them to remove my nipples as they're sensitive and not really needed any more. No more worrying about cold days with the nips out! Bonus!

Although people are supportive I think we need to remind ourselves that they haven't been through it so things 'go back to normal'. For us though it's different as it's a mental process too. 

How long is each radiotherapy session and how many days or weeks are you having it done for?  I was told after recovery it could be 1-3 weeks of radiotherapy, 10 minutes a time each day. Just have to wait for results from the op first. 
Hey when this is all over get flaunting I say!!! The girls deserve to be shown off!! 
 

Im thinking the same thing about Netflix and books to keep occupied!! Good luck but I'm sure we'll speak again before u have radiotherapy. 
Im shaving my head this Saturday and donating my hair to the Princess trust and am raising money for the Breast Cancer Care Clinic at my local hospital! We're up to £700 already so I'm chuffed! It's my daughters 9th birthday this Thursday and I have an x ray in the morning and injection in afternoon which sucks. Just hoping I'm ok after the isotope injection and we can have quality time together. Fingers crossed. 
Take care hun x

Hi [@JenLam]‍ that sounds brilliant to be getting an uplift out of it! You sound really positive which is brilliant and will really help with your recovery to be thinking like that.

So impressed with your fundraising commitment and shaving your head. Do you need chemo down the line or are you just embracing the hair loss concept in the spirit of the challenges faced by so many women?

The timing does suck doesn't it re your daugther's birthday and your appts that day. I had a birthday and my 20th wedding anniversary during all this. My wedding anniversary ended up as a 'dry' one for me as I was antibiotics for a raging toothache that couldn't be mixed with alcohol. Boo. I have a root canal next Monday as I thought I hadn't had enough fun so far in 2021 haha. NHS won't do it for me as they are under so much pressure and could only offer to extract the tooth, so I am having to shell out £700 privately for the pleasure and a further £350 to have it capped off. At least my NHS experience on the booblet front has been super positive.

My NHS trust does the 5 day treatment plan for radiotherapy for early stage breast cancer so each appt is 25 mins and they give a more intense treatment over a  shorter time frame. Not sure how long the actual radiotherapy itself is within that appt - quite a bit of time is getting you all in place to make sure it is identical each time you are there - hence the tattoo dots.

Hope your daughter's 9th birthday goes well even if Mum is having a weird day. Such a nice age - I always thing that is in the 'golden period' of parenting when they think you are still Christmas and do what you ask them to do haha.  I have a big hairy 19 year old son in his first year at uni and a 16 year old daughter in Year 12. They've popped out the other side of being a grunting/argumentative (select as appropriate) teenager and are now such good company.

Have a good day tomorrow on all fronts! xx

Hi [@JenLam]‍ that sounds brilliant to be getting an uplift out of it! You sound really positive which is brilliant and will really help with your recovery to be thinking like that.

So impressed with your fundraising commitment and shaving your head. Do you need chemo down the line or are you just embracing the hair loss concept in the spirit of the challenges faced by so many women?

The timing does suck doesn't it re your daugther's birthday and your appts that day. I had a birthday and my 20th wedding anniversary during all this. My wedding anniversary ended up as a 'dry' one for me as I was antibiotics for a raging toothache that couldn't be mixed with alcohol. Boo. I have a root canal next Monday as I thought I hadn't had enough fun so far in 2021 haha. NHS won't do it for me as they are under so much pressure and could only offer to extract the tooth, so I am having to shell out £700 privately for the pleasure and a further £350 to have it capped off. At least my NHS experience on the booblet front has been super positive.

My NHS trust does the 5 day treatment plan for radiotherapy for early stage breast cancer so each appt is 25 mins and they give a more intense treatment over a  shorter time frame. Not sure how long the actual radiotherapy itself is within that appt - quite a bit of time is getting you all in place to make sure it is identical each time you are there - hence the tattoo dots.

Hope your daughter's 9th birthday goes well even if Mum is having a weird day. Such a nice age - I always thing that is in the 'golden period' of parenting when they think you are still Christmas and do what you ask them to do haha.  I have a big hairy 19 year old son in his first year at uni and a 16 year old daughter in Year 12. They've popped out the other side of being a grunting/argumentative (select as appropriate) teenager and are now such good company.

Have a good day tomorrow on all fronts! xx

Hello again! 
perkier breasts sounds like a good deal to me! 
I decided to shave my hair as I was told I wouldn't need chemo and wanted to do something for those that have to have it. Feels like I'm giving a little something back. 
 

