Remember you can deal with what you know. Sending strength x

Thank you xxxx

Hi hun, been thinking about you and wondered how you got on, all sounds positive then...I had the magseed and that felt different to, sure she went in in a different place but it's rice size seed that goes into the tumour..just been doing house work and kept thinking hmm how will I be this time next Saturday....that's a shock about your boss, blooming eck, think you are better off away from it, you don't need the stress of work as well......I hope the weather improves whilst I'm off work lol...funny weather at the moment....its the thought of an operation that I'm worried about but suppose that's only normal xxx

How are you lovely? Thinking of you. Just think by this weekend you will be the other side of the surgery. 
completely relate to the “how will I be this time next Saturday”.

Ive been finding it so strange that this weekend is my last weekend with both boobs. Its the testing bit after surgery Im starting to dread now. I feel a bit like Im heading back to “after biopsy” territory all over again. X 

Hi lovely...How do I feel...you know I don't really know, apprehensive, worried, anxious and trying to run before I can walk with the 'what if's' going on my head...work - what a joke only close colleagues are asking how I am, main directors who are close by, not a single how are you, how you feeling, zero support. Anyhow, awww hun, you're going through so much more and yeah the testing after I totally get....got a letter myself yesterday with all the exercises to do the day after the operation, the do's and don't and when not to shower and when to shower....omg it's too much...but has to be done....then front fastening bra's, I don't have any that front fasten and tops that fasten at the front, again all my tops are over the head type...I'm giggling now...MUM have you got........ **** can't afford a new wardrobe of tops lol....xx

Oh hon, sending big hugs its a really scary time. Your not alone, I go through periods where Im quite matter of fact then moments where Im so anxious I feel sick and just want to  scream. Thats so annoying with work, I cant help but feel directors, managers have a duty of care to check in with you let alone it just being the right and kind thing to do!! Its a bit like that in my work right now, Im just keeping my distance and focusing on one day at a time (or at least trying too!). Im hoping not to have a drain so was reading over the exercises myself today!! Oh I managed to pick up front fastening surgical bras cheap in Primark! Same here on the tops :-D the only ones I have that are front fastening are my scruffy comfy hoodies, or posh work blouses so its my comfy hoodies for me for a while. Check out ebay for breast surgery pillows hon, they arent too expensive and Im not sure if you need them for a lumpectomy but could be handy for when your trying to sleep during recovery I ordered one yesterday xxx

Aww thanks hun, definitely doing one day at a time...hey that's a good idea, I've got a few hoody tops, perfect, thanks hun. Yeah the pillow, I've got one, got it from etsy and been using it in bed and it does make a difference. I'm taking it with me to hospital for the journey home so it can go over the seat belt. It's heart shaped and so comfy xxx

Good luck today lovely!! Im sure all will go smoothly and by the end of today you will be the other side of surgery and on the road to recovery xxx

Good luck TM1  hope you are discharged today too and you can go home and rest in peace. Xx

Hi Redruth84, I'm home hun, back home about 7pm..what a long day, I had a lot of tears but I couldn't have asked more from all the nurses, they were fantastic. Well operation...I know it was a few hours ago but better than what I thought. However I woke up and was positive I'd been asleep for two days solid and that it was Sunday, boy did I cry...half hour later back on ward with butty, cup of tea and biscuits. Regular blood pressure checks etc, visit from Surgeon and extra dressing applied and then released lol. Had my daughter and partner with me...bloody pressure socks for 28 days, not keen on that...gave me pain relief to come home with. Already got a one to one rehab appointment sent for Thursday at....8am, omg, will have to change it I think as partner can't take me, don't know if I'll be up to driving then....pain kicking in a bit know....hope you're OK? Xxxx

Hi Rambleon88, I'm home hun, back home about 7pm..what a long day, I had a lot of tears but I couldn't have asked more from all the nurses, they were fantastic. Well operation...I know it was a few hours ago but better than what I thought. However I woke up and was positive I'd been asleep for two days solid and that it was Sunday, boy did I cry...half hour later back on ward with butty, cup of tea and biscuits. Regular blood pressure checks etc, visit from Surgeon and extra dressing applied and then released lol. Had my daughter and partner with me...bloody pressure socks for 28 days, not keen on that...gave me pain relief to come home with. Already got a one to one rehab appointment sent for Thursday at....8am, omg, will have to change it I think as partner can't take me, don't know if I'll be up to driving then....pain kicking in a bit know....hope you're OK? Xxxx

