Eastendgirl thank you  xxx

You're welcome xx

Thank you Eastendgirl 

I appreciate this so much.

Mentally I'm not ready to consider a stoma possibility, but at some point i may have to. I'm a pretty tough cookie generally but (and to your wise point about being kind to oneself), my mental and emotional reserves get drained and right now I'm at a very low ebb. Not sure what else I was expecting really but I guess I hoped for some better news.

Will try to get home and take my meds and then try to get out and do some exercise in this torrential rain, which may help a bit.

Sorry to be a downer at the end of the week. I'll read your post again when feeling stronger, as the example of your neighbour is inspiring. If it comes to that for me, I like to think I could follow.thay example and be determined to bith beat this and not let the possible.l stoma hold me back. I just don't have it in me today right now to feel it.

Thank you so much for your support.

X

You are not being a downer, you are feeling overwhelmed by the diagnosis and situation,  which is normal and to be expected..

Get home,  take your meds and enjoy your exercise.. think that is a contradiction  minus 3° here in Scotland sun going down...##bekindtoyourself  x

James4000 hi James I’m sorry your feeling so down with what you have been told  hope when your feeling a bit better and on reflection things won’t look too bad  everything we are told takes some sinking in   My thoughts are with you  James  we are here if you need to talk x

Thank you. You are both so kind. Your support is helping me a lot.

I'm thinking of you both too, and hoping together we can ride out the storms in our paths and come put stronger.

Much love

X

️

James4000 hi James hope your feeling better in your mind than the other day. I have my meeting with consultant tomorrow morning I’m feeling anxious wondering what he is going to say. Then an hour later have an appointment with oncologist to see what these trials are like don’t know how to feel right now  thank you for been there. You and Eastendgirl are my two rocks  thinking of you x

Hi tangoPotter and James4000... been thinking of you both I knew you have appt tomorrow tango,  wanted you to know I am thinking of you and holding your hand .. might be worth writing down any qu tions you have for both appts.  really helps if someone goes with you to take notes.. it's difficult to remember what has been said when we are anxious,  which is natural and expected.. always remem r it is your body, your decision... if you need to go away, discuss your options with family or friends... it's your decision and breathe  xx

Eastendgirl thank you for been there  I’ve just cried today I don’t know how to feel  I’m dreading tomorrow  but like you say it’s my body and I don’t think I will be able to make any decisions tomorrow I need to put things to my daughter and consider my options  xxxx

Hi Tango

I know how you feel, I think. Nothing in particular changed on Friday when the mdt met again other than saying it'll be chemo and arranging a first consultation. But I've taken am emotional nosedive and trying to recover.

Good that you have your daughter with you. As Eastend says, it's good to prepare some questions, take notes, have someone there if you can, and take your time over the decisions, which are yours.

I'm finding it daunting, like you are  to move to the next steps of hearing and discussing treatment. Objectively we know this is all part of the journey towards getting better, but it's tough.

Will be thinking of you tomorrow. Take care

Crying is a great release of so many emotions..  bottling everything up causes more stress and pain..

Just remember... your body, your decision..

Care, support and understanding from others is vital, still comes down to your choice xx

Crying is a great release of so many emotions..  bottling everything up causes more stress and pain..

Just remember... your body, your decision..

Care, support and understanding from others is vital, still comes down to your choice xx