So so scared…

Hi all, 

I have had ongoing symptoms since 2022 and in January 2023 I finally went to the gp. She said she couldn’t see anything wrong but gave me some piles cream. I went through tubes and tubes of the stuff with no relief. Come September I was in extreme pain and couldn’t sleep, went to the gp the next day (still in pain) who sent me to a&e. After 8 hours I was told they couldn’t see anything wrong and I was referred to general surgery. First appointment with general surgery didn’t go well, I wasn’t listened to at all and was sent away with yet more piles cream and lactulose. I had my follow up general surgery appointment on Monday 23rd October and the doctor was very concerned and has referred me for an urgent colonoscopy which is this coming Monday 30th October. I am absolutely petrified, not only for what might be found but the last time I was in a theatre I almost died (birth complications) and haven’t been sedated since I was a toddler. I don’t have anyone to talk to as my partner has a history of bowel cancer in his family and has lost 2 sisters and his dad, so I don’t want to worry him unnecessarily or any other friends/family. So I thought this would be the best place to share my feelings xx

  • Hi Kerry,

    A very warm welcome to our forum.

    I am sorry to hear of all that you have been through this year. The colonoscopy is very straightforward. You will probably be offered pain killers, gas and air or sedation. Was it you or your mother who had complications with sedation at your birth? Make sure to tell your care team about this previous experience, so that they can circumvent the problems that you had previously. I myself have stopped breathing under anaesthetic and know how nervous this has made me when undergoing any surgery, so I can sympathise with you. Fortunately, you have choices in this case, so any problems should be avoidable.

    I am so sorry to hear about your partner's family history of cancer and can understand why you don't want to worry him. This must be very hard to keep to yourself. Do you not have anyone else that you could speak to? 

    It will be good to get this over and done with on Monday and then hopefully, get some answers.

    Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on. We are always here for you.

    Kind regards,

    Jolamine xx

  • Thank you for your reply. The  sedation had was when I was a toddler for eye operations, it made me very sick afterwards. The birth complications were when I gave birth to my first born, I haemorrhaged badly and was rushed into theatre and almost died. I have extreme anxiety about going back into a theatre for this colonoscopy. I’m hoping I get some answers either way because not knowing is awful. 
    will keep the post updated when I have some news xx

  • Hi Kerry,

    I am not a doctor, but I suspect that the sedation you had for your eye, would be very different from the one used for a colonoscopy.  The haemorrhage sounds more like a birth complication and is unlikely to happen with a colonoscopy.  As I said before, make sure that your care team know about both complications and they'll be sure to avoid a recurrence.

    I shall be thinking of you on Monday and hope that you sail through it all, despite your anxiety.

    Kind regards,

    Jolaminexx

  • Hi Kerry

    I know its easier said than done but try stay busy from now till your colonoscopy-a little tip I find the liquid bowel prep easier to get down if it's cold from the fridge.  I having had a colonoscopy in the past would opt for sedation, gas and air didn't work for me.  Its just a light sedation.  I'm high risk for bowel cancer like yr husband family history and pre cancerous polyps.  You'll have more of an idea when it's over it's not long to wait now.  Sending love and best wishes and keep us updated will be thinking of you. 

  • I had a colonoscopy yesterday, I managed to have it just with gas and air, it wasn't that painful (childbirth is far worse!). They should be able to tell you straight away if they find anything, including piles, polyps etc. What symptoms have you had? How long ago did you have the birth complications? I only ask because I had a forceps delivery 4 years ago and have had a lot of problems from it, prolapsed bladder and I get a lot of pelvic floor and anal pain, which wakes me up at night. 

  • Hi MJ85,

    I am glad to hear that you managed to get through your colonoscopy yesterday with gas and air .Did you get your results there and then?  - I sincerely hope that nothing untoward was found.

    Kind regards,

    Jolamine xx

  • My birth complications were 15 years ago, my son was 11lb 2oz and facing the wrong way, after trying to turn him I had an emergency c section. Whilst in recovery I heamorraged and was rushed back into theatre where I almost died because they couldn’t stop the bleeding. I have serious trauma because I can remember so much, how cold it was, the panic in the doctors voice etc.

    my sysmptoms started last year with anal itching getting progressively worse, then the back pain started. I started noticing I was going to the toilet more and more but not much was coming out each time. Then I lost the feeling of needing the toilet and only knew I needed to go because I would get itchy and then my stool would just sit in my rectum, I rarely pass them naturally anymore and it’s not because I’m constipated. The back pain is horrendous and I’m tired all the time. I’ve had a little bit of blood which it why I wasn’t thinking cancer until the consultant said she was concerned and sending for urgent colonoscopy x

  • H Kerry

    No wonder you are in trepidation. Your current symptoms sound as if they are having a big impact on your quality of life, so they do need to be investigated. You are on the right path now and will soon have some answers. The unknown is a scary place to be, so irrespective of the outcome, you will feel better once you know what is going on.

    Medicine has advanced a lot in the past 15 years and doctors are better equipped to prevent the type of problems you had then. It sounds as if the haemorrhage was  the cause of all your trouble last time and you certainly shouldn't have the same problems with a colonoscopy. No amount of worry will change anything, so try to enjoy what's left of the weekend. 

    You're stronger than you think and you can do this.

    Jolamine xx

  • Thank you so much, bowel prep tomorrow which isn’t going to be fun but as you said getting an answer either way is going to be good x