Hi Kitty.

I know it's really hard not to worry but I can't help feeling that if there was a possibility of your lump being cancer someone would have mentioned it by now. Have you actually asked the question "Could this be cancer?". I can only speak from personal experience but I was told it was likely to be cancer as soon as I had had a mammogram. I had a biopsy 2 weeks later which confirmed it. Again, I'm not an expert but the fact that they have been messing about with your lump and have drawn fluid from it without mentioning cancer makes me think it may well not be. It sounds as if you are worrying a lot which is perfectly understandable but ultimately it does no good. It is what it is. There is nothing you can do to change things. If, and it's a big if, it is cancer you will cope. Right now you are scared and frightened of the prospect of having cancer but believe me you will cope far better than you think. When I was told I had breast cancer my initial knee *** reaction was "I can't do this" but I did. I won't lie and say it was easy but it wasn't as bad as I had feared. I don't know your family situation but I am on my own and still managed to get through it. Use all the support you can get. Tell people of your fears and don't bottle things up. There are always people on this forum who will talk to you and give you any support they can but they can't give you a hug!

I really hope that you have good news very soon and can stop worrying but if it is cancer, don't panic. Easier said than done but you are so much stronger than you think. You CAN do this! You WILL do this!

Sending best wishes and a big virtual hug, Mog, xx

Hi Kitty, hope this message finds you as well as can be expected. I can understand how being a nurse can make you more aware than most of the medical issues you encounter in your own life. You sound a little calmer than your first post and I do hope that that is the case. As I said worrying although completely understandable achieves nothing and I'm sure you tell your patients that. When do you see someone next? I hope it's soon and that you get some difinitive answers. Make sure you don't leave the consultation until you have the information that you need. I really don't like my oncologist much, he's a bit of a cold fish and I left my first few consultations with him with unanswered questions. After that I made myself make sure he gave me the info that I wanted. If, and its still a big if, it is cancer, you will get access to the breast care nurses and they are brilliant at explaining anything your oncologist hasn't made clear. If, if it comes to it make use of them. As a nurse yourself I'm sure you know that nurses are often more well informed with the practical stuff than the doctors. The very best piece of advice I got during chemo came from a nurse and when I mentioned it to my oncologist he'd never heard of it. If, again, big if, you do have cancer I'd be more than happy to hold your hand through the ether and answer any questions I can and pass on tips and tricks I learnt the hard way.

I really hope that you get some good news very soon. Please do keep me informed. I am sending you a friend request if you would like to message with me privately. I am guessing by our choice of user names that we are both cat lovers so we have that in common at least.

Wishing you all the best, keep calm, whatever this is you are strong, far stronger than you think. 

Love and big hugs, Mog, xx

If they thought it was cancer they would have said, and treatment would have begun promptly. Your lump has reduced in size which doesn't sound very likely with cancer - I'm not a doctor but I don't think cancer shrinks. I hope you get some good news soon.