Hi Hayley,

We are all a little reluctant to look for the first time, but it's really fantastic to hear that you've had such a good result.

You are fully justified in feeling super proud of what you've achieved. People talk about being disappointed about appearance after surgery. Like you, I feel that these are amongst my battle scars. They identify me and what I have gone through along life's path. They are not there for self-pity, but to show how much stronger I've become with each new operation (and there have been plenty). I think that I have also become a more compassionate person, as I have seen so many people who are a lot worse off than me and, that makes me feel so humble that I am still here. This has not changed the person that I am. I am still the same person on the inside and, nothing can rob me of this identity, unless I allow this to happen.

I am so happy to hear that our input has been a help to you throughout all this.

I hope that your pathology results are good too.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi izzy, 

Just wanted to check in and see how your doing? 

Hayley x

Hi Hayley

Thanks for checking on me! I'm waiting for a last minute miracle, if I'm honest.

I spoke to my surgeon yesterday and he'll get back to me with a surgery date for the therapeutic mammoplasty w/c 15/05 or 22/06. I so don't want this.

in the meantime he referred me to the DIEP plastic surgeon for a video consultation Friday morning (hence waiting for a miracle where he will say tomorrow, "sure you can have an immediate DIEP in two weeks".

Not going to happen, is it.

how are you doing? Healing ok? And how's the mood?

Hi Izzy, 

You never know..miracles do happen,

Why is he sending you for a consultation with a DIEP plastic surgeon if this is not available? I have my everything crossed for you tomorrow x 

I'm ok...the wound has healed well and took the dressings off myself, although because the expander is only partly filled you can touch it and there is nothing there and can swish when I walk..very weird.

I've been back up on my feet for the past week and trying to get on with things although sleeping is a nightmare..on my back with a surgical bra! (Can take this off now though) got my date for results and see my consultant on the 15th x

The kids are coming home today and staying at home...I've seen them the past 2 weeks for bits and Bob's but not been able to lift the 2 year old felt it better if they stayed with their dad x cant wait

Sons 9th birthday on saturday and my big 40th on monday....although feeling more depressed about that than anything else lol xx

Let me know how you get on and I'm thinking of you tomorrow 

Hayley xx

Hi Izzy,

I have just been listening to the lunchtime news and, they were talking about getting cancer diagnostics, surgery and treatments back on track. You never know, that miracle could happen on Friday yet!

Keeping my fingers crossed that it does.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Hayley,

It sounds as if you are doing really well apart from the sleeping. I managed to sleep on my side immediately after my double mastectomy with the help of a small heart shaped cushion, which I placed under my arm.

I hope that you don't find having the kids back too taxing, although I'm sure that you'll be glad to see them.

Wow, both birthdays are so close together. Don't fret about your fortieth, this is when life begins!

I hope that your consultant has good news for you on 15th.

Have my fingers crossed.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Izzy, 

How did the consultation with the diep plastic surgeon go? 

Been busy with birthdays, but have been thinking about how you was getting on x

Hayley x

Hi Hayley. Did you have a good birthday?

its my youngest's 12th birthday Wednesday next week and two days later is my lumpectomy with therapeutic mammoplasty.

I spoke to the PS and his advice is to delay DIEP anyway as I may need radiotherapy even with a mastectomy. Plus he can't see DIEPs resuming until at least September/ October time.

I suppose, if it turns out I don't need radio after all I could request a mastectomy but they won't know until my pathology comes back. It's all so hard.

how are you recovering?

Hi Izzy, 

Had a lovely birthday, my 2 eldest 16 and 9 decorated the full house...I have a ceiling full of balloons!! We had cake and we ordered in food, not a lot else to do and it was raining here.

Happy birthday to your youngest..I have lots of birthdays in june.

You seem to be a bit more upbeat about it all...which is good and at least you have had another opinion on it as well. Fingers crossed you wont need the radio x

I'm recovering well..scar has healed well,  still restricted in some things cause this bloody expander hurts, its sticks out at the side. Feeling ok just waiting for results on monday so the sleepless nights are kicking in again.

Hope you have lots of fun for your daughters birthday and please let is know how you get on...or if you just need a chat 

Hayley xx