Hello, I just wanted to emotionally explode by posting on this forum to see if anyone relates to me :(

I am a 24 year old female going through what feels like hell. For the past 3-4 years i’ve had a chronic cough, nothing major and would get worse at night - allergies I thought.

5 Weeks ago, the cough worsened and had a painful chest to touch (felt bruised). Had a clear chest x ray. Now my symptoms have spiralled out of control and googling has caused me to be on a brink of a mental breakdown.

I have had clear blood tests except signs of my thyroid being slightly out of whack, a tiny bit over active, one dr thinks this is due to my illness. He assumed this was glandular fever, that blood test came back negative.

I have logged my symptoms for weeks and have over 20 which sounds crazy. It started feeling serious when I couldn’t swallow food properly and had very swollen lymph nodes in my neck, I felt food get stuck and this followed with severe chest pain that lasted 9 days (I have never suffered with acid reflux symptoms before). I stopped eating and managed liquids.

I can now eat solids but still feel it get kind of stuck and slowly manage to make its way down and will only eat if I have water. My lymph nodes have been up for over 5 weeks now and i have felt exhausted through all of this - I spend most of the day in bed or having an emotional freak out! My tonsils have also changed shape this year (huge and pitted) and the sides of my tongue have bumps on - apparently swollen pappilae or something? It looks horrifying to me.

I also have had problems with my left eye, it does not focus properly and often excessively waters and this started around the time of my original chest pain.

I have experienced dull headaches, an icey cold feeling in my head, throat and chest, mouth ulcers, gum inflammation and a slightly green looking tongue. Of course google has me so far convinced that it is some oral type of cancer or oesophageal cancer, completely petrifying and with all my body aches my brain is thinking ‘it is spreading!’. I have also had a sore throat on and off.

Fast forward til now (roughly 6 weeks in) and I feel a shadow of my former self. I struggle to move, my body aches, especially my joints and pelvic area - something in my pelvic area feels so heavy. I also get pain in my left rib cage area and my right! I feel like I sound completely bonkers will all of this. I have often woken up at night with a rapid heartbeat and sweating like mad - I am honestly breaking down and losing hope. Lymphoma is also a worry but the doctor reassured me that that would show in bloods... I have read countless times that people have had normal blood tests with morbid diagnosis’!

I am having an ultrasound on the 31st and will see a gastrologist on the 4th. I am honestly convinced I have cancer and my mental health has hit an all time low, I am completely miserable and an emotional mess and just wish I could numb all of this worry. I feel I am going to recieve a morbid diagnosis that will take a long time to get and then eventually die. Sounds dramatic I know but my mind truly believes this. I am so desperate for help.

Sorry for the long first post and thank you to anyone who read it. I feel a mix of mentally insane and on the brink of a huge sinister health decline :(