During Covid in 2020 I became breathless developed a new continuous cough had a fever etc - unfortunately unable to see GP - believed that I had a chest infection as I had history of pneumonia and chest infections - given several courses of anti biotics - didnt work - eventually saw my GP sent for x ray - then referred to lung specialist diagnosed stage 1V lung cancer with two months life expectancy but with chemo life expectancy 6- 12mths . complete devastation change of life for me and family friends etc. started chemo immediately - had severe side effects - alternative treatment immunotherapy - extreme side effects - after discussion with family stopped all treatment to have a better quality of life. I suffer from extreme tiredness muscle wastage and many more side effects due to my medication. But on a positive note I live each day as it comes - at the mo have one bad day then have good day with family - I receive lot and lots of professional support to help me cope with the life changing health condition and have regular contact with the oncology department.Life is like a roller coaster up and down never know what the the day will bring. Not sure what my life exectancy is now but do I really want to have a time frame as want to enjoy every poossible moment with my family grandchildren and friends. i feel that stopping the treatment was the best decision that I had made eventhough I have bad days but at the mo the good and bad days are equal - have CT scan at the end of the month so we will see if the cancer if still stable or spread elsewhere as I do feel quite weak and very tired not much appetite thankfully I have the supllemental drinks -
I found a brilliant web site called lookgoodfeelbetter that gave loads of advice - I got myself a wig as my hair went extremely thin - it is now growing back thick ad healthy which makes me feel good.
I am very confused as I dont know how I should be feeling as people say I am looking well but the inside of me is not - it is this facade and pretense stating that I am fine and it is all a dream and will go away and feel like shouting look I am very ill cant you see!!!!!
