Hello,

I am going through this right now. I went for a mammogram on May 2 and they saw something and did the biopsies in my breast and armpit. During the ultrasound the doctor told me to bring someone with me when I come in for results. I explained I don't have anyone to support me right now, my family live abroad. She sent me into see the doctor after 2 rounds of biopsies (5 punches in total) and 3 mammograms. They gave me a card for breast care nurses for extra support. Even though they don't have the results of the biopsies they told me it was cancer and they would most likely have to operate later this month. I know how worrying this is for you but the equipment they use is so advanced now and the doctors can usually tell with about 90% accuracy if it is cancer. If they didn't tell you it is cancer it could be you are clear or there is something you caught very early. My breasts were very sore the next day after the mammograms and needles, so dont worry that is normal. I had itching for 2 months before the appointment and they said that is just a skin condition and nothing related to the cancer. If there is one piece of advice I can give you it is this. You are where you are. There is only moving forward from this point. It's really important if you are prone to anxiety to take time for yourself to really support and take care of yourself physically and mentally during this process. Remember we are all in this together. What you have gotten through so far was gruelling, i know because I've just done it myself. But you got yourself there and you faced it head on and did it. The rest, whatever that happens to be, you can deal with too. Trust yourself that you are going to see yourself through this the same way you have overcome every hurdle life has thrown at you so far. You are stronger than you think. Sending loving healing energy your way, friend. xxx

Thank you so much for your kind and honest words. I keep telling myself to wait for the appointment, to be honest a close relative was with me, she has been through this and got the all clear. I said I was worried and she told me you have got this, if I can do it you can. She also thinks it’s is a high chance it is because of our Family history and I felt the way they spoke by saying have you got someone with you that they felt I needed someone there, After my triple assessment we saw the doctors together and by the questions and how they spoke  we both felt that they think it is possibly cancer but they need the results before they will say so. On my referral note to fast track, they wrote length of lump is 8cm long by 1cm width. She also told me it feels deep and bit lumpy, which I said it was lumpy. They have not confirmed to me the size at the triple assessment. I asked the ultrasound radiographer what size it was and she showed me the wand they use and said it’s within this parimeter, she didn’t really clarify, but the base of this is around 8cm so she could see but wouldn’t confirm it. I will be back a week tomorrow for a meeting and they are going to discuss a treatment plan going forward either way. I think irregardless of cancer cells they are thinking it needs removing due to my family history and they think there might be sinister cells there due to a shadow on the mammogram and the ultrasound confirmed to them the lump is probably not a cyst.so far I am telling myself to take each day as it is. I am telling myself to listen and take it in and to fight this for myself, my husband and my kids. I am worried about all sorts but now I have to prioritise me to put myself in the best position to fight this and move forward. Your advice makes sense and thank you for reaching out to me. It must be hard not being near family, I wish you well and stay strong too my friend x

Hi boxstar, I have a very strong family history too. My mom died of breast cancer at 42 and her sisters and mothers died from breast cancer also. The youngest was my aunt, she died at 38. But the treatments since the 70s and 80s have come so far. The technology they are using is really superior than anything we have ever seen before. I have been very calm through the entire process because I suffered from severe anxiety for my entire life and this just put everything into perspective for me. Worrying for the last 10 years that i was having a heart attack (because that is exactly what a panic attack feels like) and for what? My advice to you is take control of the situation. Use your time to educate yourself (not cancer doom scrolling lol) take care of your diet, get some exercise, do some form of prayer, meditation or relaxation techniques and just be in this moment, because the future is not real. By the time the "future" happens it will be in the now moment. Everything is now.  This moment is your life :) xx

Thank you for your lovely words. Cancer is an awful disease but it sure brings out the best in us. It reminds us of what is important and what really isn't. Sorting out the house and garden can be a very relaxing and rewarding activity too. I think I will join you and do a big spring clean over the next week or 2! I don't have pets but there are 9 stray cats that come into my garden every day and I have been feeding them for 8 years. They give me little moments of pure joy! Also, there are some wonderful doctors on youtube that give nutritional advice. They can tell you what supplements will help strengthen your immune system, I believe Vit D3 is important so I have stocked up on that, I decided to look at all of life as an adventure and this is just a part of the ride. I have learned that anxiety and excitement are only different in our minds, but your body is doing exactly the same thing when you are anxious or excited. My favourite mentor once said When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change. And that is not a clever play on words. It is actually true! I hope you have a beautiful rest of the day and please feel free to add me if you would like to chat privately xx Jill 

Thank I will, take care x