My wife was in this situation around 3 years ago, and she just over 2 years out from treatment. They found 2 lumps, one on top of the other. At first they thought it was just the one, just weirdly shaped, but after the mri, it turned out to be 2. She too was told on the day, and was slightly blinded.

I really can't say this enough, but take someone with you, so you have a second pair of ears. It's amazing the stuff my wife missed, but luckily i was there too, so i picked more stuff up. It was like we were in 2 separate consultations.

Every niggle you get at this point, you will think the worst. That's more than normal. My wife had put her back out a week prior to her diagnosis, had a sore shoulder, had a horrid cough that i had been nagging her to go see about for months prior and she had awful fatigue running up to all this. From her initial "it looks sinister" diagnosis, to her MRI, i won't lie, i was thinking the worst. After her scans, the cough was allergies, the back was mechanical and the fatigue was stress due to her running around after her elderly parents and holding down a full time job. Yeah, my point, the human body is complex and you can have multiple things going on at once, so try not to fret over the other stuff. Easier said then done, but you'll be tense and stressed, and as such you're more like to get muscle aches during this time with that stress.

Thank you so much for this. 
Its very true, Im so unbelievably tense right now its no wonder everything aches. I keep holding my shoulders really high but cant relax enough to get them to sit normally. Im trying my best to avoid Dr Google but its so bloody hard. The community here is fantastic though, Im so beyond grateful to everyone who has responded. 
How is your wife feeling these days ProfBaw? Hope she is happy and well!!

Its the mornings right now Im finding really really difficult as my emotions are everywhere. By tea time I feel more centered and rational but mornings are just awful, has anyone else experienced this? Was there anything that helped? My GP has given diazepam but I dont want to get used to taking it so scared to even start. 

Big hugs everyone xxxx

Morning lovely, my kids are 27 and 24, daughter lives with me, son moved to his dad's back in January. Both taken it ok, my daughter has been amazing and supportive, she's in Rhodes at the moment on holiday and I'm glad she's gone, to enjoy herself. Mornings feel OK if I've managed a sleep, it's evening I find hard, watching tv and mind starts working overtime. Baby steps as my partner says.. just come off the phone from my key worker at the hospital and she was lovely to talk to.  Feeling bit better in myself at this moment in time, but that could change...I think for now tell your son when you are ready to, everyone is different and there's no right or wrong approach, kids are resilient and will be your strength hun. Xxxx

My wife is doing great. Her cancer was classed as highly aggressive and was quite extensive as far as local spread went. But she had a complete response to the treatment, and here we are 2 years out from it and she's still classed as no evidence of disease. Due to her response from the treatment, her reoccurrence percentage is very low. Something like 3%.

No matter how dire things seem just now, there really is life after a cancer diagnosis. This part of the journey is one of the worst parts as far as mental health goes. The unknown is horrendous. But should your results not be what you're hoping for, and you have all the facts at hand, the mental strain becomes a lot less burdensome. You'll have something else to focus on.

The physical part aside, my wife found the most difficult part mentally to deal with was the after part. During her diagnosis, her subsequent treatment, she was busy, had medical support and had nurses etc to fall back on. Afterwards, you're just kinda left to get on with it. She found it difficult to trust her body again. She's on Tamoxifen, so she feels she's still doing something. Again, this is something people with cancer and those around them come to understand. Should you get good news, you'll always be more jumpy when finding something. It never really leaves you.

So glad to hear your feeling a bit better. Yes baby steps definitely, its all so much to take in. Thats great news your key worker is lovely.
Im not going to say anything to my son until I know whats going on. Same with my parents Im not saying anything to them until I know whats happening. Its so strange though I feel so guilty and like Ive done something really wrong. The feeling of guilt and fear is just massive especially in the mornings. 

Thats incredible news with your wife!!! 
oh gosh I can only imagine, going from the speed of appointments, information and treatments to then just be left to it must be very strange. If you dont mind me asking how old was your wife when diagnosed?
Oh bless her, yes trusting your own body again after everything must be so difficult. 
I think regardless of the outcome I will always now have a completely new found respect and fear at how fast life can change and such a appreciation for what I have. X

She's not around to ask just now. I'm absolutely shocking with ages, b'days etc. She was at the tail end of her 40's, that i do know. She'd smack me in the head for not knowing. I'm not ashamed to admit it, but I'm one of those stereotypical guys when it comes to remembering this sort of stuff.

I'm good with round numbers like 30, 35, 40 etc. But give me a 42, 36 etc, i struggle. I remember when i had an accident a few years ago, i was sitting having a massive to and fro with the paramedic in the back of an ambulance about how old i was. We had to eventually get a tablet out and put it through Google. Aye, never ask me folks ages. I know my kid is 16 because a 16th b'day is a biggie. But she'll be 16 until she's 18, and 18 or 19 until she's 21.

Hello everyone.

Im really struggling today (Im so sorry to be on here and just moan) 

Im terrified. I just tried getting some answers out of the breast clinic, my biopsy results are in and due to be discussed by the MDT tomorrow. They haven't cancelled my MRI for Monday.

If it was negative they would probably cancel my MRI for Monday wouldn't they? 
Surely if it was benign they could tell me over the phone? The nurse on the phone sounded very sympathetic and asked if I had a partner. 

The MDT team meet every Friday, the nurse said they will be speaking tomorrow but will likely need the MRI results before speaking to me. 
My mind is racing, I feel so desperate right now, none of this feels real. 

Hi hun, aww calm down sweet, it's the waiting and unknown and THATS EXACTLY what I went through, hence lost the plot and walked out of work! I know what you are going through believe me....I got me letters through the post today, now it's real, but I'm OK, I'm back in work from Monday until operation date....I have to go back due to finance reasons....look, try and keep busy, sort out that drawer that's full of ***, we've all got one.  Lol...its in their hands now hun and they will ring you to go in and have "that chat", don't go alone whatever they say you may not hear it all, not saying it's not good news, I've got everything crossed for you sweetheart. My results were discussed by the team before I knew anything so that's normal...talk to your loved ones, I've told quite a few people not looking for sympathy but if I bumped into them didn't want to break down...I'm not saying it's easy, I'm absolutely petrified, operation omg...but it's a journey I have to go. I've started a diary, just for me when I go to bed, it helps to put my feelings in writing. You'll get there hun, I'm sure you will..xx

Hi hun, aww calm down sweet, it's the waiting and unknown and THATS EXACTLY what I went through, hence lost the plot and walked out of work! I know what you are going through believe me....I got me letters through the post today, now it's real, but I'm OK, I'm back in work from Monday until operation date....I have to go back due to finance reasons....look, try and keep busy, sort out that drawer that's full of ***, we've all got one.  Lol...its in their hands now hun and they will ring you to go in and have "that chat", don't go alone whatever they say you may not hear it all, not saying it's not good news, I've got everything crossed for you sweetheart. My results were discussed by the team before I knew anything so that's normal...talk to your loved ones, I've told quite a few people not looking for sympathy but if I bumped into them didn't want to break down...I'm not saying it's easy, I'm absolutely petrified, operation omg...but it's a journey I have to go. I've started a diary, just for me when I go to bed, it helps to put my feelings in writing. You'll get there hun, I'm sure you will..xx