Hi .

  I'm awaiting an urgent referral for pain in my left breast and I've Dr googled and I'm convinced it's the worst of the worst.  

Im getting headaches and I thought if I had cancer it's already spread but I'm really scared as I have 4 daughters one who has special needs and I have thoughts going through my mind what I would say or do.  I'm here if you need a chat,  hopefully the sickness is anxiety as the waiting is hell

Kernow

Hi La78,

A very warm welcome to our forum.

I am sorry to hear about the anxiety that these symptoms are causing you. Are you aware that not all breast lumps are cancerous? Many turn out to be benign cysts, fibrous or hormonal changes. I am glad to hear that your appointment at the breast clinic is due soon. Only 1 person in every 8 referred will get a cancer diagnosis, so the odds are still in your favour.

Nearly all of us tend to be emotional wrecks when we are waiting for a diagnosis. Our imaginations take over and bring us to all sorts of dark places, but fortunately, this seldom happens. I have had 2 bouts of breast cancer in the past 12 years. I discovered both lumps myself and had no pain or discomfort until after I discovered the lumps and couldn't resist feeling them so often. It was then that I began to feel nauseous, but this was due to the tremendous anxiety more than anything else. I was also extremely fatigued all of the time.

Even if the worst comes to pass. Breast cancer is now one of the most treatable forms of cancer. I still lead a busy and fulfilling life, despite my diagnosis.

Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on. We are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Kernow,

It is never a good idea to consult Dr Google. Much of the information is poorly researched, out of date and aimed at the more sectacular cases. This will only scare the pants off you.

It is natural that your mind springs to your children immediately. I was the same at first. SInce then I have seen my children leave school, go to university graduate, find gainful employment, marry and have a family of their own. It is always helpful to keep busy, as this makes the waiting time seem to pass a little quicker. This shouldn't be difficult with four daughters to look after. I am not going to repeat what I said to La78, but you might find some of this helpful too.

Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on. We are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hello 

Thanks for replying. It's so difficult to remain positive when it's a 50/50 chance of having it and what that entails. The scariest thing is leaving my babies behind as I've 3 daughters.

Trouble is you Google things to try and inform yourself but it leads to dread of the what might be. I've had headaches and nausea but it come and goes. 
 

Hopefully you will receive your appointment soon. It's usually within 2 weeks so you should hear by this week. If not I'd call them. 
 

La78

Thanks for replying Jolamine

Sorry to hear you've been through this before. It's an awful feeling. But it's reassuring that your here and able to inform others of your experiences. I just can't help wonder what if. I keep feeling the lump and feel nauseous. I've never suffered with sickness before now and so can't help but think it's because I've got cancer. God the wait it unbearable. We just want to know either way so we can deal with it. I feel like I'm just wasting time xx

Hi, 

Its the unknown thats scary.  I'm too trying to stay positive but I have pain so it doesn't go from my mind.  At night it's the worst.  

Hopefully we both get answers soon.   Im not going on Google as I want try to be more positive.  My anxiety like yours is through the roof and so it's making me have headaches.

Let me know how you get on, as will I

Kernow

Hi Kernow,

I knew that I recognised your name. Welcome back to the forum that nobody really wants to join.

These things sometimes happen for a good reason.   I hope that I'm not speaking out of turn. If you haven't already done so, perhaps it's time to make some long term plans for your autistic daughter? - not that you'll need them just now, but for your general peace of mind. One of my friends is in a similar situation. She was diagnosed with bowel cancer a few years ago. Having things in place has taken so much weight off her shoulders.

 With all of you children being over 18, they should be more of a help than a hindrance these days. Have you told them anything yet? My children were a couple of years younger than your daughters when I was first diagnosed, but once they got over the initial shock, both have been a great support for me. I try to be as positive as I can be and this makes a big difference to us all. You will find that reaching out to others and talking aout your fears is a help. You may find that some don't know how to talk about it and others dont want to talk about it, so you may lose some friends. However, I have made more friends that I have lost in the past 12 years.

I am so glad to hear that your swollen lymph node turned out to be nothing sinister. I understand that this can happen quite often. Try to forget all that you've read on google. If you were to believe everything written there, you'd be in a six foot box with the common cold. 

I sincerely hope that your appointment comes through soon and that all turns out well.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi La78,

It is an awful feeling, but we all come to terms with it. If it's of any help, it becomes easier to deal with once we know what we are dealing with, irrespective of the outcome. Coping with the unknown is never easy. My nausea settled as soon as I knew what I was facing.. 

How many children do you have and have you mentioned any of this to your family yet? As I said before, this could well be due to other causes. Only another week to go now - I know that this feels like forever, but try to keep yourself busy to help the waiting time to pass.

Keeping my fingers crossed for good news.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine,

I have looked at long term placements before Covid hit, but my husband is against it.  We both have heard bad things but I keep saying there are many good places.  If I do have something sinister then he wouldn't be able to cope with her on his own.  I think this is why I find talking to my husband very difficult when something on health comes up as he gets worried about being able to cope if I'm not around.  

That's why I have quiet anxiety and coming on here it helps to talk things through.

This time I'm scared, when I talked to the emergency doctor I thought she was going to give me some different tablets, not send me for an urgent referral.  

Roll on 8 for me to phone up.

Kernow