Oh hon sending massive hugs Im so glad it went well!! Ive been thinking of you. Oh bless take it really easy and be kind to yourself. The physical and mental effects of everything we are all going through are brutal but your one huge step towards recovery and having this in your rear view mirror! So glad your daughter and partner were with you. Im starting to really feel the nerves to be honest hon I go from feeling okay to bricking it. Washed all my hospital stuff earlier so I can pack a hospital bag, my surgeon said I should be able to go home same day but want to be prepared. Keep us posted on how your feeling hon, you aren't alone and well done for facing today and coming out the other side of it!! Xxxx

Oh hon sending massive hugs Im so glad it went well!! Ive been thinking of you. Oh bless take it really easy and be kind to yourself. The physical and mental effects of everything we are all going through are brutal but your one huge step towards recovery and having this in your rear view mirror! So glad your daughter and partner were with you. Im starting to really feel the nerves to be honest hon I go from feeling okay to bricking it. Washed all my hospital stuff earlier so I can pack a hospital bag, my surgeon said I should be able to go home same day but want to be prepared. Keep us posted on how your feeling hon, you aren't alone and well done for facing today and coming out the other side of it!! Xxxx

Awww thank you so much sweetheart means an awful lot. Ya know I did what you said, joggers and zip up hoody, and as we were in an admissions lounge when it came to getting ready for action lol I actually didn't need my dressing gown, just my slippers. When I got taken to the ward all my belongings were there waiting for me. Another thing, you'll get asked to confirm your name and address tons of times and date of birth as well as what operation your in for, I actually lost count how many times lol...read a couple of chapters of my book...your gonna get through this to hun.....xxx

So glad the zip up hoodies worked out well for you! Ive got mine drying on the line now ready to go into my hospital bag just encase I end up having to stay over night (Hope I dont though!). How are you feeling this morning lovely? Hope your okay xxx

Morning Rambleon88 RedRuth84erll well I slept OK, on my right side with our new pillow under my left arm. Done my first lot of exercises to, felt pulling sensation at times and tad uncomfortable. I do have to be careful though. Got to remember deep breaths every hour as well, keep lungs clear. Still in my dressing gown lol...I was very emotional last night but my neighbour who's a nurse said that was normal after an operation...think it's a sink wash and hair up day today. Both of you have a nice weekend and without being on here I don't think I'd of got through the same...thank you ladies xxxx

Morning hun, message below sweet xxx

Oh lovely Im not surprised you were emotional.  The whole thing from the flagging of a concern to the biopsy then diagnosis to surgery is pretty traumatic. Having that emotional release after having gotten through one big step in it Id have said is expected. Be kind to yourself lovely. Here any time you need hon! Xxx

I do hope you go theatre early hun, they told me I was going after 1pm, so sent other half off to get a breakfast from the cantine. When he came back I was then told to get changed into the lovely gowns and by 11am I was taken to theatre, partner walked so far with me...by 11.45 I was in THE room, again after several checks that was to make sure who I was...giggling at that now...everyone and I mean everyone was just so lovely. My nerves kicked in again and crying but it didn't matter they were lovely and understanding. Most of the time up to the operation we were in a waiting room and only on a ward after the operation. Xxx

Same here hun, just shout out I'll be here xxx

I hope so too to be honest Im okay in moments and then it really is just like a wave of fear washed over me. I sort of joked around with them like “Il happily take sedation before it I wont mind” seriously would take it in a heartbeat though :-D! The surgeon said he will try and get to me first so fingers crossed. Xx

Try not think about it now until the day, I did that albeit I had my moments. Have a lovely tea the night before and get an early night. On the day, when we pulled up in the car park I said I wanted to go home, I got a slight ticking off lol, bloody nervous xxx

It's been a lovely place to get support. I've also got a lot from my Breast Cancer Now Younger Women Together group. 

Of course you'll be up and down. I still am. The rage I felt after the *** up with my oncotype results was like nothing else I've ever felt. I didn't sleep well all that weekend. 

But now whilst I'm still waiting for results at least I now know they should be back by mid next week and when I get home. 

Rest up. Do the exercises (take pain meds first an hour before is my recommendation).  I didn't have a shower for about 2 weeks. Lots of sink washes and trips to the hairdresser for hair washes as my husband wouldn't have managed not to soak my dressings over the bath/sink. Xx