Hi Gillian,

I have wondered how you were getting on, so it's good to hear from you, although I'd rather hear better news.

How are you coping with chemo? I'm sorry that your daughter had to stay with her dad due to her cold - I can imagine the ructions when you told her. Still, at 15, she's old enough to appreciate the risks.

I have had a lumpectomy and a double mastectomy. Both were 'doable', but I just wanted to let you know that my mastectomies were easier than my lumpectomy. Are you planning on having reconstruction?

Do please keep us updated and let us know how you get on. We are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Yes the waiting is very hard! The “what ifs” are driving me crazy at the moment. Yesterday wasn’t a good day at all. I woke up fine and managed to get a few things done then took a massive nose dive and spent the remainder of the day in on and off floods of tears. I spoke to the breast clinic over the phone who ran through everything with me and whereas I thought I was having a mammogram, I’m having everything done in one appointment and I think that shook me up a little.

used the gym as a distraction and it did life my mood until my daughter came home from school and I felt fine again when she came home.

I’m determined to have a better day today.

this group is amazing and is keeping me sane right now! I’ll certainly keep everyone updated xxxx

Hi Marie,

Most of us would agree that this is one of the worst stages in our cancer journeys. Don't expect to get a diagnosis at your first apointment. Some people do, but these are few and far between. 1-2 weeks after your first visit you will be recalled for the results. It is much easier to get this all carried out in the one visit and, it means that you will get the results of all three tests back together. This reduces the waiting time for you and that has to be good news.

I am sorry to hear that yesterday wasn't a good day for you and hope that today was better. Again, it is not at all unusual to cry at the least thing and to find that our emotions are all over the place. Don't worry about the tears, crying reduces some of the tension, so just let them flow. Your emotions will improve once you know what you are dealing with, but there are just too many 'unknowns' for you to cope with at present.

Try to deal with things from day to day at the moment and don't look at the bigger picture, until you know what you are dealing with. Keep yourself as busy as you can to distract yourself from the wait.

Out of every 10 women referred to the breast clinic, only 1 person has breast cancer. Even those of us who do have cancer, have a good chance of living with cancer rather than dying with it.

Have you had any word of when your clinic appointment is yet?

Kind regards,
Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine

thank you for your reply! 

Today was a better day. I’ve kept myself busy until my daughter came home from school and I’m fine when she’s about. The worries are still there but I’m calmer today. Being a part of this community has definatelty helped me and I’m ever so grateful for that and as you said I’m taking it one day at a time. 

I did ring the clinic in the end yesterday and spoke to one of the nurses. They’ve had my referral but have yet to book me in she said. She said it will be within two weeks of the referral date. At my appointment I will have a mammogram,ultrasound,biopsy and aspiration of my lump. I think hearing this made my anxiety rocket but I’ve since been told it’s routine. I get the consultants opinion on the same day too she told me so I’m lucky there xxx

Hi I'm terrified, I discovered a large, hard lump on Friday, went to the doctor's Monday, she confirmed a 3cm lump and a few smaller ones. I've slight dimpling and enlarged vein above . My mum just finished her treatment and my best friend just had her 4th op . I am 47 and actually had a mammogram back in October. I'm not sure whether to be reassured by that or not. The lump is really hard  and uneven. I have to wait until 23rd April for my appointment.  I"m trying to keep busy but this is my 2 weeks Easter holiday. 

Mel

Hi Jolamine

Thank you for replying. Yes my mammogram was clear, my husband keeps reassuring me that that is a good sign. But I've heard if people, like yourself, that have still being diagnosed after one. 

I went into school yesterday to do some e revision with pupils, it was certainly better being busy. I'll take your advice anf stop googling, each click swings from reassurance to a scare story. Just desperately searching for some reassurance I guess. 

I've looked at going private but think I'd only be in a few days earlier and we can't really afford it. 

Thank you ahaag for replying and I hope you are well now.

Mel xx

Hi Mel,

I had been recalled after a mammogram about 5 years before diagnosis, but on the repeat mammogram, I was told that all was clear. The year that I was diagnosed, I had my mammogram about 4 months before my diagnosis and was told that all was clear. I then found the lump in my breast during one of my routine examinations. The same happened a year later with the same breast.

To be fair, my type of cancer (Mucinous) is a rare one and doesn't always show up on mammogram or ultrasound, so this may be why it was missed. At this stage we always tendto think the worst. Try to hold on to the fact that your last mammogram was clear and, here's hoping that this is still the case. Some people just have lumpy breasts.

I agree that there's not much to gain by going private. It may bring your results forward a few days, but most people return to the NHS for any surgery or treatment needed. Your bill would mount up quickly if you had to pay for everything. Although I had a few issues to start with, I have found the NHS to be truly marvellous in the past nine years.

I am glad to hear that you felt better going into school yesterday and being busy. Any distraction is a help at this stage. Dr Google will only scare you further. A lot of this information is out of date, poorly researched and aimed at the spectacular. You don't need that. Fortunately, most cases are not as black as they are painted here.

I shall be thinking of you on 23rd April.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi jolamine,

I had a mammogram a year before I found my lump, mammogram was all clear.....mine was mucinous too.....I hadn't realised they don't always show up on tests? Must admit...I'm super paranoid about checking now, every day in fact! A bit ott I know....hope all good with you xxxxx

HI Marlyn,

This is interesting. No, mucinous cancers don't always show up. Try to be gentle with yourself if you are checking yourself every day. Otherwise, you'll be constantly sore.

Hope that you're ok at the momet. I'm still doing well, despite all the aches and pains.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx