Please speak to your family or friends, I can't stress how important that emotional support is when you are going through this. They love you and would want to be there for you. 

Thankyou I just don't want to worry them at the moment as they have their own lives and problems but  I need to get myself in a better place than it is at the moment,  I will wait for results  from hospital  that I had done today  I seem to have had a meltdown  this evening the tears won't stop  but thankyou for your kind reply 

Thankyou I just don't want to worry them at the moment as they have their own lives and problems but  I need to get myself in a better place than it is at the moment,  I will wait for results  from hospital  that I had done today  I seem to have had a meltdown  this evening the tears won't stop  but thankyou for your kind reply 

You're more than welcome. I know how you feel, this is not an easy situation but this forum is a good place to speak to other people going through similar situations.

Thankyou again, it's nice to be saying how I feel at this moment I'm going to try to get some sleep I'm not holding my breath  but fingers crossed and again many thanks