Husband and sister diagnosed with cancer at the same time

My amazing husband got diagnosed with pancreatic cancer 6 weeks ago. The week prior we got the news my sister had 12 month to live with a brain tumour.  It came as a complete shock to all of us and it's been a whirlwind of everything. He starts treatment tomorrow but I need to know how I'm supposed to be. It currently feels like I'm being everything to everyone right now even an emotional crutch to his parents. I'm trying to be as positive as possible and just had a complete breakdown when walking the dog (the other dog walkers much have thought I'm mad). I know there's no rule book but why do I feel so selfish that my whole life has been turned upside down in an instant. I want to turn the clock back 

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  • Hi

    Sorry to read about your husband and sister. Do you have a close friend you could talk with someone that perhaps could be a go between for you and family. 

    You really need to look after yourself and get support as you are going to need it. 

    Your obviously a strong person that's why they are leaning on you but you need a post as well.

    I've started chemo and my partner is being my rock but I'm totally aware it's going to affect him too and he needs time out so I insist he still plays golf, goes to the pub etc.

    Totally understand about wanting to turn the clock back thats how we feel but now we have to take it a day a time. 

    Look after yourself 

    Xxx

  • I e got a couple of friends who have been amazing through this but it's odd because people are really unsure how to react. I don't want to be that person who just whines all the time because things are being rubbish. It's really hard right now 

  • People find it hard to discuss thats what we found in the beginning. Once they realised it was real and knew found it easier.

    You have every right to whine but there will come a time when you'll feel strong enough move forward positively.

    Xx

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