You'll have to make up for the drinking as soon as you're able!! A trip to the dentist is the last thing you need on top of all this but you're taking it well. Especially when you have to pay for it too. 
 

Ah yes, the nurse told me I may need a 5 day radiotherapy sesh after surgery too. 
so glad to hear the grunting has transitioned into something meaningful and that's all extra support which you need right now. 
Sit tight and keep looking after yourself x

Hey [@JenLam]‍ i just wanted to wish you all the best for your surgery tomorrow. 
How did Thursday go with your daughter's birthday, your chest x-ray and the dye injection? What a full on day for you!
Thinking of you and here's hoping it all goes well xx

Hi really sorry i have not been on for some time. As you know i had really good news with my breast lump. Didnt feel i should therefore keep commenting when you are all going through so much. I often think about you all and i do appreciate that i was lucky on this occasion. I am wishing you all well and keeping everything crossed for you all . Sending you all so much love and good luck xxx

Hiya! :laugh:
Thursday went really well all things considered! No where near painful just a little uncomfortable and only for a minute. My daughter Farrah really enjoyed. R u on Facebook or Instagram? Chest x ray all done too was in and out in a jiff. 
 

Little nervous about tomorrow but was more worried about the isotope injection?? Weird?! 
The old noggin has had a shave and looks better than what I thought so I'm happy Id recommend having the chop to any woman. It's liberating and I feel like a new woman! 
 

Thank u for ur message. Means so much. I have loads of support and love around me am appreciating every minute. My husband has been brilliant but I can see it's taking its toll on him which is hard. 
How r u doing? What's next on the agenda for u now? I hope ur keeping ur self care in check and u know where I am if u need a chat. 
jen xx

Hi [@JenLam]‍ sorry not been on here for a bit. Glad last week went well. How was surgery on Monday and how are you feeling now? Hope you are taking it easy!

I know what you mean - my husband has been brilliant but I worried about the emotional load on him. Hardest thing post-op is remembering not to lift heavy things or reach over your head. I kept forgetting and then my body would remind me! I used it as a good excuse to have him and my daughter look after stuff for the first few days and then I realised I was a useless patient and just wanted to do stuff :laugh:

I am fine. Enjoying having a bit of a mental break from it all while I wait to start radiotherapy on 29 March. I jazzed things up with a root canal on Monday. Gawd that was horrendous. 90 minutes of lying rigid with my hands clasped in terror. Found all the breast cancer stuff easier to cope with!
 

 I've decided I will take a bit of time off work for the radiotherapy. Just means it is so busy at work now trying to get projects sorted and making sure my team will be ok when I am off. I'm too conscientious for my own good and just need to put my health first for a change. 

Well I hope you are doing well. Will you get full pathology report at a post op follow up next week do you know?

Keep me posted and thinking of you xx

Hi Kiwirunner!

Long time no speak.  The surgery went well but I had a bit of a reaction to anaesthetic so they kept me in overnight.  I then had an infection and was feeling rough but Dr came to the house to check me over and give antibiotics so I;m back on the mend now! Constipation has become real! All the drugs have taken their toll but I'm feeling so much better today thankfully!

I know what you mean about trying to be a good patient!! I'm trying to take control of the little things whcih in turn make things easier for those around me which I find a big help mentally too.  I think we both need to learn to let go of some of these things, just for now while we recover.

The root canal sounds so harsh and that will take a toll on yur body too so you have to remember to give yourself a break.  It's not forever! Same goes for work as well, I'm sure your team can cope and by trusting them to get things done you're giving them the opportunity to feel like they're helping. :) 

I should get my results either 26 March or 29 I think it would be good to have more information on how to move forward with things! Been thinking of you too, stay strong and take care of yourself hun. xx

Hi [@JenLam]‍ gosh you opted for a bit of a dramatic experience with our anaesthetic reaction and then an infection! You sound like your usual perky self though and seem to be dealing with it well (although we can give ourselves permission to not feel great on days too...). That will be another good step forward to get your full results from the surgery. I hope they got clear margins and things are looking good on that front - do keep me posted won't you.

You have been in my thoughts even if I have not been on here as much lately. Trying to get things tied off at work this week, and even more so as discoverd today that I am due to start radiotherapy on Friday 26th rather than Monday 29th!  I thought it was odd when I got home from my planning appt to see there were only four days of treatment scheduled on the form they gave me, when I was meant to be having five days. On Sunday, I was registering my Covid home testing kit that the hospital sent and that flagged up I was in the system to do a test on Tuesday, implying I was starting radiotherapy on Friday instead.

