Hello Bubbles,

I can completely relate. I have crippling health anxiety. Currently writing this from my bed as I've tried getting up this afternoon and felt so ill from.the anxiety that i decided my bed is my safe place! Ive recently been given an urgent 2 week referral too. I found a lump in one breast which is very painful but wasnt too worried..at the time! As soon as my doctor felt my other breast and found another lump I didn't know i had, I immediately went into shut down mode! Barely eaten in the three days since. Not even thirsty. I feel frozen with fear and imagining all sorts (hair loss, death etc!). Im already scared if death and now i just feel debilitated and desperate. Ive tried borrowing some money to book privately but ironically, they're all closed at the weekend, which has made me feel worse. My mum died of ovarian cancer but no ine else in my family has Cancer history so im trying to calm down but instead my brain is on overdrive.

Feel so scared and alone. 

Im thinking of you. Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on. Hugs x

Hi Danni your not alone lovely. I’ve been the same in bed unable to get up. Literally crippled with fear. It’s debilitating isn’t it  I would call them Monday to be asked to go on the cancellation list. I’m going to call back too. Let’s try and help each other get through the wait. I’m so sorry to hear about your mum, the trauma of that won’t help your anxiety either. Sending you so much love xxx

I will thank you. Just responded about you not receiving your appointment that’s awful  x

Me again! It was only Thursday the NHS referral but bearing in mind they are targeted to see you within two weeks, time is ticking! 

I think I will stick to my private one on the 13th, I can’t see the NHs coming back to me and seeing me before then but if they do I will jump at it x

Yes I feel you!! I’ve been on the sofa all day. I’ve been sick and crying constantly. I thought about my family and how I may never see them again. It’s breaking me. I feel guilty I’m seeing this consultant tomorrow now as my poor mum had to wait admittedly they got her in within two days of receiving the referral. I still feel guilty. My mental health is truly broken, I’m consumed with fear. Xx 

Oh yes I remember you saying about the 13th. Hopefully they contact in the mean time. Xx

Hi Nhj91,

I shall be thinking of you tomorrow and hope that nothing untoward is found.

Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on. We are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Thank you jolamine. You really helped when I had the breakdown over mums biopsy. I’m not sure if you remember me saying about it coming back benign but worried about her follow up. You calmed me down and rationalised her biopsy results for me. Xx

Oh Im so sorry to hear this...i can relate 100 percent and im so sorry you're feeling this way. Ive tried every trick in the book but it doesn't seem to be subsiding. Ive nothing to help me sleep (i have an amazing app but when im panicking i get so ill that nothing helps). I know you're feeling guilty about your mum but please, please dont . I know that's easier said than done! Your situations are slightly different and people's mental health is different. Remember we are unique! There's no right or wrong way and your mum is very lucky to have you as a lovely, caring daughter and im certain she knows this. So please, just for today and tomorrow..take every day at a time (I sometimes wish I could take my own advice). The consuming of fear is normal and human. Im exactly the same (been sat down since i got hime and haven't even moved to take my coat off). Filled out the hospital questionnaire which in itself was stressful but everytime i got a pain I was telling myself i know the outcome tomorrow. You are right, it's torture but im hoping the person viewing your results will be patient and explain things thoroughly, confirming that you are safe. 

Reach out anytime, we are all here for you xx

Hello Bubbles...i think that's the same day my NHS referral was, actually! I was relieved they contacted me with an appointment within the two weeks but shocked the appointment wasn't until 3 weeks time (more when they offered it to me). It's torturous. Xx

Hi Dannii you’ve done so well to get that earlier appointment. Tonight might be tricky but hopefully tomorrow  you will get good news. im not impressed with myself. ive spent two hours googling unhelpful things :(

Hi Dannii you’ve done so well to get that earlier appointment. Tonight might be tricky but hopefully tomorrow  you will get good news. im not impressed with myself. ive spent two hours googling unhelpful things :(

Of course, Im thinking the worst and keep getting 'visions' of what they tell me. I just dont know what to do. I think you need to step away now, from Dr Google. I know im such a hypocrite! Id stick to the facts on Cancer Research UK and that's it! It's easy for us to decide our outcome in terribly tough times like these. I think it's natural all the 'research ' we do as we are scared and simply just want to know answers. Being in limbo can be a dark place to be. Praying your answers will be positive and soon. Xx