Hi everyone. I've just found this forum after frantically googling about a "posotive HPV + borderline" letter after my smear. I'm now extra worried as everyone seems to have to wait weeks for an appointement after a letter like this. My letter says I will get a phonecall within 10days. Especially with it being a pandemic, it feels very rushed to me. I've known from the age of 18 that I have HPV (I am now 30), I've smoked since I was a teenager (obviously this just adds to the chances of having cervical cancer) and I sometimes bleed after sex but not everytime and it's just a smudge of blood (I've only started dating my on/off boyfriend for the past few months and was single for 2 years before then, so I assumed the bleeding after sex was normal as it had been a while since I'd had sex and my current partner is bigger, if you know what I mean, so never thought anything of it). Now I've convinced myself I have cervical cancer and I'm dying. I've had one smear in the past, years ago. I never received a letter after that one so rung my sexual health clinic who said its nothing to worry about as I would have had a letter if anything had been found but ahe didn't sound too sure and I never followed it up. So now I'm wondering did they even send the sample of that one to a lab or maybe loose my results. So I'm 30, had HPV for at least 12years, no guarantee that I've had an actual smear test result before, showing symptoms and now have a letter in front of me saying they have found borderline changes with posotive HPV and to expect a call within days. It's only been a few hours since I read my letter and I'm already thinking how am I going to tell my 10yeard old little girl that her Mum is going to die. I sound pathetic, dramatic and silly but I need to write my worries out and tell someone to make myself feel less anxious. I just messaged one of my closest friends who replied saying it will just be a precaution then went on to say how great it was that she just had a good grade for her unni assignment. I was hoping for a little more assurance, haha. I feel better already after reading some of the posts here but slightly alarmed my letter mentions 10 days. Possibly diferent arreas have diferent waiting lists. I would call my local surgery tomorrow for some reassurance and more clarity but trying to get an appointement there is harder than getting to the moon. Especially now with covid. It took me 8 months just to get the smear test as they were constantly fully booked. I even called a private health centre to get one there but was quoted £430 which I couldn't aford. Sorry for rambling, I just needed to let it out somewhere. X

Hi everyone. I've just found this forum after frantically googling about a "posotive HPV + borderline" letter after my smear. I'm now extra worried as everyone seems to have to wait weeks for an appointement after a letter like this. My letter says I will get a phonecall within 10days. Especially with it being a pandemic, it feels very rushed to me. I've known from the age of 18 that I have HPV (I am now 30), I've smoked since I was a teenager (obviously this just adds to the chances of having cervical cancer) and I sometimes bleed after sex but not everytime and it's just a smudge of blood (I've only started dating my on/off boyfriend for the past few months and was single for 2 years before then, so I assumed the bleeding after sex was normal as it had been a while since I'd had sex and my current partner is bigger, if you know what I mean, so never thought anything of it). Now I've convinced myself I have cervical cancer and I'm dying. I've had one smear in the past, years ago. I never received a letter after that one so rung my sexual health clinic who said its nothing to worry about as I would have had a letter if anything had been found but ahe didn't sound too sure and I never followed it up. So now I'm wondering did they even send the sample of that one to a lab or maybe loose my results. So I'm 30, had HPV for at least 12years, no guarantee that I've had an actual smear test result before, showing symptoms and now have a letter in front of me saying they have found borderline changes with posotive HPV and to expect a call within days. It's only been a few hours since I read my letter and I'm already thinking how am I going to tell my 10yeard old little girl that her Mum is going to die. I sound pathetic, dramatic and silly but I need to write my worries out and tell someone to make myself feel less anxious. I just messaged one of my closest friends who replied saying it will just be a precaution then went on to say how great it was that she just had a good grade for her unni assignment. I was hoping for a little more assurance, haha. I feel better already after reading some of the posts here but slightly alarmed my letter mentions 10 days. Possibly diferent arreas have diferent waiting lists. I would call my local surgery tomorrow for some reassurance and more clarity but trying to get an appointement there is harder than getting to the moon. Especially now with covid. It took me 8 months just to get the smear test as they were constantly fully booked. I even called a private health centre to get one there but was quoted £430 which I couldn't aford. Sorry for rambling, I just needed to let it out somewhere. X

You sound like me.

all sorts of things going through my head.

ive been a mess all day, just bursting into tears thinking the worst. 

i just want my colposcopy now so i know whats what, i already feel so ill with worry x

It's a relief and calming to know it's not just me. I woke up this morning feeling really silly and embarassed of myself for getting so worked up, but I guess it's normal and I'm not the only one that would be upset over it. I went to call the helpline number they put on my letter for "Jo's Cervical Cancer Trust Helpline" (0800 802 8000) just to ask if they think my appointement will come by letter or if they will call me by phone, but the number doesn't even exist. When I call it, it doesn't ring, it just beeps once and goes off. Thats annoyed me. Why put a helpline number on my letter that doesn't even work. I'll just keep an eye out for a letter or phonecall. They said it would be within 10 days but thats just to let me know when the colposcopy date is. If the colposcopy is in a few weeks time I'm just going to be so anxious for weeks. I'm hoping everyone else has a short wait too. It doesn't help we're in a pandemic does it with appointements taking longer than usual times. I will come here to give updates when I hear more from them.
*Sending air hugs to anyone who needs one.* 

Ive booked to go privately and have an appointment next wed 10th. Cant afford it but ill find it.

all ive done today is cry. i feel so poorly just from worry. 

not only about what they are going to find on wed but also the prospect of a lifetime watching, waiting, constantly waiting for what seems like the inevitable. 

i really am so low. being anxious over health, esp the C word, is not helping me cope x

Hey,

How much are you paying for private? I need a colposcopy too as I found out last week I have HPV and borderline changes to cells :( I'm so worried too so I know how you feel :( I'm tempted to go private just because I don't want to wait months for an appointment because of my anxiety.

K xx

have sent you a add friend request on here x

Thank you! I think I've accepted! Sorry am new to this x

if you go to the top of this page, on the purple bat you will see your name. click on that and you can see the message i sent you x

bar even