I emailed the person in charge of the radiotherapy appointments on Sunday afternoon so it was there this morning and by 8.15am she had already replied today (Monday) to say yes it is meant to start on Friday! My NHS trust continues to impress at how responsive they are.

I am going to take the treatment week off and the week after, so now trying to wedge five days of work into four days! I'm starting to tell more people at work as with a second bit of time off it is looking odd why I am not available for things. I'm a completely open book with friends and family but for some reason I haven't been quite my usual 'over sharing' self at work :laugh:. I work for a big organisation with 2000 staff so just cherry picking who needs to know. My manager and my team are amazing and that makes such a difference. To be honest I am rather looking forward to taking a bit of time out as it has been a mad few months with so much going on with the cancer stuff drawn out over such a period of time.

Anyway - enough of me banging on - would love to hear how you are doing and how you get on with results.

You take care too xxxx

Hi Kiwirunner!

I just wanted to let you know you're in my thoughts! I just had a good think about how well I want things to go for you and how everyone around you is doing all they can to help you through this. Don't stress about work. You need all your energy to heal and recover. You've got this in the bag, lady!! (Had to add a comma - I'm not calling u a baglady!:wink:)
Jen x

Hey [@JenLam]‍ always nice to hear from you and you make me laugh every time. Punctuation makes the world of difference and nice to think I am not a bag lady :laugh:

Had my first radiotherapy session this morning. All went fine - felt like I was in a Mission Impossible film with the green beams all over my body and on the ceiling. Love the chat between the radiographers as they throw numbers and and measurements at each other while prodding you into the exact right position. You just lie there pretending it is all totally normal with your boobs in their full glory with two people have a perfectly nice little natter and also including you in a bit of banter.The actual treatment time is only about a minute out of the whole 25 min appt.

They asked me at the end if I was in a brass band (?!) as my lung capacity/ability to hold my breath was rather impressive. Who knew? I was crap at the recorder and the piano but never picked up a trumpet or a tuba. Haha.

Anyway - how about you? How are you doing post surgery?  You are due to get your results today or on Monday aren't you? Have been thinking of you too and have hoping you are doing OK. Do let me know how you get on with the results and next steps. Take care xx

Hi ‍♀️ 

Long time no speak! It's been a bit hectic in the last two weeks! I got brilliant results on the 29th - they got out all the cancer and the lymph nodes were clear!!!! So chuffed! However, when I got home we had a visit from the police. My ex husband decided to ask for a welfare check as he thought my daughter had no bed and wasn't eating!!! Since he found out I have cancer the harassment has got worse so I'm doing what I can at court and Womens Aid have been a massive help! Just need to get things in place so I can recover in peace! Anyway that's a whole other forum!!! 
 

How are feeling after radiotherapy now? I heard that sometimes a couple weeks after is when it can make you a bit squeasy? Glad your first experience was a good one and you make it sound a breeze!!! When they asked if you'd been in a brass band??!!!! Nice set of lungs on you!  Add it to your CV I say!
I hope you're not working too much and are giving yourself proper time to recover. Xx I've just realised that I'm probably going to be off work for 6 months at least and then when I need the other bap done it may be another 6 months. Eek! It's made a realise that I need some sort of routine going on cos I've been so tired lately my sleeping pattern is all over the place. I'm exhausted but can't sleep?!! What's that about init!! I've looked up lumpectomy recovery times and they range from weeks to 6-12 months (until everything's functioning to peak performance. Like doing full on cartwheels without the risk of your *** feeling like they'll explode). I've also looked up recovery for an uplift/mammoplasty which is pretty much 3 months tops (we're talking starjumps with minimum security of (bra)ge and no pain. Feels like a million miles away at the moment but I'm doing my exercises and trying to make friends with my new boobie. There was what can only be described as a 'nub' sitting just under where you'd expect a nipple to be on a ***. I freaked a bit! I thought 'I've just asked the surgeon to take off my nipple and she's tried to fashion some sort of grim (slightly smaller than a man's sized nipple) nub!' Luckily my hubby said it was just where the skin folds back together and it'll heal into the scar. He was right it's smooth now! Phew!

Im hoping to find out if I need chemo next week. What with the Easter bank hols it's delayed the result coming back for the Oncotype test. 
 

How have you been the past couple of weeks? Be good to hear back soon. Xx