Hello love, 

I can 100% relate to this.  I'm constantly coughing and I've got really bad back pain and pain around my eyes and cheeks. On top of that I've got black mucus which I've read to be a sign of lung cancer. I've also got really bad health anxiety. Everyday is honestly a battle to get through and it's so hard to stay part of reality. Health anxiety sucks honestly. 

I'm exactly the same - 24 and absolutely terrified. I've had some persisting changes in my nipple and areola that I've said I want to get checked out but now I'm also getting leg pain and I'm terrified that the cancer in my breast (I'm 99% sure it's cancer) has metastasised and that I've got lymphoma.

I've been totally freaking out too, I've got an appointment with my GP on Wednesday but I can't stop googling symptoms. I haven't had a full night's sleep in weeks and I wake up at least once a night with sweats. My appetite is all over the place.

I'm so scared and I feel so alone - I haven't told anyone yet because I don't want to worry them. Reading your post made me see that there's someone out there that's my age and is as worried as I am, so thank you for sharing. I totally relate. Whatever happens, we'll be okay

Hi :) I'm sorry to hear you are both suffering I could have also written your posts! 
I know 95% of my illnesses are my health anxiety but they feel so real! N that's the illness talking like for tonight for example I was checking my breasts in the bath as you do and I came across a tiny lump in the side of my right breast. I'm straight to the GP tomorrow and even though you can hardly feel anything n I haven't a lot of other typical symptoms I'm convinced it's cancer  a book was given to me recently on nervous illness and anxiety etc and it's called Dr Claire Weeks how to overcome nervous illness and it's just so fitting and understanding I am over half way through n my god it's worth the read !! It's amazing ! How are u doin now x 

It is nice to hear from someone around my age also, I feel that sometimes I get written off as having something minor due to my age and statistics and have only got taken seriously when I couldn’t eat :( Now in my head it is too late and it has spread and now I don’t even want to function right now, I am a mental state and petrified for the tests to come as I feel they will be my worst nightmare and I will have to cope with that and the concept of dying!! Sorry for the dramatic rant :( 

Let me know how your GP app goes Wednesday, did you read any other causes for what you have except cancer? Lymphoma is a fear of mine too but it is being outpowered by my fear of oral cancers/oesaphageal cancer at the moment :( I also wake up sweaty and I actually hate waking up - I immediately lay there and acknowledge what feels abnormal and how hot I feel and straight away my day is just ruined. Feel free to message me if you need someone to rant to because I feel scared sick so completely relate. I hope wednesday brings you some reassurance x

Thank you for replying! I think it’s amazing that you can acknowledge that 95% of your illness is driven by health anxiety, that must be reassuring! I really want to get to that stage where I can reassure myself it is just anxiety but I am so convinced it is cancer that I can’t think any other way right now. Every symptom I have fits the profile of oesaphageal cancer, oral cancer and lymphoma with the exception of vomitting. I have every other symptom and I am so frightened I just want this to all be over. If I do get through this (and god I am praying I do) and find out it is not cancer, I will definitely look into that book. I have a feeling this whole process has left a mental scar and it would definitely take me a long time to recover from this mentally.

Let me know how your GP appointment goes, any lump is scary and a trigger. My swollen lymph nodes are one of my scariest as seeing things bulging out of my neck isn’t exactly comforting!! So scary xx

Yeah, it's so good to hear from someone young - I've been reading a lot on the Teenage Cancer Trust website and that's been handy but I wish they had some kind of helpline you could call.

I'm the same, especially as a guy with nipple changes - I've had health anxiety since I was young so I've almost conditioned myself to think that everything is going to be fine. I don't think it is this time though and that's the scary bit. I'm exactly the same as you re feeling like it's too late and it's been so hard to think about - in some ways though that's been the easy bit. I know I can do that work and get myself to that place if needs be, I'm more worried about my family and friends.

Also I'm not sure if it's just me subconsciously looking, but there seems to be loads of cancer stuff in the news/on telly at the moment and that's been tough, I feel like I'm surrounded by reminders. Night time is defo the worst, I feel so so lonely.

I might need to message you at some point, I can't concentrate on anything else at the moment. Good to chat though, like I say it's been so good to speak to someone in a similar place x

A helpline would be amazing, maybe a reassurance line that could list me 10 other conditions that counter my cancer diagnosis.. that would be amazing haha. 

Perhaps being a guy is something to clutch onto here, since breast cancer is so much less likely but I understand your worries re lymphoma, do you feel tired at all? I have had anxiety issues my whole life also but not health related, I just have a really bad feeling this time so understand where you are coming from.

Nights are terrible, as are mornings for me. I wake up and have to realise I don’t feel normal, and then at night the scariest thoughts pop into my head. Honestly just miserable. 

I can’t concentrate on anything else either, people say watch a film or find distraction but I can’t, all I think about is what could potentially be wrong with my body. Sigh, I so hope we come out ok. xx

Hahah 100%! That would be the absolute best.

Being a guy is something, as is knowing that the type of breast cancer I think I have is quite rare in women, so I'm feeling particularly special hahah. Having said that, I do think I've got an underlying health issue that increases my chance of having breast cancer and one of my grandparents had breast cancer - but again the underlying condition hasn't been formally diagnosed, so I guess that's another story I'm making in my head. If both of those are the case, then all I can say is it's genetic, totally random and out of my control and in a way that's giving me a bit of comfort. 

I've been feeling tired but I wouldn't say any moreso than usual - life's been really full on at the moment so it's not especially unexplained. The one thing that's really getting to me is that my leg has started to feel a bit uncomfortable - mainly in one leg. That's been really scary. 

Mornings have been scary for me too, mainly because I have to shower, which means looking at my nipple, but night is the worst for me, just because I don't feel like there's anyone I can speak to. 100% get you on distractions too - like what can I do?

I watched the Bill Turnbull documentary the other day and he ends on a nice note - he basically says that as long as you have love, whatever happens you'll be okay. So here's sending you lots of love and warmth in the hope it'll comfort you xx

Hey guys 

i always feel like I am the only one in the world with health anxiety it’s awfyl iv had it maybe 5 years now terrified of cancer. Your not alone x