Hi Lara. I’ve seen quite a few of you lovely people say how once you got your actual diagnosis, although it wasn’t the answer you wanted, you still felt better (i hope you know what I mean). 

I get my results on 26th. I did call the clinic yesterday as a friend persuaded me. I came away feeling worse than when I went in with no answers to any questions I had. Such as what was actually seen on the ultrasound and mammogram. I was met with 2 areas of concern and if I asked questions it was shrugs of the shoulders and let’s see when we get the biopsy results. They did say they were unsure if benign or malignant but probably benign. 

The nurse couldn’t tell me what was seen but did tell me as they’d booked a telephone call on 26th they must be more towards benign. She said they do still get malignancies even though they think benign and in that case I would get a call to ask me to come in. 

it has helped and last night I slept better. So glad you’ve been given the all clear. You’ve smashed it Lara

Awww Gooner. It must be so hard to know when you look in the mirror it will be different and no matter what people say it’s how you feel that matters. So much can be done these days though so once things settle for you hopefully you will be able to take comfort in knowing that you are super brave and strong. You’ve got this!!! 

what date is the surgery?

lots of love xxx

Thanks Lofty.

My surgery is on Tuesday 24th. I can’t wait to get it over with, but am dreading it at the same time- if you know what I mean. Obviously I don’t really want it at all! 

Im glad things are looking positive for you xx

Thanks Lara. I know there’s still a chance but I do feel better for it. Just need to keep everything crossed. Xx

I hope you have lots of support around you. WoW Tuesday. I’ll be thinking of you. Your emotions must be all over the place Gooner. Xx

Thank you. It all feels a bit surreal if I’m honest. I’ve had a busy work week but have now finished until I’ve recovered from the surgery. Work has provided some normality but now that’s finished it’s all feeling more scary. 
I’ve been sent 3 lots of flowers by friends in the last couple of days. My lounge is like a florist! It’s all very weird , especially because physically I feel completely normal xx 

Work definitely does provide some normality and hopefully as soon as you’ve had your surgery you will be in a better place to move forward. Take one day at a time. 

sounds like you have some lovely friends. Have you not been run down or picking colds etc up regularly? 
xz

Gooner 

so lovely you had flowers , just wait till you have your op your house will be full mine was like a flower shop so lovely of people thinking of us , but since then I can’t have a fresh flower in my house lol it just reminds me of that time of my life isn’t it strange how things work like that xx hope you have a great weekend do spoil yourself now it’s you time for next few weeks lovely xx 

Yes- usually I can’t wait to get away from work, but I’ve preferred to be there the last week or so. Definitely one day at a time - I find that hard though, as I’m always looking and planning ahead.

Yes- I have some lovely friends that are trying to be supportive. I know it’s hard for people as my diagnosis has been a shock for them and they don’t know what to say.

No- I haven’t had any colds or anything. As for being run down- I often feel run down. It’s the nature of my job and the long hours I work. So if I feel tired or a bit run down, that’s quite normal and I think nothing if it xx